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#1
So pit, everyone loves a good pickup line, and every man should have a few at his disposal for that faithful day when you spot Megan Fox across the bar and can't find a rose.


One of my favourites is the eternally creepy rural Irish favourite: "How would you like to be buried with my people?"

Or: "If I were to ask you to have sex with me would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?"
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#4
I would hypnotize her with my poetry.

Roses are red
Grass is green
Spread your legs and I'll fill you with cream.
Quote by MakinLattes
dwelling on past mishaps is for the weak. you must stride into the future, unabashed and prepared to fuck up yet again.
#6
"Was it you who was staring at me, or was it me who couldn't keep my eyes off you?"

I'd better not be the only one who knows where that's from, Pit.
Jackson Kelly KE3 w/P-Rails; Aria Pro II TSB-350
• ZVex Fuzz Factory; DigiTech Whammy; Danelectro Fish & Chips; Marshall ED1; Fulltone OCD; DigiTech Whammy; Marshall JMP1; Boss CE3; Vox AC4TV

EMU 0404; Reason/Record; M-Audio AV40
#8
"Feel my jumper, what material is it"
"...err, I dunno. Cotton?"
"Boyfriend material"
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#10
Quote by itchy guitar
I would hypnotize her with my poetry.

Roses are red
Grass is green
Spread your legs and I'll fill you with cream.



Classy
#11
*ahem* The Engineering and Physical Sciences department present:

Wanna expand my polynomial?

Would you like to determine the spring constant of my bed?

I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves

I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you home to my domain

I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behaviour

My love for you is like an exponential curve, and is unbounded
#12
Quote by Ur all $h1t
So pit, everyone loves a good pickup line, and every man should have a few at his disposal for that faithful day when you spot Megan Fox across the bar and can't find a rose.


One of my favourites is the eternally creepy rural Irish favourite: "How would you like to be buried with my people?"

Or: "If I were to ask you to have sex with me would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?"

you can't lose!

mine is "are you a parking ticket, because nobody wants you, yet everyone gets you."
"You're a twat!"- That dude in morrisons

"You Ugly git!" - That girl in the restaurant

"You Were a Mistake!" - Mum

just a few of my fans..



#13
Quote by Ur all $h1t
Or: "If I were to ask you to have sex with me would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?"

That.. is awesome
#15
Does this rag smell like chloroform?


Really though I don't see what the big deal about Megan Fox is though.
Because deep down, I know you want to:

My Youtube Channel

Constructive criticism is always welcomed.
#16
Quote by itchy guitar
I would hypnotize her with my poetry.

Roses are red
Grass is green
Spread your legs and I'll fill you with cream.



Got a better one with a bigger chance of success;

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Get in the trunk bitch or i'll slit your throat
lolburger
#17
Quote by Ur all $h1t
So pit, everyone loves a good pickup line, and every man should have a few at his disposal for that faithful day when you spot Megan Fox across the bar and can't find a rose.


Actually Paddy, face it:

(Invalid img)
You already tried once, and got nowhere, I don't think a pickup line will cut it.
#18
I usually just strike up a conversation about congenital disorders, or which pokemon I most want to sleep with. Then I lure them back to my house to watch Dinosaurs and roast marshmallows over a candle.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#19
Quote by LordBishek
*ahem* The Engineering and Physical Sciences department present:

Wanna expand my polynomial?

Would you like to determine the spring constant of my bed?

I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves

I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you home to my domain

I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behaviour

My love for you is like an exponential curve, and is unbounded

i feel like a super nerd for finding this the funniest thing on this thread. and yet i like it...
In speed versus emotional playing, i think of an M16 versus an M24. You can have 650 rounds per minute, or one round, one kill. Both should be in your arsenal.

PSN and XBL: xxWONDERxxBOYxx
Leave a message that you're from UG with your username
#20
Quote by Mr. B.
Does this rag smell like chloroform?


Really though I don't see what the big deal about Megan Fox is though.

Absolutely +1 to this entire post.
Вяєҭҭ
ZeGuitarist's sister is hawt.
?)
#21
Guy (in a concerned tone) : Excuse me, do you know a veterinarian?

Girl: No, why?

Guy (in a manly tone): *Flex arms* Because these puppies are sick!
"The rule of law -- it must be held high! And if it falls you pick it up and hold it even higher!" - Hercule Poirot

© Soul Power
Last edited by Soul Power at Jul 6, 2009,
#23
"Are you wearing starwars pants? cos your arse is out of this world"

That one got a guy my dad works with married! Madness...

Don't let your boat be empty, don't be a sunken dream
Don't let the boat regret thee, for what you could have seen

#24
Quote by Mr. B.

Really though I don't see what the big deal about Megan Fox is though.

Neither do I, I just wanted to make the rose joke


"Hey baby, Do you have colon cancer? Because that ass is killer?"
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#26
I like every bone in your body...
especially mine.

Edit: And here's some more

Nice shirt... Wanna ****?

