#1
Hey pit,

Was just wasting some time on FML when I came across this one:

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML




Aside from finding this f*cking hilarious it made me wonder if the pit had anything similar to share?

(Yes I am aware that 99.9% of the pit are virgins, but it doesn't have to be about you does it)
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
#3
I got my girlfriend to dress up like Misty and say, "pika, pika, pikachu," during sex once.

No one can top me. No one.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#4
not a fml thread again
they are worse then some fail shoop threads
Quote by frankv
Tokio Hotel is probably the worst thing Germany has produced since WW2.


#5
Quote by Jack Off Jill
I got my girlfriend to dress up like Misty and say, "pika, pika, pikachu," during sex once.

No one can top me. No one.


#6
Quote by DieGarbageMan
I gag my women, that way they cannot scream rape.

It's not rape if you yell "Surprise!" or "Happy Birthday!"
daytripper75

Bullieve


Quote by Amuro Jay
I'm gonna need specific instructions again on how to properly dance with my pants on my head.
Quote by lolmnt
First you put your pants on your head.
Second you dance.
Third you wipe off all the pussy.
#8
Quote by JayT44
It's not rape if you yell "Surprise!" or "Happy Birthday!"


this=win.
Member Of The Australia FTW! Club. PM Alter-Bridge or The_Random_Hero to join. Australians only.

I Play the Bagpipes.

they actually are a pleasant instrument.
#9
Quote by Jack Off Jill
I got my girlfriend to dress up like Misty and say, "pika, pika, pikachu," during sex once.

No one can top me. No one.


Why don't I believe a word of this? lol....
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
#10
Quote by cm261
Why don't I believe a word of this? lol....

Probably because it's total BS.


Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#11
Quote by Jack Off Jill
I got my girlfriend to dress up like Misty and say, "pika, pika, pikachu," during sex once.

No one can top me. No one.

I'm not your girlfriend!!!!!! I told you not to tell anyone about that, especially not teh pit.... we're over.
Quote by ultimatedaver
We're just trying to help man, cause it doesn't seem like you can get any pizza.
#12
Quote by thanksgiving
Probably because it's total BS.
Quote by cm261
Why don't I believe a word of this? lol....


I love you, too, sweethearts. Posted with permission.

Edit: And now it's removed.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
Last edited by Jack Off Jill at Aug 11, 2009,
#13
Quote by Jack Off Jill
(Invalid img)

I love you, too, sweethearts. Posted with permission.


Errrr.... so?
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
#14
Refresh the page.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#15
No I've seen the pic, I just don't see what it proves lol
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
#16
Quote by cm261
No I've seen the pic, I just don't see what it proves lol

Well, I can't prove that she said pikachu. But I can prove that she dressed like Misty for teh sex.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#17
Just looks like some random girl with bad fashion sense to me. I'm obviously not a big enough pokemon fan

Edit: Also if that rle is your woman then might I suggest that you remove her picture from the pit, unless you want some 14 year old kid to print it off, fap all over it, and send it to you in the mail. Or has that been your plan all along?
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
Last edited by cm261 at Aug 11, 2009,
#18
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Well, I can't prove that she said pikachu. But I can prove that she dressed like Misty for teh sex.


Obviously for proof we need you to make a video next time you get teh sexeh time.

This is Larry The If you click him, he will give you magic powers.
srsly.


If you are not willing to die for the perfect s'more, Then you don't deserve a s'more at all.
#20
Quote by cm261
Just looks like some random girl with bad fashion sense to me. I'm obviously not a big enough pokemon fan

Edit: Also if that rle is your woman then might I suggest that you remove her picture from the pit, unless you want some 14 year old kid to print it off, fap all over it, and send it to you on the mail. Is has that been your plan all along?

Neither of us cares. I had a point to prove. My e-honor was on the line. She understands.

She doesn't have her hair in the side ponytail in that one, though.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#21
Quote by Jack Off Jill
There is one on her camera, I think. Unless she deleted it.


