TooToughTrenton
Registered User
Join date: May 2009
540 IQ
#1
Hey guys. This is my first pop-core song and I need some feedback on it because I'm starting a pop-core band

One thing to note:

The song does get repetitive but I mean, come on, its partially pop.
Attachments:
Pop song.zip
Veil Of Osiris
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2009
189 IQ
#2
Thanks for the crit.
Not really much to comment on, really. Pretty good. Like you said, it's repetitive and if I were you that would be thing I would fix; I found myself skipping parts that I had already heard.
Maybe you could add some leads (besides just octaves)? I like the idea you're presenting (Pop+Core), but I think it needs to be a bit more interesting than the average pop song, and I think adding some melodic leads could really benefit it.
I think the vocals could really make this song awesome, but right now it's just a 7/10 IMO.
-Flooow
Trivium fanboy
Join date: Feb 2009
433 IQ
#3
totally agree with Veil of Osiris.
I think this song has got a lot of potential and creates just this atmosphere that a good
popcore song must have!
jbridge90
More Ovaltine Please!
Join date: Mar 2008
654 IQ
#5
As I'm listening, the first thing that popped into my head, was at bar 4, I could actually sing, "and music still on MTV", and it would match up with the octaves perfectly. I'm sure it wasn't a conscious thing, but I can definitely hear the Bowling for Soup in your intro. Besides that, not a bad song, except for the blast beat(?) from the 5th-8th measure kind of bugged me, but then again I'm not a huge fan of those to begin with. SO its not a bad song, just kind of simple, and yes repetitive, but hell like you said, its a pop song. Of course vocals could make this song really good.

So 7.5/10 for now

C4C?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=20673195#post20673195
CarlosAlejandro
Registered User
Join date: Apr 2009
516 IQ
#6
Not sounds too bad so, its nice.

About the bar 4 i mean that the track 1 are so fast i guess that it should be more slow, for me. The bars 15 and 16 i think that it needs more speed, sounds bored here. About the 19 , its the chorus? I think so.. the 40 , this breakdown makes me remenber something like " Forever the sickeds kids x ] " But well, i can put you 8/10 .. The song is nice, and have potential but i guess that it needs some work
" Living the world as the music makes me feel "
Last edited by CarlosAlejandro at Jul 12, 2009,
jimmyled
*****es ain't ****
Join date: Apr 2008
783 IQ
#7
To Pop for me. But I liked how you mixed elements of Metal with the Pop. Didn't really like it, but I liked the idea.
C4C? My songs
.Joker.
Registered User
Join date: Jul 2008
410 IQ
#8
It was cool, reminded me of A Day To Remember a bit.
The intro sounded like the intro to the Hannah Montana show though lol. I also agree that you should put some leads in...over top of the chorus, you could still have the octaves doing waht they're doing but add a catchy lead over top. Also in the chorus I dont really like the 3rd bar...it just sounds a bit off...maybe change the chord under the octave or somethin
andrew12398
nom nom nom
Join date: Aug 2006
1,511 IQ
#9
Reminds me of a really low tuned (and slow) Four Year Strong and a band my friend is in.

Try increasing the tempo to 145 and tell me what you think.

7/10 for now.
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Gromlich
Registered User
Join date: Dec 2008
53 IQ
#10
Well kinda boring for me.. sorry this is really one of my favorite genres to tell you the truth, id say try adding a little more "core" if you know what I mean

Also with the breakdowns try a little more then just chugs, like maybe a pitch harmonic or a little lead part

just some ideas 6/10 IMO sorry
Paradox_Empire7
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2009
334 IQ
#11
The intro is the exact same thing as 1985 by bowling for soup. I don't really see the ''core'' in the song. Look at my PopCore Song, and Comment !

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1225485&highlight=PopCore+Song