#1
Just the quotes, no discussion. And please post the quote, don't just refer to it. Movie monologues, tv quotes, quotes from novels all count:

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In America
Bruce McCulloch

"Some people look at a flag, swaying in the breeze of the White House and say, "That's America." Whenever I see an American flag hung in a window of a basement apartment by guys who have better things to do with their money than buy curtains, I say, "That's America to me."

In America, there are fifty-one states. Or maybe it's eighty by now. Does England count? I'm not quite sure. The one thing I am sure of is, if I'm standing in a warehouse beside a timeclock, and a guy is punching in his best friend who's too hungover to get out of bed, I'm standing in America.

The makeover capital of the world. The place where every young man has to answer in his heart the question: "What do you love more, your girlfriend, or your car?" Where that young man can buy a beat-up car for three hundred dollars, and spend a thousand dollars insuring it. The land where even a paperboy can option the film rights to a book.

America. In America, a woman on an assembly line works out her overtime in her head to infinity, and at the exact same moment, her husband gets into a car crash because he was looking at a girl in a tube top.

America. A land where spelling doesn't count, but people's pets do. Where else can you get a job riding a whale at Marine Land?

The land where a guy's girlfriend breaks up with him over the phone, so he takes a gun, and kills the principal. Everyone's sad until they get the day off. Next week, another guy, another gal, another, "We can still be friends" phone call. Uh-oh! The assistant principal gets killed. And everyone is sad because they don't get the day off. Because he was only the assistant principal.

America. A land of opportunity. Yes, that great lumbering beast that journeys tirelessly and stops only to eat a clubouse sandwich, pick its teeth with a matchbook cover, and fall asleep with the TV on.

America. A place for Americans."
#2
America: land of the free, home of the whopper
Scar tissue that I wish you saw
Sarcastic mister know it all
Close your eyes and I'll kiss you cause
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
#3
Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Ralph: Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!

Homer: Here's to alcohol, the cause of—and solution to—all life's problems.

Last edited by Twisted Magnum at Sep 1, 2009,
#4
And it goes faster than your mothers dinner plate.
Founder Of The "Jimmy Page Stole All Of My Potential Riffs" Club PM To Join!.

Quote by CoreysMonster
Meh, I usually just buy them off the local shaman, unless I'm in the wilderness, where I rely on raw meat to raise my HP.
#6
"I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!"

That's poetry, right there...
#8
Taken from the movie, Scent of a Woman.

Trask: Mr. Sims, you are a cover-up artist and you are a liar.

Slade: But not a snitch.

Trask: Excuse me?

Slade: No, I don't think I will.

Trask: Mr. Slade.

Slade: This is such a crock of ****.

Trask: Please watch your language, Mr. Slade. You are in the Baird School not a barracks. Mr. Sims, I will give you one final opportunity to speak up.

Slade: Mr. Sims doesn't want it. He doesn't need to labeled: "Still worthy of being a 'Baird Man.'" What the hell is that? What is your motto here? "Boys, inform on your classmates, save your hide" -- anything short of that we're gonna burn you at the stake? Well, gentlemen, when the **** hits the fan some guys run and some guys stay. Here's Charlie facing the fire; and there's George hidin' in big Daddy's pocket. And what are you doin'? You're gonna reward George and destroy Charlie.

Trask: Are you finished, Mr. Slade?

Slade: No, I'm just gettin' warmed up. I don't know who went to this place, William Howard Taft, William Jennings Bryan, William Tell -- whoever. Their spirit is dead -- if they ever had one -- it's gone. You're building a rat ship here. A vessel for sea goin' snitches. And if you think your preparing these minnows for manhood you better think again. Because I say you are killing the very spirit this institution proclaims it instills! What a sham. What kind of a show are you guys puttin' on here today. I mean, the only class in this act is sittin' next to me. And I'm here to tell ya this boy's soul is intact. It's non-negotiable. You know how I know? Someone here -- and I'm not gonna say who -- offered to buy it. Only Charlie here wasn't sellin'.

Trask: Sir, you are out of order!

Slade: Outta order? I'll show you outta order! You don't know what outta order is, Mr. Trask! I'd show you but I'm too old; I'm too tired; I'm too ****in' blind. If I were the man I was five years ago I'd take a FLAME-THROWER to this place! Outta order. Who the hell you think you're talkin' to? I've been around, you know? There was a time I could see. And I have seen boys like these, younger than these, their arms torn out, their legs ripped off. But there isn't nothin' like the sight of an amputated spirit; there is no prosthetic for that. You think you're merely sendin' this splendid foot-soldier back home to Oregon with his tail between his legs, but I say you are executin' his SOUL!! And why?! Because he's not a Baird man! Baird men, ya hurt this boy, you're going to be Baird Bums, the lot of ya. And Harry, Jimmy, Trent, wherever you are out there, **** YOU too!

