#1
This wacky situation involves three people, I'll call them J, R, and C. I've been best friends with this guy J since I was 5. J has been dating a girl we went to high school with, R, for four years, and even intends on proposing to her within the next year (me and him are 19, said girls are 18). C, is a girl I've been into for about a year, and happens to be R's best friend.

Now my friend has known I've wanted C for a while, and I just found out a week ago, from a drunken C (who I've been trapped in the "friend zone" with) that she had sex with J at a party I had a couple of weeks ago.

Now here's where I need advice. Am I morally obligated to tell R that J ****ed her best friend. Here's what I've been thinking...

Defense for TELLING her:
-He's supposed to be my friend, and he still ****ed a girl I was into, which is reason enough to "ruin his life" by telling R.
-C has been hanging out with me a lot and almost seemingly "leading me on" about being into me, and is definitely just a bitch for sleeping with her best friend's boyfriend
-I've sort of become friends with R, just by affiliation, but we don't really hang out often...still friends though.

Now it would seem obvious that would be the correct choice, HOWEVER...

Defense AGAINST telling her:
-It would essentially ruin the rest of her, C, and J's college semester, and C and R are both freshman. This is especially ****ty since R expressed to me that she's glad she's dorming with C because she's having a lot of trouble fitting in and being away from home.
-All parties involved would despise me in the end (R would be pissed, because I've known J was cheating on her, BEFORE he cheated on her with C)
-It would cause a general wave of teenage drama my way, which I hate more than anything


So, am I morally obligated to tell this girl what's happening, or is it none of my business and I should just leave it alone?
#2
tc;du (Too complicated; didn't understand.)
Last edited by due 07 at Aug 28, 2009,
#3
keep it to yourself, these things can be useful in future, shall we say, conflicts, plus it avoids all teen drama ++

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#4
Moral advice from the Pit?!?!

And sorry this is really too confusing for me to make sense of right now.
#6
Quote by due 07
tc;du (Too complicated; didn't understand.)


Why did you abbreviate that if you were still going to type the meaning behind it?

*Edit*

Christ, I'm finding myself removing a lot of cusswords from my posts tonight so I wont get banned while I'm warned.
#7
I really think you should, either way she will find out and its better if you tell her sooner. Maybe you can all come to some agreeament it was all about booze and forget about it. You really should tell her thouhg.
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#8
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keep it to yourself, these things can be useful in future, shall we say, conflicts, plus it avoids all teen drama ++



Are you saying for blackmail use? Can't say I haven't thought of that.
#9
Of course not, GF's come and go but mates are for life, unless they're grassing cunts
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#10
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Are you saying for blackmail use? Can't say I haven't thought of that.



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#12
Seeking morality in the pit is akin to hunting virgins in a titty bar.
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#13
Upon further reading, I now have a contribution:

If I were you, I would keep it a secret and keep everyone happy. But I don't really have any experience in this kind of situation... so it might backfire and the secret would be spread in the future anyways.
#14
You came to the Pit for Moral advice?
Damn.
I'd say tell her, personally.
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#15
Maybe pull it out when you really need it. But that dudes a super DB for sleeping with a chick you were into, and for cheating on that girl. He's broken many sacred bro rules. Total @$$master.
#16
-It would essentially ruin the rest of her, C, and J's college semester, and C and R are both freshman. This is especially ****ty since R expressed to me that she's glad she's dorming with C because she's having a lot of trouble fitting in and being away from home.


Wait until R has adjusted a little bit more, and has become less dependent on C. However, if it looks like J is going to propse before this happens, you have to tell her. You can't wait. Telling her after she's been proposed to will make it much harder.

-All parties involved would despise me in the end (R would be pissed, because I've known J was cheating on her, BEFORE he cheated on her with C)


Why didn't you tell her before? If it was to prevent her from being hurt, I think she'll eventually forgive you.

I think you should tell her. If J proposes to R, she could end up marrying that jerk. And he'll just cheat on her again, but it will be worse. Tell her for her own benefit. Don't let revenge be your prime motive because you might feel bad later on.
XIAOXI
Last edited by Abunai X at Aug 28, 2009,
#17
You sound like you're talking about Men In Black agents
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#19
Random alphabetical character confided in you in confidence. Keep your pie hole shut.
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#20
Its better she finds out now and you provide a voice of reason, then her catching him cheating. If you get away with it once, your gonna keep pushing the limits. Tell her bro.
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#21
Yeah, your friend has pretty much raped the Broality code. (Moral code for bros)
#22
tell her. no babe deserves to get cheated on like that.
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#23
Quote by Reighnart
Yeah, your friend has pretty much raped the Broality code. (Moral code for bros)

I was just about to say this. He broke the Bro Code. If Barnabus Stinson was alive today, he would tell you the right thing to do is screw over your bro, for breaking the Bro Code.


Seriously TS, if you don't tell her then you are an asshole.
#24
Quote by RobinTrower12
Moral advice from the Pit?!?!

And sorry this is really too confusing for me to make sense of right now.


Moral advice from pit, when i saw title and saw teh forum it was in, I lol'd
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#26
tell R about it and catch her on the rebound. everyone wins, and you're the only one who comes out of there (lolpun) feeling good.
#27
You lost me.
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#29
Asking the Pit for moral advice? The Pit has possibly the most ****ed up moral compass ever, second only to 4chan.
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#31
tl;dr
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HOLY HELL.

nice discovery, sir.


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Last edited by coryklok : Today at 01:10 PM.
#32
So you're taking who out the what now??
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#33
Secrets don't make friends. Tell whoever about what happened. More worse can come from something like this when the person finds out you knew the whole time and didn't say anything.
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#34
If I were you I'd be pretty damn angry with J and I'd have lost a ton of respect for C. You should probably confront one or both of them about what they both did.

EDIT:^RocksAwakening has an excellent point.
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Last edited by GodofCheesecake at Aug 30, 2009,
#35
Damn. This could be bad either way. I think the outcome would be worse if you told her, but it could be bad if they find out you knew but didn't say anything, like RocksAwakening said.
#36
Quote by due 07
tc;du (Too complicated; didn't understand.)

This, but from what I could make up of it, I wouldn't say anything. I was involved in a similar situation not to long ago and when all was revealed no good came out of it.
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