#2
Slow down a bit on parts, it was too fast for my liking at many parts. Other parts were too slow.

You've got the general idea down, not bad for a first song, but needs more fluidity and some good catchy verses.
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#3
Feels dis-jointed. There's no structure IMO. Good riffs, but they need to be placed into the song correctly.

And another case of an intro not fitting the song. The intro is supposed to be catchy and give an impression of the song. The intro gave me the idea of calm, but all of a sudden, it's all heavy. Change the intro.

A good example of a calm intro but heavy verses/breakdowns with metalcore is Killswitch Engage's My Curse.

And wrong section. This should be in the Riffs and Recording's section.