Mr. Trask: Stand down, Mr. Slade!

Slade: I'm not finished! As I came in here, I heard those words, "cradle of leadership." Well, when the bow breaks, the cradle will fall. And it has fallen here; it has fallen. Makers of men; creators of leaders; be careful what kind of leaders you're producin' here. I don't know if Charlie's silence here today is right or wrong.

I'm not a judge or jury. But I can tell you this: he won't sell anybody out to buy his future!! And that, my friends, is called integrity! That's called courage! Now that's the stuff leaders should be made of. Now I have come to the crossroads in my life. I always knew what the right path was. Without exception, I knew. But I never took it. You know why? It was too damn hard. Now here's Charlie. He's come to the crossroads. He has chosen a path. It's the right path. It's a path made of principle -- that leads to character. Let him continue on his journey.

You hold this boy's future in your hands, committee. It's a valuable future. Believe me. Don't destroy it! Protect it. Embrace it. It's gonna make ya proud one day -- I promise you.
#9
Quote by Twisted Magnum

Ralph: Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!


my absolute favourite simpsons quote.
Member of UG's Tubgirl Virgins Club

Last.fm
#10
"What if capitalism is unsustainable, and socialism is impossible? We're ****ed, that's what." - Ken Macleod

"If you took the most ardent revolutionary, vested him in absolute power, within a year he would be worse than the Czar himself." - Mikhail Bakunin

"Why, how can you ask such a question? You are a republican."
"A republican! Yes; but that word specifies nothing. Res publica; that is, the public thing. Now, whoever is interested in public affairs – no matter under what form of government – may call himself a republican. Even kings are republicans."
"Well! You are a democrat?"
"No."
"What! "you would have a monarchy?"
"No."
" A Constitutionalist?"
"God forbid."
"Then you are an aristocrat?"
"Not at all!"
"You want a mixed form of government?"
"Even less."
"Then what are you?"
"I am an anarchist."
"Oh! I understand you; you speak satirically. This is a hit at the government."
"By no means. I have just given you my serious and well-considered profession of faith. Although a firm friend of order, I am (in the full force of the term) an anarchist. Listen to me." - Pierre Proudhon's 'Dialogue with a philistine'

"In times long gone by there were two sorts of people: one, the diligent, intelligent, and, above all, frugal élite; the other, lazy rascals, spending their substance, and more, in riotous living.... Thus it came to pass that the former sort accumulated wealth, and the latter sort had at last nothing to sell except their own skins. And from this original sin dates the poverty of the great majority that, despite all its labour, has up to now nothing to sell but itself, and the wealth of the few that increases constantly although they have long ceased to work. Such insipid childishness is every day preached to us in the defence of property.... In actual history it is notorious that conquest, enslavement, robbery, murder, briefly, force, play the great part" - Karl Marx
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#11
"My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next. "
#14
''I don't like the country. Creeps me out. In the country, dead bodies live in swamps, and ditches, and shallow graves. A man dumps the body of a girl in a ditch. The body rotts; Melts into slime. Flowers pop up where the body lies, seeds fly out of the flowers, and a bee sucks the flowers and makes honey. And then the family of the girl buys the honey from the store. And the family eats the girl.''

''It doesn't matter what country someone's from, or what they look like, or the color of their skin. It doesn't matter what they smell like, or that they spell words slightly differently some would say more correctly. I'm a person. Bret's a person. You're a person. That person over there is a person. And each person deserves to be treated like a person. ''
#15
Quote by SilentHeaven109
"I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-kiri Rock. I need scissors! 61!"

That's poetry, right there...


"I was a North American Fall Webworm in my past life. Those were the good old days... What were you in your former life?"

One of my favourite moments in a video game.
#16
Tommy Lee Jones: The person is smart, people are dumb panicky dangerous animals and you know it. 1500 years ago, everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. 500 years ago everybody knew the Earth was flat, 15 minutes ago, you knew that people were alone on this planet. Image what you will know tomorrow.
Quote by MakinLattes
dwelling on past mishaps is for the weak. you must stride into the future, unabashed and prepared to fuck up yet again.