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#1
So, I was wondering. When you guys go out with a girl for the first time, do YOU (the guy) pay for everything? If the girl insists, do you let her pay or do you insist back?

I always thought that girls hate it when guys don't let them pay but my friend said that the guy always has to pay.

What do YOU think/do?
#2
of course. if you're a man, you treat your woman. otherwise you're not a man. i would be mortified if a girl i was with had to pay for something.
#3
My 2 cents? Who ever asks the other out on the date pays. Chick or dude.
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#6
Quote by sashki
If you can't decide, have each pay for their own meal.

If she doesn't like that, shove equal rights down her throat.



to hell with equal rights. man = the provider. i am ashamed of myself if a girl im with has to pay for something. im taking HER out on a date, therefore i should treat her to whatever she is having.
#7
Both pays because

1) This isn't the 1950's

2) Paying for her (on the first date) is just like paying for her time, nothing chivalric about it (which I'm sure you're telling yourself it is...)
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#8
depends if you know it's a real date, in that you both are interested. then the guy pays, but within reason. if you take her to an amusement park, for instance, where the tickets are 40 bucks, obviously both can pay, but then again who takes a girl to a ****ing amusement park?
#9
guy pays.....but heres the dilemma....two gay guys go out on a date...who pays?
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#10
Quote by CoreysMonster
, but then again who takes a girl to a ****ing amusement park?



i have... many times. amusement parks with t3h gf is epic.
#11
Quote by Kensai
Both pays because

1) This isn't the 1950's

2) Paying for her (on the first date) is just like paying for her time, nothing chivalric about it (which I'm sure you're telling yourself it is...)

1) it's called manners and being a gentleman, like holding the door open and carrying her bag
2) no it fucking isn't, that's moronic.
#13
I went on a date once. We paid for our own things (uh like $4 on uni movie tickets and some rip off amount on ice cream from some cold stone place. I wanted cheap corner store ice cream, but she didn't). I didn't pay for her and I sure as hell didn't kiss her! (plus we saw Wolverine, that'd be a total mood killer)
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#14
Quote by thedefrockednun
So, I was wondering. When you guys go out with a girl for the first time, do YOU (the guy) pay for everything? If the girl insists, do you let her pay or do you insist back?

I always thought that girls hate it when guys don't let them pay but my friend said that the guy always has to pay.

What do YOU think/do?


I usually go dutch.
#15
I think you should go with the intention of paying, but if she insists on paying, then let her.
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#16
guitar-guy01, awesome question haha.

I guess I'd start paying when I'm older, as I think age kinda is a factor.
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#17
lol I dont really think its stupid to pay on a date. I do it out of politeness really. That is if Im the one who invites them on the date, ya know?

Quote by Lt. Shinysides
i have... many times. amusement parks with t3h gf is epic.


I went on a date with a gay guy to an amusement park.....both of us were too chicken to go on rides so we stayed at the petting zoo and pet the chickens. Not that you asked..im just sharing
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#18
Quote by pbiggie
I think you should go with the intention of paying, but if she insists on paying, then let her.

this
#19
Quote by CoreysMonster
1) it's called manners and being a gentleman, like holding the door open and carrying her bag
2) no it fucking isn't, that's moronic.


1) Equal rights = equal paying, I'm not going to support any economical hypocrisy perpetuated by some silly idea about being a "gentleman".

2) Alot of women I know say they feel very uncomfortable when the guy pays everything. It's because guys are morons thinking they'll attract her either with her money or some sort of monetary dominance. Regardless of how you view it, women often feel it's like you're paying for their time.

If it's a few dates in I don't mind, but first date? No way.

Quote by yellowfrizbee

I went on a date with a gay guy to an amusement park.....both of us were too chicken to go on rides so we stayed at the petting zoo and pet the chickens. Not that you asked..im just sharing


Pet the chicken, is that what you kids call it these days?
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#20
Quote by thedefrockednun
So, I was wondering. When you guys go out with a girl for the first time, do YOU (the guy) pay for everything? If the girl insists, do you let her pay or do you insist back?

I always thought that girls hate it when guys don't let them pay but my friend said that the guy always has to pay.

What do YOU think/do?
First time, you always position yourself to be the one who pays. Never give her the chance. She can't insist, if it's already done.

If she says it isn't fair, tell her she can treat you on your next date. Simple, really.
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#21
Quote by Kensai


Pet the chicken, is that what you kids call it these days?

Lmao depends on what youre getting at . No, in all seriousness we literally sat their talking dirty to the chickens and seducing them in different languages. Thinking back on it, that was weird. I mustve been drunk.
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#22
Quote by Lt. Shinysides
of course. if you're a man, you treat your woman. otherwise you're not a man. i would be mortified if a girl i was with had to pay for something.
This.
#23
Kensai, I respect that opinion, but I disagree with it. First date= guy pays for dinner. Splitting it makes you look cheap.

