#1
just thinking about it, makes me feel down
i try to hide it, but fall to the ground
used to sing songs of laughter, but now only brings me to tears
when i was young, youd prtect me from my fears

and ill come running, just to see your face again
ill come running to mark the end
and ill pay my final respects
this s your last goodbye, it will be perfect

you went away, i never got to say good byee
andd still i woner, i wonder why
they said they didnt want me to know, but i think i had a right
i look at your picture, and it will help me sleep tonight

and ill come running, just to see your face again
ill come running to mark the end
and ill pay my final respects
this s your last goodbye, it will be perfect


c4c thanks
#2
Quote by the envy
just thinking about it, makes me feel down
i try to hide it, but fall to the ground
used to sing songs of laughter, but now only brings me to tears
when i was young, youd prtect me from my fears

and ill come running, just to see your face again
ill come running to mark the end
and ill pay my final respects
this s your last goodbye, it will be perfect

you went away, i never got to say good byee
andd still i woner, i wonder why
they said they didnt want me to know, but i think i had a right
i look at your picture, and it will help me sleep tonight

and ill come running, just to see your face again
ill come running to mark the end
and ill pay my final respects
this s your last goodbye, it will be perfect


c4c thanks


I like the chorus/2nd and 4th stanza, but I really think you should gather stronger and less obvious rhymes in the intro. Try not to use the verb "falling", it's kind of cliche. Not trying to sound mean or anything, just trying to help .

C4C?

INTOLERANCE IS IGNORANCE


Quote by kosmic
Holy Moses.
haha