Arycama
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2007
480 IQ
#1
This is a power metal song I have written for my band Matronarch. Its the first completed song we have. See what you think, I would appreciate some criticism and comments.
Attachments:
Song 1 - The Forgotten Legacy.zip
Last edited by Arycama at Oct 16, 2009,
NFXtreme
I'm Not Crazy
Join date: Oct 2006
795 IQ
#2
Lyrics seemed a little cliche'd, but aside from that I loved it. Harmonised stuff was great, it all seemed to flow really nicely. I'd love to hear a proper recording of this sometime. =)
dontbestupid47
geRitseder esUr
Join date: Jul 2006
351 IQ
#3
this sounded awesome, i loved the harmony, it had a great beat, the solos were nice, i liked the "call and response" of the guitars during the interlude. I would also love to hear the recording of this. the modulation worked well also.
The only thing i have to comment on was already commented on, the lyrics were kind of cliche in some parts.
Great job, thanks for the crit
Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
Victor V.
Registered User
Join date: Jan 2009
22 IQ
#4
I like it, the solos are great, but like the guy above said, the lyrics are too cliche'd.

I also think the intro I would sound better as an Acoustic Grand Piano. And the vocals need vibratto.

I don't think there is anything else I would change, this piece is great.

(Like the guy above said, I'd like to hear a recording from this)
Last edited by Victor V. at Oct 16, 2009,
DiminishedFifth
Absolute Imperfection
Join date: Nov 2008
3,247 IQ
#5
Thanks for the crit ^^

Do you happen to listen to X JAPAN? Cause this oddly reminds me of them... it really does, and i'm not too sure why (aside from the blatant power metalness).

It's pretty good. Not really my "style" of power metal. This kind is a bit too... "cliche" for lack of a better word. But that's kind of biased since I really like the "classical" sound.

I do, however, agree that the vocal line needs vibrato. And I think it's too stuck in the notes it uses. Mix it up a little bit! Especially when you go to the different verses, and the modulated chorus.

The 2nd Guitar Solo II I feel should be harmonized. I think that would add a lot. Or at least harmonized for a couple measures or so.

Other than that it's pretty good :] Good work! And I hope it works out as good in real life as it did here.
Z3r0747
Registered User
Join date: Jul 2009
54 IQ
#6
Wow, the intro was awesome. Harmonies were great, the verse vocals need a little more variety and vibrato IMO, but the chorus was great and reminded me a bit of Sonata Arctica. I personally don't mind the cliche'd lyrics tbh. I'm not quite sure if you're going for the typical "destroying the dark lord with the power of our majestic swords" power metal or more serious stuff, but the lyrics weren't bad.

The solos were good, and the interlude afterward fit perfectly.

I'm not sure how this would sound with an actual vocalist, maybe add a few more high register notes? (depends on the singer's vocal range, of course)

But yeah, I'd give it an 8/10, just change the verse melodies around a bit, as I found them kinda boring but otherwise, awesome song!
Arycama
Registered User
Join date: Mar 2007
480 IQ
#7
Theres a recording on my bands myspace of this song (http://www.myspace.com/matronarch), so you can hear it with an actual singer Thanks for all the comments by the way. I've added a few things here and there, and plan to work on the lyrics.
Last edited by Arycama at Oct 18, 2009,