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#1
This was kinda sorta inspired by the farting thread, but I figured we could be a little more general and get some laughs out of it all the same.

A few from me:

Once in seventh grade I went to class to find that we had a new seating chart. I was directly next to my crush, two people to a table, so we were lab partners. Awesome! Maybe now I finally have a chance with her...

...so I go into class and sit down. Back then I used to take my school breakfast to class to eat since we didn't have time otherwise. I opened my carton of milk when an important announcement came on the intercom.

After the announcement I continued my breakfast, but had forgotten about opening my milk. It was chocolate milk, so I inadvertently picked it up and shook it like the carton indicated.

You can guess what happened.

Another happened my freshman year of high school in English class. Somehow I got a "tickle" in the back of my throat that sent me into an insane coughing fit. After about ten minutes of nonstop coughing, my teacher finally told me to excuse myself if need be.

I got up to go to the bathroom when my foot got caught between my chair and my desk, sending me hurling towards the ground, coughing the entire time.

After a few seconds of shock and coughing on the floor, I gathered what was left of my dignity and got a drink of water.

Share your stories of shame!
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.


-Jimi Hendrix-

Quote by CodySG
You know you're in the drug thread when you see pictures of squash and "tuna nigga!" when you click the page.
#2
I was put on the spot in my Heavy Duty Truck Transmission class and was asked some question I didn't know the answer to. I spent about 2.5 minutes rambling on and stuttering trying to answer. He wouldn't take "I don't know" as an answer. I felt like a dumbass after that one.
#3
Quote by dudetheman
You can guess what happened.

Everything went well and you sexed her up.
all I ever wanted was to pick apart the day
put the pieces back together my way
#5
Called the teacher 'Mom' by accident. I don't even know where it came from. I think it was in 3rd or 4th grade. Surprisingly though, I've seen the exact same thing happen to a few other people during that year and a few following years.
#57 in UG Top 100 2010!

I really ought to get my username changed...
#6
i sat next to the girl i liked in science...the things i said...
Scar tissue that I wish you saw
Sarcastic mister know it all
Close your eyes and I'll kiss you cause
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
#7
Well today I sneezed. I tried to keep it quiet but instead it slipped through my lips and made a really loud, weird farting noise
#8
this one time i said pi was 3.14159265358979323846264338327950287 not 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288.

ololololollololo how embarrased i was.
Yours Sincerely,


Dr. Speakers
#9
Quote by speakers
this one time i said pi was 3.14159265358979323846264338327950287 not 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288.

ololololollololo how embarrased i was.



Idiot!

...>_>
#57 in UG Top 100 2010!

I really ought to get my username changed...
#10
I've called a couple teachers mom...one time my english teacher called me out for apparently "sniffing someone's armpit", and i was just writing and he's all "Marcus, you can smell jeremey's pits after my class"

I 'd
#11
I once sneezed, and farted at the same time. Thankfully the power of my sneeze pushed my chair concealing the fart noise. However, the smell was pungent and suspicious. So I claimed ignorance and blamed the kid beside me.


Not in school, but I also once sneezed and sharted at the same time.
██████████████████████
███████████████████████
███████████████████████
███████████████████████
█████████████████████
██████████████████████
O CANADA!
#12
Probably taking a test when I hadn't eaten anything all day. Oh the grumbles of my stomach...

One shook a pencil off my desk
--

How do you say "I'm okay" to an answering machine?

--
#13
I was talking with a friend and then the whole classroom shut up and i say **** THIS SCHOOL. the principal was standing in the door.


Another:
I was having a very graphical conversation and i move the hand backwards fast without seeing and i just spank a girl in the ass behind me.... CLASSIC
VENEZUELA


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Ibanez RG7321
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Zoom 101 Multi effects
#15
Quote by PhillyHendrix
Called the teacher 'Mom' by accident. I don't even know where it came from. I think it was in 3rd or 4th grade. Surprisingly though, I've seen the exact same thing happen to a few other people during that year and a few following years.

I've done that before, it's not really that embarrassing, unless you do it passed the 5th grade. I can't really think of a time that I was really embarrassed in class, I'm just one smooth motherfucker
Quote by ThinLizzyFan
I love you



Who's in a bunker?
Who's in a bunker?
Women and children first
And the children first
And the children
#16
9th Grade, World Geography, 6th period:

We had free dress for a week and me being the lazy *** that I am wore basketball shorts and t-shirts. Thursday, I thought was still safe. Mr. Wellman calls me up to answer a few questions on the blackboard, my girlfriend, who sat at the front, got up and pants me in front the whole class.


I had on boxer briefs.
#17
Quote by stratman_13
Probably taking a test when I hadn't eaten anything all day. Oh the grumbles of my stomach...

One shook a pencil off my desk

Stomach growling is SOOO embarrassing! Especially when you're next to an attractive girl. There's nothing you can do about it!
#18
I dont remember a time I was embarassed... I'm too quiet :'(
In diesem Herz hab ich die Macht.

Gear:
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VOX Valvetronix VT20+
Kay K390 Acoustic
#20
I banged my teacher and accidentally got her fired. Then everyone bullied me for being a big fat meanie. 2nd grade was a hard year...
If it were socially acceptable, I would drape myself in velvet.

Quote by Bassist1992
When I was 11.

