#2
your acoustic tone could be alot better. it's too muddy. vocals were again pretty ok, but they could definitely sound better with some reverb and eqing. i like the guitar riff. very chill. your vocals could have a better tone for this. yours are rather clean, and this need's something more husky and gritty. i'm sure you'll get there soon. keep writing and the exact vocal tones will follow.


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#3
I really like your idea here. How many tracks did you record this in? I ask because your vocals are really hidden by your guitar (we'll get to that in a bit), which is indicating to me that you did this out of one mic, in one track. I'd suggest going back and micing yourself singing and micing the guitar separately. This way you can simply turn on the volume level on your vox (and maybe add a touch of reverb, but i'd have to hear how your recording turned out before I said that) to make it shine through.
As for your guitar, I'd go through and re record that to be honest. It sounds like you messed up a couple times, and I dont really think its much of a good idea to put out tunes that arent completely as perfect as you can get them. I'd also add just the tiniest bit of saturation to it to add some warm growl, but not to the point where its aggressive, just to give it some life and body. I might also add some reverb to that, but I'd take that with a grain of salt and it might not work, I'd have to try it out myself.
As for the music itself, I think its some alright songwriting. I'm a fan of this kind of music, but not on a level where I can intelligently critique it, so I'll leave it to people who know more about it than I do.

Obviously take what I said with a grain of salt, because every situation is different, but keep on doing what you're doing because it sounds like it has a lot of potential.
#4
I like the tone of the guitar actually. It could use a bit of reverb, however. It lacks power. Your vocals are also too quiet. I can't hear them without listening really closely. The vocal melody is pretty good though. I liked when you took it down around the 2 minute mark. It's great to have dynamics in music. You don't hear that much nowadays. Your singing is pretty good. A little pitchy here and there, but overall not bad. Your higher notes seem like they're a bit of a strain for you. Maybe you should start doing some voice exercises to increase your range before recording. I'm now 4 minutes in and it's starting to drag on a bit. Outro was nice. I really liked the natural harmonics.


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#5
You have a great voice, but it's hidden by your guitar a bit.
Like StewieSwan said, the guitar lacks power ,so try to record the guitar and the vocals separately.
You're very talented, keep up the good work.
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Last edited by Waffleguy at Aug 15, 2009,
#6
Thanks alot guys. I know my voice isn't the best, but I'm fine with it.

And yea, everything was recorded in one take on one mic, so mic placement essentially defined the tone of everything which sucked.
I'll be downloading some kind of multi-track deal here soon. Thanks alot again.
Pot
Kettle
Black
#7
cool man. i liked the tuning. youre like you said, youre vocals arent great but they get the job done. youre better then bob dylan at singing. good job. the lyrics were good. this was gritty and had a raw feel to it that i liked. this reminded me of huckleberry fin for some reason. the song seems to get a little bit long but otherwise its great. i love the verse chords/riff thing. this is good coffee house music. nice job!

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