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#1
After seeing the "First time you drank-what age" thread I thought it would be funny to hear some of the stories kinda like that guy that said the first time he drank he watched a naked dude in his room.

Quote by Goin' Mobile
I stayed home from school one day when I was 15 and saw a bottle of wine on the counter and thought, "Hey, why have I never drank before? I could just fill up what I drank with grape juice." So that's what I did and I got drunk the first time.

The first time I got HAMMERED I drank a cup of vodka and 10 beers and went to Burger King and threw a bottle of beer at the outside wall and it shattered. The manager came out and started yelling at me and I shouldered him as I walked by into the restaurant. I walked straight up to the soda machine and put my mouth right on it and pressed the lever and started drinking soda. The manager was still yelling at me so I decided to leave. I ran at the door and did a flying sidekick into it and it almost hit some old asian couple walking in. Haha.

We should make a thread for best drunk stories.
I woke up this morning and I got myself a beer. The future's uncertain and the end is always near.

Quote by BlackIce87
I'm not gonna lie, goin' mobile looks like Sebastian Bach in the eighties.
#2
I was drunk once, I used the search bar.


But to be fair, all of those threads are like eons old. So I guess this is justified?
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
#3
Me and 3-4 friends decided to have a nice relaxing night together, and introduce me to weed. I had never been high or drunk before.

Anyway, I remember I grabbed my cup of water that was on the coffee table nearby, and I began to lift it to my mouth. At that point I began to focus on the music playing, which I remember was Led Zeppelin, and when the cup touched my mouth, it startled me and I jumped and spilled the water all over myself.

I forgot that I was bringing the cup to my mouth to get a drink.

It looked stupid and no one knew what happened, but I did. And I was embarrassed.

EDIT: Jeez, what is it with all of these anti-alcohol / weed people in this thread? The kind of people who denounce alcohol inbetween their 3rd and 4th Mountain Dew of the day? People need to accept reality and realize there is beauty in moderation.
"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
Last edited by SlinkyBlue at Jul 6, 2009,
#4
This one time, I was sooooooo ****ing sober, and I went to this party and we had a good time without alcohol, drugs, and other things such as narcotics and sexual intercourse.
I love Foxy Shazam more than you.



▲ ▲

#5
Quote by OzarkMDaredevil
This one time, I was sooooooo ****ing sober, and I went to this party and we had a good time without alcohol, drugs, and other things such as narcotics and sexual intercourse.


oh, here we go...

"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
#6
Quote by SlinkyBlue
oh, here we go...



I apologize, but we have seen millions of these threads. I am tired of seeing the same threads over and over again.
I love Foxy Shazam more than you.



▲ ▲

#7
yea, i dont drink, but my family does and this one time my grandma got ****faced and started stripping for my grandpa with the doors open. it was nasty. and another time she got ****faced and broke her noses in the bathroom at a country club for golfers. and another time she got drunk and my sister took her to a nelly concert... she flipped out, because just like me she dosent like rap or pop songs.
thats one of the many reasons why i dont drink or do drugs lol.
Quote by Suffrin
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Last edited by selibucaz at Jul 6, 2009,
#9
my friend got drunk the other night and he challenged "shadowmen" and he acted like chip coffey from paranormal state. I drove him around, me being completely sober.
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Quote by pepsi1187
not to mention herbert from family guy will touch you in your sleep
#11
Quote by OzarkMDaredevil
This one time, I was sooooooo ****ing sober, and I went to this party and we had a good time without alcohol, drugs, and other things such as narcotics and sexual intercourse.



haha, this reminded me of the time I posted that flyer metaldud made for the rave I was gonna have all around my school (it said come to rave there will be homosexuals) so I got caught like halfway through the day. The one teacher was like "DO YOU KNOW WHAT IS ASSOCIATED WITH RAVES!" I was like "Techno?" "NO, DRUGS, ALCOHOL, AND!!! AND!!" (she was waiting for me) I just said "Techno." "NO... SEX!"


