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#1
I am not a social person at all. I almost never speak at school and when I do hang out with my friends it's only like once a month for a few hours and always the same people. I'm 18 and starting to get sick of being single. Any suggestions or advice?


EDIT: I am not good at talking to people and meeting new people. I have no interesting things to talk about, and i can't carry a conversation to save my soul.

EDIT2: I am 18 and live in the US I cannot drink and have no access to alcohol in any way shape or form, unless I drink rubbing alcohol.

Also, I am not looking for any typical pit answers. Inb4 icumblood, fap, and rape.
Funny

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Last edited by Andybren8690 at Jul 19, 2009,
#4
You're just shy, it's pretty common.

Seriously, just go out with friends until you feel comfortable enough. Meet new people, blah blah.
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#8
start smoking bud :p
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#10
Get ****faced, meet your alter ego.
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#12
Quote by walkingminstral
start smoking bud :p

This is how I got 'popular' around my school/town.
#13
I'm a bit 'dodgy/shy/whatever' with new people.

It usually takes one of my mates to start conversation with people (although if necessary I can do it on my own), but once I've established contact and started talking to someone, I'm fine.

It's just getting over the initial hurdle of starting a conversation with someone. It's usually a lot easier if something has just happened that you can comment on (train being late/knocking your pint over/anything that can be casually remarked upon to a complete stranger), or of course being drunk - that lowers all the inhibitions to the point of being able to strike up conversation with complete strangers.
#14
Quote by killerscorpion
Your just shy....

It's pretty common...

It got old like the second time.
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#15
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
This is how I got 'popular' around my school/town.



I'm in college, I don't think it would work like that.
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#16
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
This is how I got 'popular' around my school/town.


I was only half joking when I said it, it does actually work
Strange, It seems like a character mutation, Though I have all the means, of bringing you fuckers down, I can't make myself, To destroy upon command, Somehow forgiveness, lets the evil make a loss - Danger Mouse/Sparklehorse/Wayne Coyne
#17
Quote by StewieSwan
It's not your fault. You have Asperger's.

i have that. it does cause social awkwardness, but once you start making friends, you don't stop.
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#18
Quote by BlisteringDDj
Get ****faced, meet your alter ego.

does this actually work?

I friend of mines ex said that when she first met him, he was a pretty smooth talker, but later when I was talking to my friend, he said he was drunk.
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#19
Quote by Andybren8690
I'm in college, I don't think it would work like that.

College is the land of parties. Find one. I've walked into many a party without knowing anyone and left knowning a few more people.
#20
I used to be shy like you. You're not rubbish in social situations. You've created this delusion for yourself as a means of explaining why you don't hang out with people more often.

All I can recommend is trying to make new friends. Give your existing friends a call and tell them to come round to your place for a few drinks or whatever takes your fancy. Tell them to bring some extra friends, preferably ones you don't already know. Then your social circle will grow, without you ever noticing it at first glance.
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#21
Quote by pbiggie
does this actually work?

I friend of mines ex said that when she first met him, he was a pretty smooth talker, but later when I was talking to my friend, he said he was drunk.

Yep. I'm much more sociable and easy to talk to when drunk.
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#22
Just go around to clubs/pubs and meet some people Make sure you are always smiling and look half decent, because who wants to talk to that sad, unkempt guy sitting by himself.

I know that sounds harsh but it's true, if you don't look presentable then no one will want to talk to you. Also, if you play guitar you could just play at a local pub or whatever and then you will definitely make some friends. Or make a band, put an advertisement at you're local music stores and then make friends with the people that join.
a little lost.....
#23
Quote by \m/Angus\m/
College is the land of parties. Find one. I've walked into many a party without knowing anyone and left knowning a few more people.



Community college...not as much fun...
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#24
Drink, I'm completely serious. I'm a really social person and when I drink I'm like mega-social.
#26
Quote by pbiggie
does this actually work?

I friend of mines ex said that when she first met him, he was a pretty smooth talker, but later when I was talking to my friend, he said he was drunk.



It does...

Once I've got a few inside me, I start grinning uncontrollably, and get quite talkative and jolly (am usually quite the miserable bastard), but mainly start grinning
#27
I used to be incredibly shy and still am around people i don't know, especially girls, but just don't be afraid of what people think of the things you say or how you act, if you say or do something stupid, laugh at yourself, make sure you are fun to be around and people will want to be around you more, alcohol helps a little but only in moderation, too much turns you into a burbling moron, and it dosen't help to use it as a crutch.

