#1
I went to write a piece about how much I hated my past and how I'm free of it all and blah, blah, blah.
How I got through it all, this, that, you.
How everything will be better and the future looks so bright.
****.
Off.
Nothing ever has a fairytale ending, especially when you dream for so much.
As far as I know, I'm still at square one.
Falling down a continuous rabbit hole, passing the same twisted chairs and clocks with infinite time readings.
Just let me land, if even on my head.
Good friend of mine one days tells me
"Just spill it all, every emotion or thought, let it flow, your pen being your guide."
So Mitch, here's to you, I'll drink this one down and take my dues.
This ****ing spasm in my back is killing me and it beats harder with every god damn tick.
I'll bite my lip and swallow my pride.
Accept it.
I'm riddled with my skeletons as you are too.
Don't worry your pretty little eyes, dry them softly.
I'm just another textbook case, so forget it.
Hatred and self-loathing, my poison at best.
You are nothing, just go purge some more, you'll feel better by the morning.
This bittersweet addiction chased with self induced starvation.
Just let it be.
Relapse, ****ing relapse. This destruction is almost beautiful.
Shadows of old faces follow me out the door.
As i hear his voice ringing out in my head.
Whispered softly in my ear
Echoing, unable to let it free.
I spent so long, so many nights just holding it all in
smiling falsely, so plastic.
Watched him, bottle after bottle, bringing himself to the ground, lost in his own head among the laughs of his peers.
Surrounded by a crowd of faces, including my so called "love", however I feel alone.
Just fall asleep in this bed of sugarcoat and self perceived lies.
You'll wake to see his face, and quickly lay on that thin smile.
Losing grip fast.
But in a flash, I am alone, for real.
Guess you weren't a good enough placeholder for him. For anyone really.
You are a disappointment to everyone you lay your eyes on.
Put your head down in shame and walk that line.
Blindfold your eyes, and avert the onlookers gaze.
So go on, tear it apart.
Ruin your pretty pale skin.
Riddle it with scars and show them all how ****ing weak you are to yourself.
You will continue to be the crutch to everyone else in your life
You can make everyone else step away from the ledge
but when it its me vs my thoughts, lets just say I'm down for the count.
And finally when I think I've found the light, blinking and signaling for salvation
I can't even navigate it, to carry me out of the tunnel.
I cant even handle that.
Why don't i just demolish something elegant and loved?
Like I tarnish everything else surrounding me.
Forget it.
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
Pause.
Thanks Mitch. I owe you one.


wrote this at like 4 am last night. Its a little more of a personal piece.
blahh i hate not sleeping.
If I don't meet you no more in this world, I'll meet you in the next one and dont be late.

JWU Baking and Pastry '13
Last edited by Neopolitain at Oct 9, 2009,
#2
Except it or accept it?
I think you meant the latter.
I really enjoyed reading this. There were a lot of familiar thoughts and emotions from my own sleepless nights and it reminded me of the way an old friend of mine thinks and writes.
I'd like to read something of yours with a little more focus.
I want Super Saiyan abilities
#3
thanks. wow i never thought anyone would actually comment on this.
It's kind of a very personal piece, it was one of those 4am outbursts.
I'll keep you posted for when i get a piece where i dont ramble for 10 minutes. :0)
If I don't meet you no more in this world, I'll meet you in the next one and dont be late.

JWU Baking and Pastry '13
Last edited by Neopolitain at Oct 9, 2009,
#4
This is actually full of great imagery and ideas. I can't see it being an actual song in its current state though. To me it seems rather sporadic and doesn't flow. But if you put some time into and try to make it into one, this could end up being an extremely good piece.

I love the way you ramble, by the way. Your words are very eloquent. As it is, this piece makes a lovely poem.

If you don't mind I'd appreciate if you could critique my piece
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1211482
Whatever it is you do, DO NOT CLICK HERE! ! it will bring the end of the world upon us all!!!! I swear you click it, and you will end o.O
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Last edited by RuleBreaker at Oct 9, 2009,