C4C This isn't finished yet; all I still need is a bridge, then maybe an alternative verse, then I just need to write an outro. Let me know what you think; be honest, be harsh, and most of all, be constructive.

Edit: Here's the latest update; I think this song is pretty much finished, but still, if there's anything you don't like, please let me know.
Last edited by herby190 at Sep 13, 2009,
I like it, makes me feel happy.
Though there are some parts that sound weird (but I think that's GP) like Pre chorus 2 and all the bond notes. The notes and bass don't sound that interesting, but they do the job
I look forward to the finished product
Quote by Zeroxk
I like it, makes me feel happy.
Though there are some parts that sound weird (but I think that's GP) like Pre chorus 2 and all the bond notes. The notes and bass don't sound that interesting, but they do the job
I look forward to the finished product
Thanks; I'm at school right now (I'm ahead in my computer class, so I thought I'd check up here), but I plan on writing the Bridge as soon as I get home. Did you think the chorus worked, or should I change it?

Edit: Updates here; as I said above, be honest, be harsh, and be constructive.
Last edited by herby190 at Sep 9, 2009,
This is quite a nice, ubeat, and happy number you have going on. I think that every other repeat for the chorus, maybe have the guitar(s) playing a C5 instead of a B5 just to switch it up a bit if you feel like it. No real complaints at all yet. I do agree about the bass though. I'm sure live though that problem will be sorted out. Tabbing all the little fills gets annoying. Send me a message when you finish this one up
Its very good. The leads work well with the rhythm (something I myself have a hard time getting right...) I think it would be filled out perfect with lyrics

Overall, very catchy easy to follow. Simple yet effective. very good. 8/10

Crit my new one? please don't tell me. do drums.
Last edited by Vileartist at Sep 9, 2009,
The intro was nice, had a great upbeat feeling, but I must say it felt like it went on a bit too long.
I love the chorus lol, simple yet sounds good. I know its a pop-punk song and vocals are relied on quite heavily so I won't worry too much about the repetitiveness of the song, but maybe just for fun on guitar pro throw a fun lead somewhere just to mix it up.
Also i dunno if it's guitar pro, but pre-chorus 2 seems to clash a bit, but it's just because GP makes those kind of chords sound bad lol. Maybe after the chorus throw in a blink 182 style interlude or something, with just drums, bass and a nice clean guitar, I dunno, just suggesting lol.
All right, I've got another update; not much is changed now, these are just the finishing touches. I went with a little bit of a different idea for the outro this time, and I changed the chords in the second Pre-Chorus a bit; tell me which you prefer.

Edit: I added this update to the OP.
Last edited by herby190 at Sep 13, 2009,
I figured out that it was the bass that was bugging me hah...i altered it a little bit, just so it sounds alright TO ME, not sure if you want it like that though.
Also just for fun i played around with the lead in the post chorus lol
Your version of GP5's later than mine, so I can't open that; you'll have to export it to GP4.
I had already listened by the time I saw that you updated it, so this is a crit of the original. And for future reference DON'T PUT UPDATED FILES IN REPLIES, YOU CAN EDIT THE OP TO REPLACE THE OLD FILE WITH THE NEW ONE. Sorry for the caps but this happens so often and it's really frustrating.

As for the crit: The intro sucks. It's the most generic intro ever. Guitar by itself? Check. Drums and bass enter together? Check. Chord progression that's been beaten to death? Check. (I know it's not exactly the same, but the first 4 chords are.) Sorry to be so mean However, when the second guitar comes in it's only a million times better. Really cool lead riff. There's some dissonance between the parts but nothing overly distracting. Goes into a happy head-bobbing verse. Cool. Prechorus is good. I like the actual chorus too. Overall I think if you scrapped the intro the rest of the song is worth keeping.
Check out my band Disturbed
Last edited by StewieSwan at Sep 11, 2009,
As promised, C4C . Thanks for commenting Never Again, I will be uploading more soon. As for the song, I agree with most of the people here, it gives me a happy feel. Perhaps it's because of the lead riffing, which is very nice. I can't say anything that hasn't been said before, like the chords in the prechorus. However, in my very own personal style, I'd change the drums a little bit. Some faster, a little more agressive fills. But then maybe it would change the whole feeling of the song. Pretty good, however =D. Congrats.
Quote by angusfan16

That penis guitar. Hell, i'd wank it.

The lead riff in Logan's part every third measure out of the four pisses me off because the notes just don't fit like the the others. I'm glad this kind of Pop Punk actually has a bit of a guitar part that makes it a bit unique. The Pre-chorus needs more drums and there needs to be a more definite transition between it and the chorus. The Post-Chorus would be fine if it didn't have the 3rd out of 4 measure again. The little "solo" actually sounded pretty cool. For the drums of the 3rd verse, try using quarter notes on the bass drum instead of the notes on the hi hat. For the drums of the outro, add a real beat on the ride w/ the snare and all and it'll sound excellent. I want to hear vocals, NAOW! :P
sounds like Always by Blink 182 but it's not too bad. it just sounds like a blink song instead of something you came up with on your own you know. but it's still good.

check out my song?

talk to me
and i better not hear a word
do me baby
i better not feel it girl
i still got one bullet left in my nine
finna do a love crime
love crime
finna do a love crime

lovecrimes -- frank ocean

Last edited by Fearless(Times) at Sep 15, 2009,