That was a horrible story. I'm sorry.
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
#12
Quote by OzarkMDaredevil

I apologize, but we have seen millions of these threads. I am tired of seeing the same threads over and over again.


Well, if not new threads, people will flame for old threads getting revived. I'm tired of people going "meh! I've already talked about this so I'm going to spoil it for everyone else!"

When will the hypocrisy stop?!

It's good to bring back old topics that haven't been talked about for a bit.

I sincerely apologize that the pit cannot be 100% original content, all the time.
"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
Last edited by SlinkyBlue at Jul 6, 2009,
#13
Quote by SlinkyBlue
I was blazed one night, haven't really been high before this time. Me and 3-4 friends decided to have a nice relaxing night together, and introduce me to weed.

Anyway, I remember I grabbed my cup of water that was on the coffee table nearby, and I began to lift it to my mouth. At that point I began to focus on the music playing, which I remember was Led Zeppelin, and when the cup touched my mouth, it startled me and I jumped and spilled the water all over myself.

I forgot that I was bringing the cup to my mouth to get a drink.

It looked stupid and no one knew what happened, but I did. And I was embarrassed.



haha something pretty similar!!

the first time i got high, it was just before playing an acoustic show and i got a coke from the bar. while watching the band on stage i became very focused on that and only that. as i was lifting the drink to my mouth i tipped it up as if i were drinking from a bottle and the glass was about 10 cm from my face. and i just spilled my coke.. it was bizzare and i was like wtf?!

i just... missed?
#14
Quote by SlinkyBlue
Well, if not new threads, people will flame for old threads getting revived. I'm tired of people going "meh! I've already talked about this so I'm going to spoil it for everyone else!"

When will the hypocrisy stop?!

It's good to bring back old topics that haven't been talked about before.

I sincerely apologize that the pit cannot be 100% original content, all the time.


Eh, whatever. I was just joking around! Christ....


Quote by monkeysintheday
haha, this reminded me of the time I posted that flyer metaldud made for the rave I was gonna have all around my school (it said come to rave there will be homosexuals) so I got caught like halfway through the day. The one teacher was like "DO YOU KNOW WHAT IS ASSOCIATED WITH RAVES!" I was like "Techno?" "NO, DRUGS, ALCOHOL, AND!!! AND!!" (she was waiting for me) I just said "Techno." "NO... SEX!"


That was a horrible story. I'm sorry.



Awesome story brother!
I love Foxy Shazam more than you.



▲ ▲

Last edited by OzarkMDaredevil at Jul 6, 2009,
#15
i listened to songs backwards for musical inspiration when i was sky high

try listening to electricityscape by the strokes backwards, it sounds kinda like dreaming, by blondie, with a very new wave feel to it. sad as it may sound but i like that song backwards better than forwards
#16
I got high and ate an entire box of cereal (actually, it was a bag). I think it was generic cocoa puffs, but I'm not all that sure. That was fun, I guess.
Lord Gold feeds from your orifices and he wants to see you sweat.
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Now say his name.....
#17
my first time getting high sucked ass. my best friend is a super stoner and he has really good hook ups and he tells me everything about weed so i know a lot about it. so we got some really good weed, i took like 30 hits of a pipe, and i was ****ing blow, it sucked really bad though. i forgot everything that happend 5 seconds after it happens. my friend in a wheel char came over (hes a stoner to) and as we walked to the park i pushed him. i was so light head i almost fell down every step i took, i forgot i was pushing my friend so i led go of him (he was high as well but not like i was) and i pushed him in to the street and he almost got hit by a car. what i felt was one of the worst feeling ever i think. my friend (the super stoner) says i should smoke more weed to get a different level of high, we smoked some more out of about 2 joints and i felt even worse.

so this post comes with a question, did i just have a bad first time or will this happen every time?
Quote by vulcan422
i wish i could see Children Of Bodom agen
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Last edited by vulcan422 at Jul 6, 2009,
#18
I don't have any fantastic stories for me, but I had a friend who wanted to keep drinking but her friends wouldn't let her, so she tried to hide beers in the bathroom so she could drink. Another time, these two straight chicks got high at a party and made out/felt each other up in front of every single partygoer
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Quote by voodoochild23
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#19
Quote by SlinkyBlue
Well, if not new threads, people will flame for old threads getting revived. I'm tired of people going "meh! I've already talked about this so I'm going to spoil it for everyone else!"

When will the hypocrisy stop?!

It's good to bring back old topics that haven't been talked about before.

I sincerely apologize that the pit cannot be 100% original content, all the time.


THANK YOU! If people don't want to talk about something then the thread will get old from lack of posts and die. So until then...

And another time I was drinking and *ahem* smoking "tea" and we were in an alley. My pants were feeling tight so I unbuttoned them when I sat down. About 30 minutes later a cop comes. We all run.

I had my hair in a pony tail, a cigarette in my mouth, and a beer in my hand. And, my pants kept falling down! So as I was running I would have to stop to pull up my pants, and yell to my friends, "Wait for meeeee!" I got away without dropping my beer or cigarette. SUCCESS!!!
I woke up this morning and I got myself a beer. The future's uncertain and the end is always near.

Quote by BlackIce87
I'm not gonna lie, goin' mobile looks like Sebastian Bach in the eighties.
#20
Not really high/drunk, but I have to take Ambien because I have trouble sleeping and one of the times I was on it, I punched my sister in the face after eating cereal and walked into my room. Dora the Explorer was on and so was Rosetta Stoned by Tool so I sat in my corner crying because I though she was coming out of the TV to get me.

Another time, I attacked the invisible nazis with a fly swatter.
#21
Quote by soundgarden1986
Not really high/drunk, but I have to take Ambien because I have trouble sleeping and one of the times I was on it, I punched my sister in the face after eating cereal and walked into my room. Dora the Explorer was on and so was Rosetta Stoned by Tool so I sat in my corner crying because I though she was coming out of the TV to get me.

Another time, I attacked the invisible nazis with a fly swatter.


Proof is mine.

What about Billy Mays and smooth criminal?
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
#22
Just too much too quick. Start with weaker stuff and work up, or smoke in moderation. One bowl of just about anything would work nicely.
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#23
Quote by vulcan422
my first time getting high sucked ass. my best friend is a super stoner and he has really good hook ups and he tells me everything about weed so i know a lot about it. so we got some really good weed, i took like 30 hits of a pipe, and i was ****ing blow, it sucked really bad though. i forgot everything that happend 5 seconds after it happens. my friend in a wheel char came over (hes a stoner to) and as we walked to the park i pushed him. i was so light head i almost fell down every step i took, i forgot i was pushing my friend so i led go of him (he was high as well but not like i was) and i pushed him in to the street and he almost got hit by a car. what i felt was one of the worst feeling ever i think. my friend (the super stoner) says i should smoke more weed to get a different level of high, we smoked some more out of about 2 joints and i felt even worse.

so this post comes with a question, did i just have a bad first time or will this happen every time?

That will happen every time, in fact, you just highlighted why weed is so great

EDIT: You will get more control over how you feel, if you smoke more (which I'm not saying you should). But the feeling of being retarded is one of the reasons I find smoking fun. But I'm not all uptight about how my body feels and all that stuff, so..
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Last edited by stinger12345 at Jul 6, 2009,
#25
i got extremely hammered in my friend's dorm one night shortly before thanksgiving last year. my memory from the night was very fuzzy, i blacked out and woke up in his roommate's bed after he woke me up at around 11 am. obviously i was experiencing the worst hangover i'd ever had in my life. so i got the rest of my booze, put it in my backpack, and headed back to my dorm. on the way out i passed a group of prospective students taking the campus tour. i got back to my dorm and remembered i had class (he was gonna give out extra credit just for showing up that day). the day was finally over and i decided to go ahead and FINALLY sleep off my hangover. i woke up a few hours later and changed so i could go see gwar later that night. it's then that i looked in the mirror and noticed my clothes were covered in multiple specks of my own vomit.


tl;dr i got hammered and ended up puking on my clothes. in the depth of my hangover, i walked around campus, went to class, and walked past prospective students in vomit-covered clothes.
Go Veg.
Last edited by im not mental at Jul 6, 2009,
#26
at senior week in ocean city i got so smashed that i took a dump in one of the mini golf holes. i have no recollection of the event. the only reason i know i did it was becaue i couldnt find my van halen t shirt. apparently i wiped my booty with it...
#28
Quote by soundgarden1986
This will not be discussed due to them being too long to type, and I'm a lazy asshole.



haha, ok.

There's also your ability to speak German fluently.


EDIT:

You're lucky I can't find my phone, I would have posted that pic.
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
Last edited by monkeysintheday at Jul 6, 2009,
#29
my friend was a a mates place, and the mate put gin in his apple juice. My friend ran up to the guys sixteen yo. sis , looked a her DD "whoaaaa" proceded to well fill in the blanks
Quote by Myfirstpubes
you're saying that everytime someone in the Pit fapped, they produced magic? Wow, we'd be in fucking Narnia by now by the Pit's rate of masturbation.
#30
Oh, good story I forgot about; I bought one of those huge bags of chips for the guys one night, salt and vinegar, the size that should be good for a week or so... yeah, I ate the whole damn thing because no one wanted any.

I didn't poop for 5 days.
"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
Last edited by SlinkyBlue at Jul 6, 2009,
#31
got really really stoned. left my friends front door open and realized it, so i searched frantically for his dogs. i told him they were gone and we walked all over town for nearly 4 hours. when we got back i looked through the window and they had been in the back yard the whole time. hahaha. ****.
#33
Haha. The other day my friends were smoking weed and they were going through an empty toll booth. When they drove through they saw a sign that said smile your on camera and then a flash went off. They had the pipe out and everything. lol.
#34
thought this would be a good place to say i can't feel my left side. am i just tired?
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
#36
Quote by stinger12345
ya, you should just sleep it off.


im alright now. My phone rang and scared my left side.
BRIAN. SCHNEIDER.
#37
Quote by SlinkyBlue
Oh, good story I forgot about; I bought one of those huge bags of chips for the guys one night, salt and vinegar, the size that should be good for a week or so... yeah, I ate the whole damn thing because no one wanted any.

I didn't poop for 5 days.


I took a huge poop today. yesterday, not so huge. pooping is awesome.

/attempt to turn this into the poop thread
#38
Quote by soundgarden1986

Another time, I attacked the invisible nazis with a fly swatter.


i have to sig that
#39
Worst drunk time for me was my 21st birthday, went out to dinner with friends, ate a $40 dinner, got so piss drunk later that I not only threw up the $40 dinner, but was a complete trainwreck. Near the end of the night (say around 2 am?), last thing I remember I was chatting up this girl, next thing I know I'm on the floor of the bathroom babbling to an ex-gf at 4:30 am on the phone, face on the toilet seat, wondering where the last 2 and a half hours went.

Next morning this girl insists on taking me out to breakfast, I'm extremely hungover and still sick as dog, in someone else's shirt and my phone is in 3 pieces, takes me to this really fancy breakfast place, had a $20 breakfast consisting of lamb chops and mimosa, only to once again, throw it back up when I got back to my apt and passed out the rest of the day.
Last edited by al112987 at Jul 6, 2009,
#40
Smoked a lot of weed with some friends and pretty much reenacted that weird role playing game/fighting game in Role Models at the park. So it was a bunch of stoned kids fighting with branches and rocks. Then some of the cops came (curfew) and almost joined in. It was really funny.
Quote by metabolicmaggot
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