You have nice legs. What time do they open?

When does your centerfold come out?
Last edited by ItsOnlyGNR at Jul 6, 2009,
#28
That first one's brilliant

Heres mine:
'Is that a mirror in your trousers? Cause I can see myself in them.'

EDIT: ^DAMN YOU













☻/

/▌

/ \


PSN ID: Lord-MacTooth
Last edited by eterom11 at Jul 6, 2009,
#29
What you all will soon come to realise is that pickup lines are extremely lame. Put yourselves in the shoes of a hot girl. This girl gets approached by men all the time, and a vast majority of them approach her with a lame pickup line. First impressions are crucial and the first thing you say may make it or break it for you without you even knowing it. Actually, most girl usually make a subonscious decision within the first 10 minutes of talking to a guy about whether or not she will EVER sleep with him. Its just sexual instinct. The girl will usually go "another lame pickup line... he's just like all the other losers in line" Where as if you can approach her with something different and original, you might just get her attention. Keep in mind that the female brain works VERY differently from yours. Same goes for her sense of humour. You may think you pickup line full of sexual innuendos is hillarious, but trust me, she doesn't.

It's not the pickup lines themselves that suck though. It's the fact that the girl will think "wow, this guys thinks i'm that easy that i would be impressed by him giving me a lame pickup line to start a conversation"

in fact, pickup lines CAN be very powerful, but you need to have good timing. Use it after you've been talking to the girl for an hour or two and you think she might just be interested. In the context it's very different. She gets a vibe of what kind of person you are, she thinks you are funny, she thinks that time passes quickly when she's with you, whatever! Then you pull out a line like "By the way...do you give head to strangers? No? Well good thing we've gotten to know each other a little better" or "How bout we go back to my place, order some pizza and then ****" *SLAP* "Oh, i'm sorry, how about Chinese"
In this context the pickup line has a much higher chance of getting you lucky.


Bottom line is. pickup lines usually suck, so don't use them when you first go and talk to a girl.

This is textbook psychology so yeah... it's all true
<DInkyDaisy>I would so have sex with tauket now.
<SpacedOut>I'd kill to have tauket naked in a bath of warm milk right now.
<Blnkgttrst>Oh Chris, you're what the Spaniards call "El Terrible"
<Jallas>chris you're hot in bed
Last edited by tauket2 at Jul 6, 2009,
#30
Quote by Ur all $h1t


Or: "If I were to ask you to have sex with me would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?"

Holy trees with dicks, I...I have to try that!
"The rule of law -- it must be held high! And if it falls you pick it up and hold it even higher!" - Hercule Poirot

© Soul Power
Last edited by Soul Power at Jul 6, 2009,
#32
why don't you come and sit on my lap, we'll talk about the first thing that pops up

let's play titanic, when i say iceberg you go down

reserved i still have more
Last edited by urdad at Jul 6, 2009,
#33
Quote by tauket2
What you all will soon come to realise is that pickup lines are extremely lame. Put yourselves in the shoes of a hot girl. This girl gets approached by men all the time, and a vast majority of them approach her with a lame pickup line. First impressions are crucial and the first thing you say may make it or break it for you without you even knowing it. Actually, most girl usually make a subonscious decision within the first 10 minutes of talking to a guy about whether or not she will EVER sleep with him. Its just sexual instinct. The girl will usually go "another lame pickup line... he's just like all the other losers in line" Where as if you can approach her with something different and original, you might just get her attention. Keep in mind that the female brain works VERY differently from yours. Same goes for her sense of humour. You may think you pickup line full of sexual innuendos is hillarious, but trust me, she doesn't.

It's not the pickup lines themselves that suck though. It's the fact that the girl will think "wow, this guys thinks i'm that easy that i would be impressed by him giving me a lame pickup line to start a conversation"

in fact, pickup lines CAN be very powerful, but you need to have good timing. Use it after you've been talking to the girl for an hour or two and you think she might just be interested. In the context it's very different. She gets a vibe of what kind of person you are, she thinks you are funny, she thinks that time passes quickly when she's with you, whatever! Then you pull out a line like "By the way...do you give head to strangers? No? Well good thing we've gotten to know each other a little better" or "How bout we go back to my place, order some pizza and then ****" *SLAP* "Oh, i'm sorry, how about Chinese"
In this context the pickup line has a much higher chance of getting you lucky.


Bottom line is. pickup lines usually suck, so don't use them when you first go and talk to a girl.

This is textbook psychology so yeah... it's all true


dude uh... shutup.


Quote by angusfan16
May i push in your stool?




*finger snap*
Last edited by ItsOnlyGNR at Jul 6, 2009,
#34
Quote by LordBishek
*ahem* The Engineering and Physical Sciences department present:

Wanna expand my polynomial?

Would you like to determine the spring constant of my bed?

