#1
ok so my gf's grandmother just passed away, I've bought two condolence cards, one for my gf, her mother and brothers and I got one for her father (who lives seperately, it's his mother who passed away), I'm not exactly super close to any of them, (well ok, obviously im cloes with my gf) but i do know her family farely well and see them quite often. I never knew her grandmother but from the sounds of it she was a great person, very loving and kind, great sense of humor.

For my gf's family card, it says a whole ''as you share this time of sorrow with your family... with sympathy...'' just a general condolence message that expresses itself to a family.
For her father's card, is says ''with sympathy, in the loss of your mother... may her life be honored, her memories cherished...'' (i am being brief, im not gonna write in detail what they say)

I need help though, I've never done this before, this whole sympathies, condolences thing, I just want to make sure I do it right. I'm just looking to write a line or two at the bottom of the messages (different words for each), something not too specific because i never knew her, but something respectful and truly sympathetic and i'm trying to avoid something plain and regular...

for the family card, Im thinking something like ''My deepest sympathies, may you forever cherish memories of her (or her memories? idk)'' maybe the whole forever cherish thing is abit too much, really i need abit of direction here, i dont know what condolence cards are supposed to really say.

and for her father's card i'm thinking maybe like ''My condolences, may she always be in your heart and thoughts, may she rest in peace'' maybe abit too cheap with the whole ''may she...may she...''? and im not sure about the ''rest in peace'' perhaps slightly explicit?

any guidance would be fantastic, thanks much

(sorry for the wall of text)
Last edited by metalblaster at Aug 24, 2009,
#4
Quote by kalnoky7
condolence cards always sounded like a wrong approach to me...
but that's just me


well i've sort of told her brothers and mother that im sorry for their loss, its just some of them i dont see and some of them i do, shes got three brothers and theyre a pretty active-alwaysdoingstuff family so, yeah. i just figured its a good way to make it official and lasting.
#6
Quote by Levi79
Dude, not something you ask in the pit. I can right now guarantee your going to get some pretty heartless comments.


i tend to ignore the dumbass comments of 14 yr olds, im able to differentiate between immature idiots and people who are able to keep somewhat of a serious attention span
#8
Cum Blood all over the cards.



But seriously, write something original and from the heart, get in touch with your inner spirituality.
❝Don't be afraid of death, but of an inadequate life❞
Bertolt Bretcht


#9
Quote by ColdNovembeRain
"I know you're struggling with many things right now. Don't let your inheritance disbursement be one of them. For the low fee of 499.95, I will invest your inheritance in the growing pufferfish market!"


like this^

this would be something i'd ignore...

although its kindof ironic at the moment because technically speaking i didnt ignore this one, but you catch my drift
#11
Quote by metalblaster
only now do i realise how thoughtlessly screwed i am, i really got no ideas
I know my comment didnt help whatsoever but i wouldn't know what to write in such things...

condolence cards seem... uncomfortable to me somehow...

rl conversation > all rest but for me a phonecall would be better.

and i cant really help you with what to write cause if i found myself in that situation i'd be in just as much trouble as you
#12
Quote by metalblaster
only now do i realise how thoughtlessly screwed i am, i really got no ideas


hey, relax guy.
#13
Quote by metalblaster
only now do i realise how thoughtlessly screwed i am, i really got no ideas


Here's what you do:
Offer your condolences face to face, hugs, handshakes etc.
Tell them you're there if they need you (which you are going to have to be)
And give them a card that does both of the above, and maybe say how nice the person was (if you knew them well enough)

The Card will be a reminder that you offered your condolance and that they have support and will show there's someone who cares.


Edit : I'm usually the guy that doesn't know how to react to a death, I kinda get awkward, but the above is how I feel the situation should be handled..
Good Luck, and try to help your GF cope
❝Don't be afraid of death, but of an inadequate life❞
Bertolt Bretcht


Last edited by KirkMetallica at Aug 24, 2009,
#15
Seriously, though, just write something like "I'm here to support you guys in any way I can." Drop a 10 or a 20 or whatever in it and bring a pre-made dinner dish like a casserole or something. It's what we generally do in here in Iowa.