#1
So, I was sitting in my room farting like it's going out of fashion when I realised that I needed to take a dump. So, armed with a magazine and some bog roll I walked down the corridor to the toilet.

As I sit down and open fire, so to speak, I notice a mosquito buzzing around the bathroom. It's signature whine sure to really really get on my nerves.

"It's alright," I think aloud. "It's on the other side of the room. You'll be done by the time it's over here."

I was wrong.

As soon as I started, it made a beeline towards me.
"I'm not having any of that." I thought and I squeezed out a huge fart just as the mosquito buzzed towards me.

As the ground shaking flactulance left my body, a moment of silence fell between me and the mosquito.
You always love your own brand and as the signature smell wafted across the room towards the faltering insect, it dropped dead. There and then.

I have been informed the bathroom now smells like a dead goat.

TL;DR - I killed a mosquito with my fart and now the bathroom smells.
<--- This is Wally. Not Waldo.

Gear List:
Ibanez RG570
Fender MIA Strat (in black, HSS)
Godawful Marshall MG practice amp

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#5
"Most people are trying to simplify the world. We're definitely here to complicate it." - Dad
Quote by RocksAwakening5
I you for posting this.

<-- Pretty much sums me up

8/7/09


^ I was there