Please do NOT post that
Quote by bodyheatseeker
That is simultaneously brilliant and obscene. I honestly don't know if I despise, or admire you.

Quote by Scutchington
If I had room, I would sig that entire post.


basschat.co.uk
#22
Quote by cm261
Please do NOT post that

I wasn't going to.
Quote by wizards?
I had a girl scream, "Oh Batman!" when she came... I didn't exactly know what to say after that.

I would have gotten it up immediately, and been ready for round two.

Vintage X Metal and I have plans to dress up like the Joker and Harley Quinn when we finally express our desires for one another. She'll find this when she searches her name, too. And she'll get excited with the prospect.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#23
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Neither of us cares. I had a point to prove. My e-honor was on the line. She understands.

She doesn't have her hair in the side ponytail in that one, though.

Glad you took down that comment, you would have been mauled in here by, "PM PM PM!!!"

And ladies and gentleman, this man is visual and hard undeniable evidence that you NEVER overlook a geek girl. I miss having a geek girl
#24
Quote by wizards?
Glad you took down that comment, you would have been mauled in here by, "PM PM PM!!!"

And ladies and gentleman, this man is visual and hard undeniable evidence that you NEVER overlook a geek girl. I miss having a geek girl

Aww, Wizards?, I know you're down, buddy. I saw a few threads in which you've mentioned it. It's okay, you don't need her. She's not geeky enough for the likes of you. You can get geekier, hotter, and less bitchy. You'll see! Your next geeky girl is right around the corner, my friend. How about you and I go to a comic book shop and go pick up women? I guarantee we'll be the best looking guys in the place.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#25
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Aww, Wizards?, I know you're down, buddy. I saw a few threads in which you've mentioned it. It's okay, you don't need her. She's not geeky enough for the likes of you. You can get geekier, hotter, and less bitchy. You'll see! Your next geeky girl is right around the corner, my friend. How about you and I go to a comic book shop and go pick up women? I guarantee we'll be the best looking guys in the place.

Is it sad that I've been seriously considering doing this since I was about thirteen? What can I say, I had a crush on the girl at Games by James... She always let me play all the newest games with her, gave me a discount one time when I didn't have enough money to buy something, she was seriously the coolest person I've ever met. I go in there now, see her with a wedding ring, a little bit of me dies each time.

What I just said is actually 100% true. I think I'm hooked on those geek pheromones.
#26
Quote by wizards?
Is it sad that I've been seriously considering doing this since I was about thirteen? What can I say, I had a crush on the girl at Games by James... She always let me play all the newest games with her, gave me a discount one time when I didn't have enough money to buy something, she was seriously the coolest person I've ever met. I go in there now, see her with a wedding ring, a little bit of me dies each time.

What I just said is actually 100% true. I think I'm hooked on those geek pheromones.

I know how you feel, my friend. Just the idea that a girl will sit there and listen to me rattle on and on about black and white monster movies/sci fi moviese, and will watch them with me.. Gets me all hot and bothered.

Married, huh? Here's what you do. Kill him. Console her. With a game console.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#27
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Neither of us cares. I had a point to prove. My e-honor was on the line. She understands.

She doesn't have her hair in the side ponytail in that one, though.

I seem to have missed the picture... PM it to me and I shall bow down to your superiority.


Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#28
Quote by Jack Off Jill

Married, huh? Here's what you do. Kill him. Console her. With a game console.

I'll just tell her she can come over and play with my Wii anytime she wants
I'm serious, I've got like all the games you'd ever want to play.
#29
Quote by thanksgiving
I seem to have missed the picture... PM it to me and I shall bow down to your superiority.

That's alright.
Quote by wizards?
I'll just tell her she can come over and play with my Wii anytime she wants
I'm serious, I've got like all the games you'd ever want to play.

I laughed really hard when I read this. Show her your Batman pajamas that you had your grandma make for you.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
Last edited by Jack Off Jill at Aug 11, 2009,