#1
Hi guys, i'm the songwriter from the rockband restock. I come from switzerland and english is not the usual language there. So, please have a look at this song and tell me if there are some gramatical or other faults.


Time to remember

I look down on a baby which is crying all the time
it never makes a happy face and is waiting for his pime

I look down on a boy who stands always alone
he thinks he's not more valuable than a stone

I look down on a teen who has started to play guitar
he looks as satisfied as he sees his future so far

At the end I look down on a man
This is me now and I look back at the time it began

It's time
It's time to remember

(Bridge)

(Solo 1)

Thousands of memories are piling up in my head
and I recognize now that I could be already dead

No stop to think about it, please turn back the past
It's really hard to see this pictures again so fast

I feel again the same old sadness like in the old times
Hear around my bed the same old chimes

It's too much for me every single day comes up again
Every single person every single girl I love you Joanne!!!

It's time
It's time to remember
#2
Quote by roman1435
Hi guys, i'm the songwriter from the rockband restock. I come from switzerland and english is not the usual language there. So, please have a look at this song and tell me if there are some gramatical or other faults.


Time to remember

I look down on a baby who/which (don't know) is crying all the time
it never makes a happy face and is waiting for his pime <<< have no clue what that means...

I look down on a boy who always stands alone
he thinks he's not worth more than a stone

I look down on a teen who has started to play guitar
he looks as satisfied as he sees his future so far huh???

At the end I look down on a man
This is me now and I look back at the time it began

It's time
It's time to remember

(Bridge)

(Solo 1)

Thousands of memories are piling up in my head
and I now understand that I could already be dead

Not stopping to think about it, please wind back the past <<< i think thats what you mean...
It's really hard to see these pictures again so fast

Again I feel the same old sadness of the old times
Hear around my bed the same old chimes <<<?????

It's too much for me, every single day comes up again
Every single person every single girl I love you Joanne!!!

It's time
It's time to remember



Pretty much fixed I guess, has some weird words though that I don't know (English is not my main language either).
#3
I think that you should keep in mind that not every line has to rhyme. If you look at a lot of songs, there are a lot of parts that rhyme, but a lot of times they won't.

Pime? Do you mean prime? Or...I don't know. Pime really isn't a word.

Take the suggestions from koen, but it would do you a lot to change some of the rhymes.

ex. old times...chimes
It's just unnecessary. Say what you mean, and more often than not, it'll sound better.
#4
Thank you guys...

...it's really difficult for me to write about feelings and something like that...straight rock'n roll songs are easier to write...

in songs like that i've got to translate some words in a online-machine and very often it's not the correct word i use...
#6
Quote by KidCanary
Why are you writing lyrics in English, anyway?


I hate german lyrics...i mean there are bands like Rammstein which know how to use the german language in their music...
But we play rock'n roll like ac/dc or airbourne and this kind of music has always to be in english!!!