#1
shock going through me white lightening
tingling all around
i got a fever for a touch that's growing
get any hotter gonna burn to the ground

she'll get down easy, just tolight my fire
don't need a reason, no it's just the call of the wild

i've got a yearn for confrontation
craving the taste that i found
watching you shakin' your hips now baby
hypnotic spinning round and around

she'll get down easy, just tolight my fire
don't need a reason, no it's just the call of the wild
#2
Quote by drivethru73
shock going through me white lightening
tingling all around
i got a fever for a touch that's growing
get any hotter gonna burn to the ground

she'll get down easy, just tolight my fire
don't need a reason, no it's just the call of the wild

i've got a yearn for confrontation
craving the taste that i found
watching you shakin' your hips now baby
hypnotic spinning round and around

she'll get down easy, just tolight my fire
don't need a reason, no it's just the call of the wild



pretty good. needs spaces in "to light". lol

Improve the overall grammar too. It felt like you just typed it in right there on the spot
If a mortal stands before us
Strike him down with sleight of hand.
And if heaven rides against us
Then God himself must be damned.


Computer Science major! Apple enthusiast!
I wear Vibrams and type with Dvorak!
#3
Quote by GODhimself37
needs spaces in "to light". lol


talk about critical lol my keyboard doesn't function well in forums. for some reason it doesn't register every keystroke.

here's it is with a bunch of grammer fixes, not sure if i got all the ones you saw. reads alot better with the changes, so thanks for the input.

Shock going though me, like lightening
Tingling, all around
I've got a fever for a touch that's growing
Get any hotter gonna burn to the ground

She'll get down easy, just to light my fire
Don't need a reason, no it's just the call of the wild

I'm yearning for confrontation
Craving the taste i've found
Watching you shaking your hips now baby
Hypnotic, spinning round and around
#4
good.
If a mortal stands before us
Strike him down with sleight of hand.
And if heaven rides against us
Then God himself must be damned.


Computer Science major! Apple enthusiast!
I wear Vibrams and type with Dvorak!