I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves

I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you home to my domain

I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behaviour

My love for you is like an exponential curve, and is unbounded

I feel mathmetized for getting all those
Quote by Mr. B.
Does this rag smell like chloroform?


Really though I don't see what the big deal about Megan Fox is though.

tbh I agree.
"You're a twat!"- That dude in morrisons

"You Ugly git!" - That girl in the restaurant

"You Were a Mistake!" - Mum

just a few of my fans..



#35
Quote by tauket2
What you all will soon come to realise is that pickup lines are extremely lame. Put yourselves in the shoes of a hot girl. This girl gets approached by men all the time, and a vast majority of them approach her with a lame pickup line. First impressions are crucial and the first thing you say may make it or break it for you without you even knowing it. Actually, most girl usually make a subonscious decision within the first 10 minutes of talking to a guy about whether or not she will EVER sleep with him. Its just sexual instinct. The girl will usually go "another lame pickup line... he's just like all the other losers in line" Where as if you can approach her with something different and original, you might just get her attention. Keep in mind that the female brain works VERY differently from yours. Same goes for her sense of humour. You may think you pickup line full of sexual innuendos is hillarious, but trust me, she doesn't.

It's not the pickup lines themselves that suck though. It's the fact that the girl will think "wow, this guys thinks i'm that easy that i would be impressed by him giving me a lame pickup line to start a conversation"

in fact, pickup lines CAN be very powerful, but you need to have good timing. Use it after you've been talking to the girl for an hour or two and you think she might just be interested. In the context it's very different. She gets a vibe of what kind of person you are, she thinks you are funny, she thinks that time passes quickly when she's with you, whatever! Then you pull out a line like "By the way...do you give head to strangers? No? Well good thing we've gotten to know each other a little better" or "How bout we go back to my place, order some pizza and then ****" *SLAP* "Oh, i'm sorry, how about Chinese"
In this context the pickup line has a much higher chance of getting you lucky.


Bottom line is. pickup lines usually suck, so don't use them when you first go and talk to a girl.

This is textbook psychology so yeah... it's all true

this is actually sound advice.. I may try it some time.. If I pick up some confidence..

but yeah I do like the advice, but tbh, I don't think people we're actually going to use these chat up lines.. or they are a tad unworldly..
"You're a twat!"- That dude in morrisons

"You Ugly git!" - That girl in the restaurant

"You Were a Mistake!" - Mum

just a few of my fans..



#36
Quote by tauket2
What you all will soon come to realise is that pickup lines are extremely lame. Put yourselves in the shoes of a hot girl. This girl gets approached by men all the time, and a vast majority of them approach her with a lame pickup line. First impressions are crucial and the first thing you say may make it or break it for you without you even knowing it. Actually, most girl usually make a subonscious decision within the first 10 minutes of talking to a guy about whether or not she will EVER sleep with him. Its just sexual instinct. The girl will usually go "another lame pickup line... he's just like all the other losers in line" Where as if you can approach her with something different and original, you might just get her attention. Keep in mind that the female brain works VERY differently from yours. Same goes for her sense of humour. You may think you pickup line full of sexual innuendos is hillarious, but trust me, she doesn't.

It's not the pickup lines themselves that suck though. It's the fact that the girl will think "wow, this guys thinks i'm that easy that i would be impressed by him giving me a lame pickup line to start a conversation"

in fact, pickup lines CAN be very powerful, but you need to have good timing. Use it after you've been talking to the girl for an hour or two and you think she might just be interested. In the context it's very different. She gets a vibe of what kind of person you are, she thinks you are funny, she thinks that time passes quickly when she's with you, whatever! Then you pull out a line like "By the way...do you give head to strangers? No? Well good thing we've gotten to know each other a little better" or "How bout we go back to my place, order some pizza and then ****" *SLAP* "Oh, i'm sorry, how about Chinese"
In this context the pickup line has a much higher chance of getting you lucky.


Bottom line is. pickup lines usually suck, so don't use them when you first go and talk to a girl.

This is textbook psychology so yeah... it's all true

edgy meems only friendo :^)
#37
Quote by tauket2

This is textbook psychology so yeah... it's all true

It's not textbook psychology, or at least it's not in any social psych textbook I've ever read.


They're just funny, most of us aren't going to use them.
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#39
Quote by Ur all $h1t
It's not textbook psychology, or at least it's not in any social psych textbook I've ever read.


They're just funny, most of us aren't going to use them.

Psychology gets mentioned, and you get serious. On the ball, as always my friend.

Most of the passable chat-up lines have already been posted unfortunately, but they are absolutely hilarious
Ego inflating praise here:
Quote by Fishyesque
That is SOOOOOOOOOOO sig worthy! Pure awesomeness to you, sir.

C wut I did thar Fishy?

's UG
#40
Quote by dgme92
Psychology gets mentioned, and you get serious. On the ball, as always my friend.

Most of the passable chat-up lines have already been posted unfortunately, but they are absolutely hilarious


Just try mentioning trade unions, let's see what happens...
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