Googled "I would like to watch some porn please"



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I;m rdruk I feel no pain

#21
talking about lord of the flies and the teacher mentioned autocracy. i tried spinning it to sound like i knew what autocracy was. it didn't end well. but it turns out i knew what it was.
and i was leaning over next to the girl i liked and a giant fart came out. it didn't smell but it was highly audible.


What are you dense?
Are you retarded or something?
Who the hell do you think I am?
I'm the goddamn Batman.

April 19th, 2011: The Night of the Boob

Last edited by RampagingAcorn at Oct 13, 2009,
#22
I can't remember any super ones off the top of my head, but there've bben a few. Usually farts .
#23
I sat next to girl I liked in science all year, and I went out with her. Then we broke up.

Not embarrassing, really, but unbelievably awkward.
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She could walk up your pubes with those

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this post has aids
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and 07'ers will always be well-respected members of UG society.
#24
Quote by skaterskagg1
Stomach growling is SOOO embarrassing! Especially when you're next to an attractive girl. There's nothing you can do about it!


Happens to me every few days or so. No idea why.
#57 in UG Top 100 2010!

I really ought to get my username changed...
#25
being told off by the teacher is never fun because you actually have to take it.
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”

Oscar Wilde
#26
yeah iv tried to do a sneaky silent fat but it came out like a trumpet, you can usually tell if there gona be silent!
#27
Whenever substitutes used to come to our school and be appalled the amount of **** I took from everyone, they would try to comfort me, pat my back, and say everything will be all right. I didn't really care, and still don't but they are always like "Oh dear, Mr. Lampman, everything will be alright, I'm sure your parents love you!"

Also, a very stupid boy in my class told the most serious and intimidating teacher at school that I was going to kill myself because when he tried to talk to me on a 3 hour bus ride from a field trip, I didn't answer. He didn't know that 1. I hate him & 2. I was sleeping. That 20 minutes of him telling me that the world is a great place full of hope, that there are places where I can get help, I can take pills for depression, etc.,were the most awkward minutes in my life.
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#29
Quote by bry0n
I sat next to girl I liked in science all year, and I went out with her. Then we broke up.

Not embarrassing, really, but unbelievably awkward.

And then after you found out that she went comatose because of the break up, you came back and went on to father a half human-half vampire girl who your best friend who's a werewolf instantly fell in love with. Right?
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#30
I didn't do this, but the other day in my Sculpture class the kid next to me got a handjob. Needless to say I got up and sat on the opposite side of the classroom.
love is love // return to dust
#31
Quote by tancanada
I didn't do this, but the other day in my Sculpture class the kid next to me got a handjob. Needless to say I got up and sat on the opposite side of the classroom.


Like right next to you? Wow that would be awkward
Quote by blackflag49
Condoms, for all the copious amounts of pussy with which you will be inevitably bombarded from this moment onward.


#32
Quote by rock_star77
I once sneezed, and farted at the same time. Thankfully the power of my sneeze pushed my chair concealing the fart noise. However, the smell was pungent and suspicious. So I claimed ignorance and blamed the kid beside me.


Not in school, but I also once sneezed and sharted at the same time.



hahahah, so friggin good.
Jenniferx <3.
#33
In 8th grade once I had pretty bad gas while the class was silent and doing work. My friend and I were joking aroud and he pushed me and a nice loud fart came out. Miraculously only he noticed but he told a bunch of people about it after...
#34
Quote by speakers
this one time i said pi was 3.14159265358979323846264338327950287 not 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288.

ololololollololo how embarrased i was.

omg I haven't laughed that hard in a while!


On topic: One time I had REALLY bad gas at a rally. I farted, but kept it silent. It honestly smelled like death just died. Apparently it was so bad, everyone around knew it was me because I tracked it all over the place. Needless to say, some jerks pointed it out that I was the culprit.
Quote by blackflag49
Condoms, for all the copious amounts of pussy with which you will be inevitably bombarded from this moment onward.


Last edited by bingeandletgo at Oct 13, 2009,
#35
In 9th grade I said something rude to this girl and she started kicking my ass in the middle of the hallway. In 8th grade a fat girl farted in my face. In 10th grade I had to work in groups in science. I asked the kid next to me why the girl in our group had to **** a brick every time I told her she was wrong, just as the whole class fell silent.
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They respawn though


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jazz bass.

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Current rig: Peavey Millennium 5 - Drive B15

To buy: Ampeg BA112 or BA115
#36
I threw up all over the desks and floor as i was tanked at school (sophomore year). I almost died cos of my blood alcohol level. I also got suspended and so did 2 of my friends.



not a good year...
>>-(ಠ_ಠ-<<
>>-(. Y .)-<<
>>> . (<<<
>>-( Y )-<<
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Dude, your fucking sig creeps me out.

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I just noticed his sig too...I feel uncomfortable now...

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Your sig killed my boner _


DIY SO-CAL PUNK LABEL
#37
Quote by speakers
this one time i said pi was 3.14159265358979323846264338327950287 not 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288.

ololololollololo how embarrased i was.


god dude...whats wrong with you?
#39
Quote by Guitarist117
god dude...whats wrong with you?


nothing..
Yours Sincerely,


Dr. Speakers
#40
during an exam in 9th grade, i had a nosebleed, ended up getting it on my test papers. luckily no one was really paying attention...
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