aceral1715
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2007
527 IQ
#1
This is a song i finished yesterday. I'm planning on adding it to my album (Define) once I'm done tweaking it. I doubt I'll be able to do much for the next week since I'm going to be in India, but I should be able to come on UG once in a while. As always, the mp3 can be opened either by right-clicking and saving the target as or you can open the URL in your media player.

http://www.balasrus.com/vishal/angel's tears.mp3

C4C, just post the link.

EDIT: Check post #5 for the updated version of the song along with the changes from the original.


VERSE 1

The rain falls on the window,
And washes the dust back to the ground.
Children look to the skies from below,
Their gazing eyes, truly spellbound.

CHORUS

As the angel's tears,
Still fall like rain.
Fall down to the Earth below,
And forever leave their stain.

From the heavens above,
They're calling out your name.
Listen to what they're saying,
Cause you'l never hear it again.

VERSE 2

As the light fades,
The night rolls in,
And brings the clouds.

Every lit fire,
gets blown out by the winds,
And then the fun really begins.

CHORUS

As the angel's tears,
Still fall like rain.
Fall down to the Earth below,
And forever leave their stain.

From the heavens above,
They're calling out your name.
Listen to what they're saying,
Cause you'l never hear it again.
Attachments:
Angel's Tears.zip
Last edited by aceral1715 at Jul 24, 2009,
-Flooow
Trivium fanboy
Join date: Feb 2009
433 IQ
#2
christ thats phenomenal.
im not pretty sure about the really low stuff in the acoustic part but the rest does so heavily.
I'm really impressed and would love to hear the outcome once it is recorded.
Like the first thought I had when it came to the chorus " man thats gonna be the first song
of the new Trivium Album " .. dont ask me why the arrangement kinda reminded me of it i guess.

awesome piece of music.
StewieSwan
Decent User
Join date: Feb 2009
5,012 IQ
#3
Awesome.

Intro is great and catch right from the start. Verse is great, no complaints. Chorus progression is very cliche but I'll let it go because it still sounds great. However beat 2 of bar 42 in the first guitar track is a G#-G octave chord and sounds terrible. It repeats in every chorus.
So now the progression and notes are getting a bit stale because they've been repeated so much. Maybe some variation in the post-chorus before going back to the verse?
The acoustic bridge was good but not outstanding. It was a nice break from the rest of the song. The transition back to the chorus was a little rough since there was no reestablishment of tempo.
Guitar solo is great. No complaints here.
Outro....now this is getting just plain boring. I'm really tired of this section by now.
For some perspective on how repetative some of it is, scroll over track 2. It's basically 1 phrase and the chorus.

Don't get me wrong though, I did enjoy the song a lot and I think it's very will written. 8/10.

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1162976
666atheist666
jimmyled
*****es ain't ****
Join date: Apr 2008
783 IQ
#4
Intro was great. Verse was also really nice. Good chorus. Bridge was really amazing, and even though it was long, it wasn't too long. The chorus did fit in here. The riff before the solo was a bit too long. Solo was great, really epic. I think the outro should have started with only bass and drums, and then the rest of the instruments, but whatever. As usual, Amazing.
aceral1715
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2007
527 IQ
#5
Quote by StewieSwan
However beat 2 of bar 42 in the first guitar track is a G#-G octave chord and sounds terrible. It repeats in every chorus.

So now the progression and notes are getting a bit stale because they've been repeated so much. Maybe some variation in the post-chorus before going back to the verse?


Thanks for the crit. I just finished updating the song a bit and I fixed the G#-G octave mistake :P


Quote by jimmyled
I think the outro should have started with only bass and drums, and then the rest of the instruments, but whatever.


Thanks for the idea
I added 8 bars to the start of the outro with just bass and drums which I think works pretty well.

Have a listen to the newer version. I don't have an mp3 for this version yet, but I might soon.
Attachments:
Angel's Tears.zip
Msu_Man04
UG's Twitchy Fella
Join date: Jan 2007
1,811 IQ
#6
Off the bat, pretty dang awesome. The lead riff is awesome. I like how it picks up kinda slowly. I like the verse. The chorus is pretty awesome, too. The harmonized lead [vocals, technically] are awesome. I love the really fast rhythm guitar, it really drives it. Post-chorus was sweet. Verse again, chorus again.

I see a 6/8 bridge coming. Sounds great so far, the acoustic. Sounds a little out of place, but what's there is nice, and the mood fits well. Electric comes back in well, and the choir in pursuit is awesome, but a bit short-lived.

Chorus again.

Pre-solo sounds great, and the solo is awesome. Not TOO fast, like it's dumb. Maybe at one part. The tapping is pretty nice, too. Outro is good, just like the beginning. I like how the end sounds, right at the start, how it lightens up a bit without losing intensity. Love the last chord.

All in all, pretty amazing thing you've got going on here. Loves me some hard-rock, sometimes, but I'd say that's got a little metal in it. It's harder than typical hard-rock.

As for the lyrics... I'm not sure. They seem awful cliche, but whatever you go for. They aren't terrible, but I've read much better. But I like the fact that you even wrote them and put them in the song, like I do. Makes me feel not so alone. XD.

Crit mine? Tired of You, in the sig, is preferred.
Last edited by Msu_Man04 at Jul 25, 2009,
Time Bomb
Grunge Kid
Join date: Feb 2007
649 IQ
#8
Wow, I have to say it sounded pretty ****ing awesome!!
Really loved the intro, really got me going.
In the first verse, the vocals should become a lead over the verse as a guitar, because it sounds awesome. I didn't take it as vocals at all.
The chorus part is catchy as well, I liked it.
The bridge part was awesome, I loved how the drums built up.
Didn't really like the part from 126-139, I think the strings sounded awesome but they don't match the song.
The pre-solo part was awesome, really makes the listener wait for the solo.
The solo itself was ****ing epic, I was amazed when I heard it.
The outro was pretty amazing too, I loved how it went from low to high and then slowed down and ended.
Overall I would give you a 8.5/10 for your awesome work, man.

C&C my metal song if you have some time:

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1165609