#1
The Blood's on Your Hands

All my life I knew it would come to this
One day I'm orchestrating your demise
The next I wish you and I were one
Why can't I ever make up my mind?

I've seen this before
The trees would die
and my will to live
Would just wither away
like all those leaves.

The came a time when I thought
The best for me would be the death of you
All these thoughts choke my mind
Because you're so cute when you're suffocating

So suffocate, suffocate on every breath you take
Suffocate on your reasons
Because you don't deserve another chance
After all, the blood's on your hands.

This is a war you cannot win
This was all over the day it began
I'll gladly take your wings
If you would just promise not to leave

But you would never compromise yourself
I know you more than you could ever imagine
Think about it this way
For a funeral, it's going to be a beautiful day

You can't miss a thing when you're dead
You can't feel a thing when you're six feet under
What are you so worried about?
You're the only one with nothing to lose

Then came a time when I thought
The best for me would be the death of you
All these thoughts choke my mind
Because you're so cute when you're suffocating

So suffocate, suffocate on every breath you take
Suffocate on your reasons
Because you don't deserve another chance
After all, the blood's on your hands.


YOU ARE MINE.
YOU ARE DEAD.
YOU WILL PAY
FOR WHAT YOU DID.

YOU ARE MINE.
YOU ARE DEAD.
YOU WILL PAY
FOR WHAT YOU DID.

SHOUT FOR MERCY
CRY TO STAY ALIVE
TRY TO RUN
AND I WILL CATCH YOU

SHOUT FOR MERCY
CRY TO STAY ALIVE
TRY TO RUN
AND I WILL CATCH YOU

Maybe we could live forever
Maybe we would die together
One day you'll realize
This is all your fault
You're standing there
You're looking so naive
Sitting buried in the sand
With blood on your hands

What if fiction became fact?
What if I thrust this knife into your back?
#2
you kinda build up suspension in a kinda creepy sorta way, like you kinda know someting that we dont know, but then you kinda dont reveal what it is. i kinda feel "dummer" now.
#3
Awesome song with an awesome title. It reminds me a lot of the songs that I typically write. Because it's so similar to what I write myself, I really can't find anything to comment on. Although I'd kinda like to see the motivation for it, I really like the ambiguity of the reasons for the action in it. It's that thought of what prompted the events to unfold the way they did that makes it so readable for me. It's that need to know the whole story that makes it so interesting. Good job bud. Keep it up.
Some people just wanna watch the world burn. Wanna join me when I take my turn to pour the gas, light the match, see your world flip upside down and drop until it's inside out?
#4
It might be confusing because it's part of a concept album my band is writing, about the rise and fall and decay of a relationship. This is about the man justifying killing her, by placing the blame of the failing relationship on her. Thanks for the comments, I'll crit when I'm on my computer instead of my ipod
#5
I love it. The imagery is amazing with the trees. That part is what really grabbed me and pulled me in. What made me keep reading was the "you're so cute when you're suffocating".
What killed it though is the ending in BOLD. I don't think that it kept the same tone from earlier on. But I'm sure it would still fit perfectly with some music. But by themselves...not so much.
I'd give this an 8 out of 10.
Last edited by EnDZYm3 at Jul 11, 2009,
#6
Quote by fu5i0n_101
you kinda build up suspension in a kinda creepy sorta way, like you kinda know someting that we dont know, but then you kinda dont reveal what it is. i kinda feel "dummer" now.


I kinda lol at your use of "kinda."
#7
Yes the capitalized letters are supposed to be much simpler and give a different vibe. Everything that's capitalized is supposed to be screamed, in a similar vein to the "FLIP THE SWITCHHH!" section of Prelude to Pain by The Killing Tree.

That's the moment the man decides to kill her, which explains why it needs to be so tense.