#1
I had another thread for this one before I completed it, but now that I've finished writing the lyrics and composing the vocal melody, I thought it might be better to give it a new thread. All crit is welcome, and as always, C4C, so just leave the link


EDIT: See post # 3


VERSE 1

Close your eyes,
And keep your dreams disguised from the sun,
Cuz once it sets,
A new beginning will have begun. (oh oh)

Take what you need,
But take nothing more,
Cuz once fate comes a'callin,
You're the only soldier in your war.


INTERLUDE


VERSE 2

Follow the signs,
And you'll keep your fire alight in the dark.
(Guitar riff)
Pick the right fights,
And you'll have won before you start.


CHORUS

Oh you can watch the sun,
Go over the horizon,
But you always know,
It's gonna be back again.

And it's gonna bring an end,
To your nightmares,
And it'll show you,
How to transcend,

All these ideas,
The world's put in your head,
All those words,
You wished that you hadn't said.

And all those doubts,
That you've been breeding,
And it'll open the way,
To new beginnings. (Oh oh)


VERSE 3

Tell me what's impossible,
And I'll prove you wrong. (Oh oh)
Tell me what you think of me,
And I'll tell you where you belong.

The only thing to know,
About this life that you're living,
Is that it's all about Sunsets,
And New Beginnings.


CHORUS


BRIDGE

And there's no way,
You can avoid it.
It's the,
Truth.

And there's no way,
You can deny it.
It's the,
Truth.


GUITAR SOLO


COMPRESSED CHORUS


Oh you can watch the sun,
Go over the horizon,
But you always know,
It's gonna be back again.

And it's gonna bring an end,
To your nightmares,
And it'll show you,
How to transcend,


CHORUS


OUTRO CHORUS
Last edited by aceral1715 at Aug 22, 2009,
#2
I love the song. It sounds very well made and thought out. Its not fast or slow just perfect looks like it would be very fun to play.
#4
Just started the song, already love it. When the vocals came in, nothing else more to say than "wow". Love your lyrics. You are MUCH better than me in that area .

When the chorus first came in, I also came in. My pants.

Adored the bridge.

The solo just fit in. It was powerful and was awesome, especially the tapping part.

The outro... I dunno. It seems to have brought me to the past, which is what I aim for in my songs (in other words, very good).

Overall, I loved it. But I'm not hard to satisfy.

10/10.

C4C? Link in sig.

I'd like a crit on the song "Welcome to my World".
You are now using UG Black.
You are now using UG Classic.


Listening to: New York Voices, as well as the new Vulfpeck record (fuck it's so good)


You throw like a girl. A girl who is great at baseball and has a fiery passion for the sport.
Last edited by Wolfinator-x at Aug 22, 2009,
#5
Heres my crit

Strings- I like it very cool
Symphonic Rockitude-very cool I like the effect of all the strings ringing very cool\
Verse- very awesome an groovy riff, i like the vocal part...
Interlude- nice break from the awesomness...
Verse 2- same as above
Chorus-Very beautiful, i love it, i also like the drums
Bar 76 is cool, i just cant get over how awesome the chorus is...
Bridge-i like it, the vocals is what makes it stand out
Solo- very good solo, although i didnt like the tapping, it just didnt sound right to me...
Outro- i love it, i love the slow down...very cool

Overall...i loved it very cool....8/10

C4C? Its song 11 in my sig, if you have the time...thanks
#6
Very good, I liked just about everything, but didn't really love any of it except for the solo.
Okay, first off, when the era of rock started, did the ability to play anything on strings other then slowly fading in chords vanish?! I'm tired of seeing EVERY single string part nowadays being like... Some swelling chords and then nothing, no melodies, wheres the string solos?! Anyways, no more rant about that >_>

The rest of your song was good, the chorus being my fave part, the vocal melodies are top-notch and really make the song. However, another complaint is that theres no tension and release, for example, no dissonant notes. No rhythmic changes etc. I would've liked to see some tension and release and possibly an up/down tempo part. Also, maybe scrap the string intro and work out some piano stuff for the intro? IMO piano fits better then rock then strings. Especially seeing as how it seems to be impossible to make good string parts today.

Anyways... 7/10. Good, but needs improvement.

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1180216 - C4C, my song.
#7
I tried to check your song but 9 tracks are too much for my CPU. Do you have some trick or something to lower the CPU need? The sound distorts heavily at bar 9.

I like the lyrics. Especially the 2nd part of verse 3, people should learn from its meaning.
#8
Quote by atira
I tried to check your song but 9 tracks are too much for my CPU. Do you have some trick or something to lower the CPU need? The sound distorts heavily at bar 9.

I like the lyrics. Especially the 2nd part of verse 3, people should learn from its meaning.


Thanks

I could give you a MIDI version, but the chorus and most of the song get really messed up in there.
#9
Ringing out riff at bar 9 in awesome. cant say i really like the verse. kinda feels lacking. chorus is awesome. and epic. i love the rhythm guitar in the bridge. works very well and reminds me of coheed. guitar solo is very good. not wanky but still sounds good. not too much to crit on since the riffs were repeated alot. but i liked most of what i heard.

c4C?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1186104
#10
that was pretty sweet, most of the time

I really liked the melodic-ness of the whole thing, its was very pleasing to my ears, nothing actually sounded "bad" but it seems some things could easily be changed to make them better. Some tracks seemed to serve little to no purpose. And, i don't really like the "let rings" during the verses, and don't really hate them, but they just started getting messy. I really liked your chorus, and the solos (so don't change those )

pretty sweet, still has potential, 8/10