#1
C4C.

Although it says GP5, it has GP4 also.

I feel like there's a good song that can be written off of this, but I also feel it's going to take a lot of rewriting. This is what I've got so far. Let me know anything you like or don't like; seeing as it's still being developed, any little suggestion will be a huge help. As always, be honest, be harsh, and most of all, be constructive.

Edit: I've got an update with some slight changes; I'm still trying to think of a new chorus, this one isn't working out the way it did in my head.
Attachments:
Projecta 13.zip
Projecta 13 update.zip
Last edited by herby190 at Sep 18, 2009,
#2
Thanks for the crit on my song earlier!

It's an alright song, very original in sound and progression IMO but the lack of rhythmic variation really brought it down.

The drum beat is pretty standard and mediocre IMO, it kept the beat but didn't really add much to the song. I reckon, what you should be aiming for is to make every instrument contribute a part to the music instead of being just another layer.

The guitar parts are pretty repetitive and the rhythm being just straight quavers made it a bit boring. IMHO, the lack of rhythmic variation really takes away from what I think punk sounds like. I reckon it'd sound great if you added some muted scratches between the notes and make it syncopated for the single note layer and the chords could play something similar.

This is punk, it should be full of energy and have a full sound, try some crash and splash hits and stuff like that instead of a variation of the basic rockbeat. I find that the closed hi hat sound lacks the "full" sound that you need for punk music, it just makes the music sound alot more one dimensional IMO.

IMO, your chord changes are too quick aswell, perhaps you could try playing the chords for longer, making your phrases longer and allowing you more time to "talk" about an idea in the music instead of having several short, repetitive phrases. Think of it as a speech, a short points don't go in depth in what you have to say and leave you little time to say it in while long points (Longer phrases) will allow you to communicate your idea for an extended period of time. (That made more sense in my head)

Thank you once again for your crit on my piece and hope mine sufficed.
#3
This more than sufficed; I really needed to hear from someone on this, because I put it on here because I didn't really know what was right and what should be changed, or even completely removed. Thanks.
#4
Not something I would normally listen to at all.

Intro was decent, nothing wrong so far. The 9th fret in bat 12 sounded 'off' to me though.

The verse sounds way alot like the intro, not that that is a bad thing, without vocals it would be bland though.

Pre' wasn't bad, not sure on Logan's part for those 2 bars though, or his part in the chorus for that matter. I'd suggest trying some octave things harmonizing what Zach is doing, almost like a lead.

Not bad so far, could use work overall.
I deeply regret the 6661 in my username. Siiiigh. Damn you, 14 year old me, you edgy little bastard.