EDIT:

Quote by Davo Ownz


I know that sounds harsh but it's true, if you don't look presentable then no one will want to talk to you.

This only works for a select few, it works for me somewhat, i think it depends on someones personality, if you have crazy hair, a beard, boring, geeky and uncouth, then no, you are not gonna make many friends, but (this is all according to other people, i don't think this is very true) apparently i come across as:

-intellectual (i'm not really, i am just very articulate compared to most)
-quirky
-witty
-eccentric

People say that it wouldn't be the same without my style, probably because if i straightened my hair, wore polo shirts, all that ****, people would probably think i was gay.
WHOMP

Think of that next time you are not allowed to laugh.
Last edited by donender at Jul 19, 2009,
#28
Quote by donender
I used to be incredibly shy and still am around people i don't know, especially girls, but just don't be afraid of what people think of the things you say or how you act, if you say or do something stupid, laugh at yourself, make sure you are fun to be around and people will want to be around you more, alcohol helps a little but only in moderation, too much turns you into a burbling moron, and it dosen't help to use it as a crutch.
This. Just put yourself into casual social situations, with some friends and some people you don't know very well. I used to be pretty quiet and subdued, but now (although I'm still a man of few words) I'm way better socially. I think something that helps is a little bit of self confidence. Even little things like posture and body language can help you in social situations, as a bit of a confidence booster. I never thought I had confidence issues, but I used to walk hunched over and looking down, and now I walk looking forward with my shoulders back a bit, and I actually think it helps a lot. I'm not sure about crossing your arms or putting your hands in your pockets, but I think they can make you a little more shy too.
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#29
Seriously man, do your friends party at all? You need to start getting drunk and going to parties and stuff thats a good way of meeting new people. Don't try and be a hero and drink a ****ton and throw up all over the place. Don't get so drunk that you start yelling and saying stupid **** and acting like a tool. Just have a good amount, it will relax you. I'm assuming you're a dude... how should I say this... are you kinda normal looking? If so try and single out a girl, maybe make eye contact a few times, give a fake half assed smile towards them, and later after everyone starts getting drunker, go in and start talking to her. Girls like to talk, so ask questions, keep the conversation pinned on them. I usually use drinking games to my advantage... like try and get on the beer pong/beirut table, ask the girl to be your partner and go from there.

But the answer is alcohol and partying as long as you don't do it by yourself you should be fine.
#31
Well, I am short, on the pudgy side, my friends don't party we only hang out when we jam and I AM 18 AND CANNOT AQUIRE ALCOHOL!!!
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#32
Quote by Andybren8690
Well, I am short, on the pudgy side, my friends don't party we only hang out when we jam and I AM 18 AND CANNOT AQUIRE ALCOHOL!!!


I've been acquire alcohol since I was 16. You don't know anyone older than you? Any cousins, siblings, friends that are old enough? What state do you live in? Sometimes you can just go in and try and say you don't have your ID on you. You goto a community college... that kinda sucks... none of your friends drink or goto a college where they live? How do you dress? A lot of this is about confidence too.
#33
Quote by Andybren8690
Well, I am short, on the pudgy side, my friends don't party we only hang out when we jam and I AM 18 AND CANNOT AQUIRE ALCOHOL!!!


Hahaha....

Fail country/state is fail.


18 is the legal age over here in Britannia, and we were going to pubs (albeit complete holes, mostly) when we were 17.
#35
Quote by urbanfox
It does...

Once I've got a few inside me, I start grinning uncontrollably, and get quite talkative and jolly (am usually quite the miserable bastard), but mainly start grinning

Cool! I'll be 18 in a month.
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Call me Paul. I prefer that.
Quote by fretsonfire74
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#37
Overcome your shyness and take risks more often, its really the only way. Logically think about the situation and you'll realize your fears are just stupid and you shouldn't even have them. Sometimes you just gotta say '**** it' and do what you want to do.
#39
I wanna hang out with OP.
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#40
I was the same way, then i went to my college orientation and now I just realized the people in my hometown aren't worth the time of bring friends with
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