#3
Nice chords and melody, it's a nice song. When you get to adding to it you should think about putting in a bridge in there somewhere, and maybe mixing up the melody a bit in the second half near the end to build it up a bit
#4
Very nice! Your vocals are very nice, also you didn't strum one single note. Excellent.
I'm really liking this. Keep it coming good.
Tim.

You have entered the Twilight Zone
Beyond this world strange things are known
Use this key, unlock the door
See what your fate might have in store
Come explore your dreams' creation
Enter this world of imagination
#5
That was really good, I enjoyed it. Good melody, good chords and nice singing. And I liked what sounded to me like vocal harmonies. Can't get enough of those, haha.
#6
The chord progressions were nice. Vocals are pretty good, the lyrics are cool. I think the song would be a lot better of there were drums, and it alternated between distortion and acoustic, but that's just me. It could also use a bridge, or a couple more sections, it's kinda boring on it's own. Again, that's just my 2 cents.
OH LAAWDDYY!!!!
#7
I've listened to a couple of your songs in the past, and they were noticably country. They sounded alright but then I'm not too into country... this song however is a little more alternative/folk-ish sounding to me, but the lyrics keep that small country tinge in there. Enjoyable chords/melody. It feels like a lazy river ride but too lazy, like when your float isn't moving in the water at all. I thought it would be cool if you had a shaker and maybe some other aux. percussion in it?
Ibanez AS93
Fender Marauder
Vox Pathfinder 15R
Last edited by derekgray at Jul 10, 2009,
#8
sorry im so late returning your crit.
well i was not expecting this from you after critting my metal song.

its a good song though. guitar is simply and a good base for your lyrics. nothing special by itself but it sounds good!. i like you singing, for folk acoustic stuff, very good and distinctive.
i cant really comment on the lyrics, i rarely listen to any. the phrases by themselves are good, not to cheesy, seem to fit well together.i would add another guitar part, even if it is just playing the same thing, to thicken it up. a good acoustic or clean electric guitar solo would sound really good with this.