Granted, this is with Asian girls.
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#24
whoever asked pays for the first date, but the guy doesnt have to pay for EVERY date.
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#25
Quote by yellowfrizbee
My 2 cents? Who ever asks the other out on the date pays. Chick or dude.

this.

which generally tends to mean the guy pays. Thats right, if you take me on a date, I'm ordering the lobster and that 50 y.o red wine with crystal glasses, which I will then proceed to stamp on and make you pay for...

Quote by CoreysMonster
depends if you know it's a real date, in that you both are interested. then the guy pays, but within reason. if you take her to an amusement park, for instance, where the tickets are 40 bucks, obviously both can pay, but then again who takes a girl to a ****ing amusement park?

In this instance, the guy could pay for th ticket in, but the rides should be seperate paying..
also I would LOVE to go to an amusement park for a date. No better test than screaming in your dates ear for extended periods of time.
Last edited by mdwallin at Aug 8, 2009,
#26
Quote by Kensai
1) Equal rights = equal paying, I'm not going to support any economical hypocrisy perpetuated by some silly idea about being a "gentleman".

2) Alot of women I know say they feel very uncomfortable when the guy pays everything. It's because guys are morons thinking they'll attract her either with her money or some sort of monetary dominance. Regardless of how you view it, women often feel it's like you're paying for their time.

If it's a few dates in I don't mind, but first date? No way.


Pet the chicken, is that what you kids call it these days?

I don't see how your arguments fit in with the "first date no way, after that okay" idea. if you're taking a girl out for the first time, you wanna show her you are serious, that you really like her and know how to treat a woman. I mean, if you don't, then obviously you don't pay.
maybe it's because I come from a hispanic family, but that's how i was raised, and that's how I've always been, and not one girl has ever said anything against it. most have even said "wow, none of the guys have ever paid for me or treated me the way you do" and I'm not kidding.

I mean, try taking a spanish girl out, and don't pay. you won't be getting a second date, because it's considered extremely rude to not offer to pay. doesn't mean they're money *****s, it's just manners, especially in the spanish (and mexican) culture.

kids these days...

Quote by Night_Lights
Kensai, I respect that opinion, but I disagree with it. First date= guy pays for dinner. Splitting it makes you look cheap.

Granted, this is with Asian girls.


this is with all girls except certain european countries. northern european culture is weird, and I'm including Germany, Britain, the Netherlands and Belgium in this.
Last edited by CoreysMonster at Aug 8, 2009,
#27
paying for everything seems kind of silly... I mean if you offer to pay for her meal or decide that you should pay for her movie ticket then fine but paying for everything?

wtf man? Are you trying to seem desperate? "please go out with me, i have alot of money and i will always pay and take care of you! even though your the 8th girl i've done this too"

bottomline, be a nice guy. play it by ear. but don't make freshman mistakes.
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#28
Quote by Hart_Attack
paying for everything seems kind of silly... I mean if you offer to pay for her meal or decide that you should pay for her movie ticket then fine but paying for everything?

wtf man? Are you trying to seem desperate? "please go out with me, i have alot of money and i will always pay and take care of you! even though your the 8th girl i've done this too"

bottomline, be a nice guy. play it by ear. but don't make freshman mistakes.

and this.

obviously you're not going to pay for the gas she needs to drive home.
#29
Quote by CoreysMonster
I don't see how your arguments fit in with the "first date no way, after that okay" idea. if you're taking a girl out for the first time, you wanna show her you are serious, that you really like her and know how to treat a woman. I mean, if you don't, then obviously you don't pay.
maybe it's because I come from a hispanic family, but that's how i was raised, and that's how I've always been, and not one girl has ever said anything against it. most have even said "wow, none of the guys have ever paid for me or treated me the way you do" and I'm not kidding.

I mean, try taking a spanish girl out, and don't pay. you won't be getting a second date, because it's considered extremely rude to not offer to pay. doesn't mean they're money *****s, it's just manners, especially in the spanish (and mexican) culture.

kids these days...


this is with all girls except certain european countries. northern european culture is weird, and I'm including Germany, Britain, the Netherlands and Belgium in this.


i too am from the mexican culture and its important to offer, but when they order something huge while all you did was get a glass of water and split an order of free bread (10 points to those who knows that reference) then it seems like your paying way too much if all she's doin' is getting a free meal out of it. now in my culture if you pay then you should atleast get a kiss goodnight, but if your a dick and you pay for everything... well then.... wheres the logic in this?


it says that your located (atleast currently) in germany, how many latinas have you seen there?
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#30
Quote by sashki
If you can't decide, have each pay for their own meal.

If she doesn't like that, shove equal rights down her throat.


No.

What you do, is pay for her meal, and then later shove something else down her throat.
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#31
Quote by yellowfrizbee
Lmao depends on what youre getting at . No, in all seriousness we literally sat their talking dirty to the chickens and seducing them in different languages. Thinking back on it, that was weird. I mustve been drunk.


No kidding?

Quote by Night_Lights
Kensai, I respect that opinion, but I disagree with it. First date= guy pays for dinner. Splitting it makes you look cheap.

Granted, this is with Asian girls.


Splitting it can make you cheap as well as paying for it makes you look like a chavunistic prick who has to pay for his dates.

