#1
Been playing guitar for ages and FINALLY decide to write songs. This is the first one I wrote and was curious as to if it was good or not. I personally think its all right not great but not 100% terrible. hopefully you'll enjoy


Hey their sweet angelic thing
my,my, years have flown by
all in all your number one.
but you wont know

but she knows
but she knows
and she knows

our sixteen years have taught us well
we laugh we cry at secrets tell
you tell me to tell the truth
but I lie well and that's the truth

but she knows
but she knows
and she knows

now it's here our last goodbye
as we smile we'll begin to cry
with three last words I'd love to say
I drop your hand and drift away

but she knows
but she knows
and she knows
#2
Hi! Don't like the second verse. I like the second line of that verse, but the last two seem kind of cliche. That might just be me. I really like the last verse. It might be a little corny, but I really do like it a lot. As a song, I suppose the chorus might work well, I guess this is a softer song? Not bad for a first song!
#3
yeah I was kinda sitting their and did the guitar part for the chorus and though
"hmmmm...I don't think a long chorus would work well" so just went with three words

THANKS!
#4
Hi christopherlayt,

Please take some time and read the rules in the announcement at the top of this forum.
Pay particular attention to the part about titles.
After this thread is closed, you can repost this a new title.

Thanks.


*reported*
Meadows
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