#1
Okay pit,

I moved into a rather nice part of town with my girlfriend. A small little quaint condo on a quiet little street. Sounds nice eh?

Unfortunately every weekend i get 4-5 different solicitors banging on my door for different things. The H.O.A does not allow us to put up "NO SOLICITING" signs, or security doors.

If I don't answer the door, they bang louder and wait forever. So i've turned into a prick and open the door and tell them to get lost.

How do you deal with these retards, or whats the best way to get rid of them?
#3
step 1: de-install your doorbell.
step 2: always lock the door of your condo
step 3: install a human-seeking missile system into your door
#4
Neverender:SSTB 4/19


Goddamn this cursed iron fist. When I lose control!


[quote="'[VictorinoX"]']You, sir, win epically.
#5
Attach a mechanism to your doorbell that delivers a fatal electric shock when it's touched.

Probably wouldn't even be that difficult to accomplish.
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#7
Quote by Ur all $h1t
Attach a mechanism to your doorbell that delivers a fatal electric shock when it's touched.

Probably wouldn't even be that difficult to accomplish.



knowing me i'd somehow lock myself out of the condo, and try to ring the doorbell thus frying me.

I'll have to give that a try...
#9
I think we're thinking of different kinds of solicitor.

Quote by fishstickrocker
Yes get a black guy with a gun that's not racist at all...



Oh no!
#10
Quote by fishstickrocker
Yes get a black guy with a gun that's not racist at all...



SHut up you prat, you're the racist one for assuming JUST because he's put a picture of a black guy he's being racist.

Grow up.
There's riddles in the shadows
They're thrown the way that i'd expect
And people never seem to know
What they least suspect is coming next
#11
Get a blood covered shirt on and have you gf laying in the back where visable and awnser the door calmly.
#12
We were thinking of having my girlfriend open the door topless, with NO SOLICITING written on her tits. At least they'd look and get the idea.... But then we figured they'd solicit the wrong thing....*sigh*
#13
Quote by koikomoru
We were thinking of having my girlfriend open the door topless, with NO SOLICITING written on her tits. At least they'd look and get the idea.... But then we figured they'd solicit the wrong thing....*sigh*

They'll enjoy that.
You should answer it naked, with a raging boner, that you are furiously stroking.
Act like nothing is wrong and see if you can ejaculate on them before they leave.
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#14
Open the door naked.
If You See Me Posting In The Pit HIT ME.
Quote by KingJak236
My hamster used to bite me when I picked it up, then it got too old and fat to bite and died in a pool of it's own vomit.

Quote by Kensai
That's the rockstar way to go. I salute him.
#15
Quote by Ur all $h1t
They'll enjoy that.
You should answer it naked, with a raging boner, that you are furiously stroking.
Act like nothing is wrong and see if you can ejaculate on them before they leave.



Remember to make eye contact the whole time too.
#16
Quote by Ur all $h1t
They'll enjoy that.
You should answer it naked, with a raging boner, that you are furiously stroking.
Act like nothing is wrong and see if you can ejaculate on them before they leave.

this, showing your gf's tits will make 'em happy. you dont want that
#17
Quote by Well.......
Remember to make eye contact the whole time too.

And moan quietly while they make their sales pitch.
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington