If I look too hard
I find the things that I don't want to see, and
the things that I knew were there all along.
I guess you can't find things that you already
know are there. But I look anyways, to face
my shame I guess, to see the things that
I don't want to see, face myself , face everything
that I thought I lost, or
covered over with myself, but the
edges were showing, the corners lifting,
exposing everything,
I thought I hid, and pretended to forget,
where they were, so I could
make it look like I was busy
finding myself while in fact I was just
portraying an
artist portraying a lie
depicting the truth,
covering another lie,
pretending to be myself
all the while.