#1
So I'm just starting out really and was thinking about starting a band off (big hint: Username) thought I'd post the first song I've written for it, if I managed to get it started.

Death getting closer everyday
people in church praying for twice the pay
look at them, look at you!
no too long til the devil shall have you!
controlling the minds of the ones you love
you are the devil, praying for twice the pay!

fade away fade away
Your on a path of self destruction which you cant control!
No control! No control!
your mind is the devil and the devils you!
He is you!

Auto-Damage!

You have no control, He's got your soul, controlling you
and the ones you love!

Eye balls, strained.
Destruction!! No control!
feel de-ranged, veins pulping in my head!
Think I'm Dead!

Auto-Damage!

Is something you can't control! no control!
we are the devil but the devils you!
out your control!

you'll just have to wait til the devil, he finds you!

Auto-Damage!

Is destroying the ones you love!

Fade away! Fade away!

Life is scattering away, every day!
like ash in wind, be afraid (afraid)
the devil is a coming to you! He is you!
path of self-destruction which you can't control!

Auto-Damage!

Will take your soul, your mind and your body too!
He will have you! take you and the ones you love!
feel afraid! the dangers in your head all these thoughts
will make you wish you were dead!

You brought this onto yourself, with your rightgeous talk and
thoughts of no one else but yourself!

pray for pay!

and hope the devil goes away! It may be your last and final chance!

your already absorbed!
beaten wife
beaten loves
beaten friends... all the ones you love!!! are dead and so are you!
He's inside of you! Auto-Damage has already taken control of you!
liquor, money got the best of you! you are the devil and the devils you!

Auto-Damage!

Is something you can't control! no control!
we are the devil but the devils you!
out your control!

you'll just have to wait til the devil, he already has you!

Auto-Damage!

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That's the full song, I hope you can find some flaws in which I can improve upon and if not, your thoughts would be nice.
#2
Any thoughts? It's meant to be Mettalica-esque I've written up a 2nd version but want to know some thoughts on this one.