Quote by CoreysMonster
I don't see how your arguments fit in with the "first date no way, after that okay" idea. if you're taking a girl out for the first time, you wanna show her you are serious, that you really like her and know how to treat a woman. I mean, if you don't, then obviously you don't pay.


Eh... when I go on dates I want to show her I'm a playful guy who's not needy or looking for approval. Girls just wanna have fun, not some elongated process of decades old chivalric ideas of how to entertain a girl.

Quote by CoreysMonster
maybe it's because I come from a hispanic family, but that's how i was raised, and that's how I've always been, and not one girl has ever said anything against it. most have even said "wow, none of the guys have ever paid for me or treated me the way you do" and I'm not kidding.


Probably. Try taking out a girl who's being hit on and asked out all the time with guys that pays everything she does. Then see what's going to affect her most: Paying like all the other guys who want to place her on a piedestal or not paying and actually treat her like a normal person.

Quote by CoreysMonster
I mean, try taking a spanish girl out, and don't pay. you won't be getting a second date, because it's considered extremely rude to not offer to pay. doesn't mean they're money *****s, it's just manners, especially in the spanish (and mexican) culture.


I don't see at all why I'd be going out with a girl who won't go out with me again if I didn't pay for everything...
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#32
I always offer, but the last girl I was out with really hates when other people buy things or pay for her so hey.
#33
Quote by Hart_Attack
paying for everything seems kind of silly... I mean if you offer to pay for her meal or decide that you should pay for her movie ticket then fine but paying for everything?
Yep.

Quote by Hart_Attack
wtf man? Are you trying to seem desperate? "please go out with me, i have alot of money and i will always pay and take care of you! even though your the 8th girl i've done this too"
Nope.

Quote by Hart_Attack
bottomline, be a nice guy. play it by ear.
Play nothing by ear when it comes to who pays on the first date.

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but don't make freshman mistakes.
Don't make stupid mistakes. Read my first post in this thread.
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#34
Quote by Kensai
*arguments*

see you see it as a money thing, but that's not the point. it's not about the amount of money or being the girl's doormat, it's just about being polite. i mean, if your going to the mall with a girl, and she's carrying tons of bags, are you gonna say "yeah you bought it, you carry it"?
#35
Quote by Hart_Attack
i too am from the mexican culture and its important to offer, but when they order something huge while all you did was get a glass of water and split an order of free bread (10 points to those who knows that reference) then it seems like your paying way too much if all she's doin' is getting a free meal out of it. now in my culture if you pay then you should atleast get a kiss goodnight, but if your a dick and you pay for everything... well then.... wheres the logic in this?


it says that your located (atleast currently) in germany, how many latinas have you seen there?

is bread free?

yeah

WE'LL SPLIT AN ORDER

wooop woop woop


futurama, of course. and next to no latinas here, but tons of turkish women, who are like latinas with big noses and even more crazy fathers -.-
arabian women are ****ing difficult to date because of their fathers constantly looking like they want to kill you.
#36
Quote by CoreysMonster
see you see it as a money thing, but that's not the point. it's not about the amount of money or being the girl's doormat, it's just about being polite. i mean, if your going to the mall with a girl, and she's carrying tons of bags, are you gonna say "yeah you bought it, you carry it"?


Let me make this clear: To you it's not a money thing. To pretty much everyone else it is. You call it being polite, she calls it you buying her time. It means different things depending on whos view you're viewing it from. And alot of girls have the latter view...

And I don't go to the mall with girls who buys "tons of bags". They do that with their girlfriends, I'm a man.
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#37
Quote by CoreysMonster
see you see it as a money thing, but that's not the point. it's not about the amount of money or being the girl's doormat, it's just about being polite. i mean, if your going to the mall with a girl, and she's carrying tons of bags, are you gonna say "yeah you bought it, you carry it"?


Gotta admit though, there are some stereotypical roles involved with the whole male paying thing. Though personally, I'm for men paying on the first date. Maybe third date go dutch?
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#38
Quote by CoreysMonster
see you see it as a money thing, but that's not the point. it's not about the amount of money or being the girl's doormat, it's just about being polite. i mean, if your going to the mall with a girl, and she's carrying tons of bags, are you gonna say "yeah you bought it, you carry it"?


in my last relationship... yeah i would.

i'm sorry to say but buying 3 different pairs of shoes and two different types of dresses may seem like a good idea to her but to me means that i could have gotten an oil change and a tune up on my car. which i can drive home. all those clothes and shoes make no sense to me, so as far that goes being a gentleman is a must but how much is too much when they start to take advantage.

NOW THATS AN ARUGEMENT WORTH HAVING
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#39
Quote by Kensai
Both pays because

1) This isn't the 1950's

2) Paying for her (on the first date) is just like paying for her time, nothing chivalric about it (which I'm sure you're telling yourself it is...)

This.
#40
Quote by jesusgonewrong
Gotta admit though, there are some stereotypical roles involved with the whole male paying thing. Though personally, I'm for men paying on the first date. Maybe third date go dutch?
ew. I suppose you could, but that's tacky, imho. When it's time to let her pay, let her pay for the whole night.
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