#2
what kind of vocals were you planning on putting over it?
im liking what are here as of now
but the vocals will help me put a better image in my head
#3
There's some concept lyrics in the lyrics tab under score information...

Over the bar that sound like 2-9 I'm really not sure, however I know I want some there . Bars that sound like 9 - 17 starts with "The fear of aging..." probably in a death growling vocal style, not like Dying Fetus, but more like Insomnium. It's hard to describe how the lyrics fit over it, its sang fairly slowly, "The fear of aging overpower any need for growth" takes up bars 10 -13.


The Chorus (Bars like 18-25), will probably be screamed, not very intensely mind you. The chorus is the "Standing on the edge..." part, imagine it going like this:

Standing on the edge of some
(bigchord)-------(bigc)----------
some crazy cliff,
(bigc)-(little guitar fill)
I'd be the Catcher in the Rye,
(bigc)------bigchord)-----10-8---

Big Chord stands for the 4 note chords played on track one, the first one being on "Standing". Little guitar fill is the part is the second part of bar 19. "10--8--" is the end of the chorus, imagine "Ryeeeeee" being screamed over top. the 10 and 8 are the frets on the g string at the end of the chorus.

Hope this helps a bit.
#4
Bars 1-9 were excellent and flowed very well, I enjoyed it even with the one guitar playing it but your harmony made it even better, very nice section here. Bars 10-17 didn't really work quite as well for me by themselves, but I'm sure if you're planning on putting vocals over this section then it'd work out quite a bit better. I'm not so sure how to explain why I don't like it too much, the riff itself is good but the rhythm just feels sort of strange.

However, bars 18-33 were very good and definitely my favorite part of the song so far. I like how you slowed things down a bit here and got a very melodic sound. Also, your lead at measure 26 was great and flows with the rhythm under it very nicely. Also, I know I haven't brought it up yet, but your basslines also work very well with what the guitars are doing, very good section.

Your acoustic section at the end of the song sort of came in a bit randomly in my opinion. I mean I like the part itself but the transition into it just felt a bit odd. It's actually a nice way to end the song, I'd just sort of work on the transition, but then again, maybe it's just the guitar pro.

Very nice song overall.

C4C? - https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1177715
#5
intro melody could use some backing piano, if you could handle it.
then a Dm Vamp of Strings kicking off that first riff.
Genre loyalty to the song could make that undesirable.
Starting at bar10 the riffs are classically scary.
bar 18 - 25 setup section nothing to surprising, a good verse, moving on.
The solo/harmony is catchy, good bends, back into that sweet tremolo riff again.
I think the transition to the acoustic part is fine, but in bar 67 I would of put the down strumming on all the guitars and I would of used the slowest note setting for that, but that's just me.
Overall - 8.2/10

C4C?
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