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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck SHOW ME YOUR BOOBIES :S
You are free to do what we tell you.
Quote by Rocking-Rob
Would there be any resistance if I took you Ohm?

i don't know a single chick in a 100 mile radius that would actually get that

Maybe not the dirties, but the funniest one i've witnessed was my bud lowering his fly, then approaching a girl and getting her attention then slowly zipping up his pants

maybe you hadda be there...
And a legitimate pickup line I guarantee will never fail:

"My two favorite things are commitment and changing myself."
My Blog
New bands you wish you knew about!

Check This Band:As Blood Runs Black
Guitarist of the month: Quorthon

Got a good band that you want to share with the world? PM me and I'll write them a review.
"Come here, you ravishing devil!"

"You know, this would be really cool if it weren't for the whole 'clothes still on' thing."

"I'll get my propane into your accessory!"

"I'm going to put my quantum harmonizer into your photonic resonation chamber!"

"I'll cut that forest down with my axe!"
Quote by EuBoat
"The name's Albrecht.

Fassa Albrecht."

Chinese Democracy is a great album, people need to get over Slash.

Proud fan of Pop, Rap, Rock, and Metal.
Quote by ThorMagneson

"I'm going to put my quantum harmonizer into your photonic resonation chamber!"

Flip a coin, heads I get tails, tails I get head.
If your right leg is Halloween and your left leg is Christmas, can I come visit in between the holidays.
e-married to Jack (bladez)
Probably been said:

"If I asked you to have sex with me, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one?"
Quote by C O B H C
If you want to get really technical about it..

1. Grab sticks.
2. Bang sticks on drums.

^how to play drums.

I made this up, or at least think i did, ive never heard it used or anything but its actually worked, although thats do to moreso my girlfriends sense of humor.

Roses are love, violets are luck, with a little of both we can ****.
Currently Playing:
Arma 2/3, Dayz, GW2, GTA, Splinter Cell, ESO, FF:X, Pokemon X
Quote by Finis
How much wood can a wood chuck chuck SHOW ME YOUR BOOBIES :S

Epic.... thanks everyone for adding posts and lines and keeping this thread the funniest ****in one on UG. Your all so ****ing awesome and so I would all like to thank you, sincerely. By the way, **** you. BYE!
Quote by yellowshirtguy
Probably been said:

"If I asked you to have sex with me, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one?"

If god's magic jizz jizzed on anyone in the world, it would have been yellowshirtguy.
Nice legs when do they open XD
Quote by me_llamo_juan
Would you like to go to church with me?

I approve of your avatar. I personally don't know any pick-up lines in English, so most of the stuff here is new to me.
sup bro
Quote by St. Angry
youre right. i just checked the dvd i have agian and it is in D standard. i dont think Metallica has ever done a song in drop D, or drop C for that matter.

^Check his username again
*in math class*
girl: how'd you do that?
guy: i just did it in my head
girl: oh
guy: im doing more than just math in my head
Scar tissue that I wish you saw
Sarcastic mister know it all
Close your eyes and I'll kiss you cause
With the birds I'll share
This lonely view
Just get a cigarette, take a draw, blow it in the girls face, and say:

"I'll **** you later".

In my experience, it's worked every time. Even if I only tried it once.

I don't really recommend it. I just got lucky >.>
Matter is void. All is vanity. All is nothing. Nothing exists.

But damn does whisky rule
"there's something wrong with my phone... Your number is not in it"
" nice dress it would look great on the floor next to my bed."
" can we ****?"


Originally Posted by Guitarbaddie
Dude, she's like 12, what is wrong with you?

Originally Posted by RockGuitar92
You're the one who came on her face.

hey, i wanna f*** you


you might as well sleep with me im gonna tell everyone you did anyways









If you were shoes, I'd break you in

If you were a balloon, I'd go up to you, go :O and blow

I write songs.
Currently Requiring Crits:
Do you like maths?

Let's add a bed,
minus some clothes,
divide your legs,
and hope we don't multiply
"You have brains in your head,
You have feet in your shoes,
You can steer yourself,
any direction you choose,
You're on your own,
And you know what you know,
And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go."

- Dr. Seuss
*Guess where I am eating out tonight
*Your C***

True story, worked for my friend.
Quote by spleanx
Hey look a penis.


see you in 9 months.

>>-(. Y .)-<<
>>> . (<<<
>>-( Y )-<<
Quote by dudetheman
Dude, your fucking sig creeps me out.

Quote by Kosh H
I just noticed his sig too...I feel uncomfortable now...

Quote by WantsLesPaul
Your sig killed my boner _

hey baby I got massive diarrhea and cant hold it, can I just shit all-over your chest?

worked for me twice
Last edited by Myfirstpubes at Nov 11, 2009,
In the words of Eddie Riggs, "I'm the wiener, you're the bun, come on over and let's have fun."

Worked for him.
Quote by diofan88
Life's too short to drink cheap beer.
Quote by beadhangingOne
Every band is a lotr metal band. Metal is like Guile's theme for Lotr.
Quote by mcjosh
Whoever thinks Japan deserved the tsunami in any way should just go away and fucking die alone.
i just shit my pants, can i get in yours?

or the messed up one my freind said, i just shit my pants, can i have your number?
Quote by 23:50 inbleach
can't i just eat the fucking cactus?

Quote by WildChicken
Go suck a cat westdyolf!

Quote by Cat Of Pain
So, West...

I hear you'll suck my cat...

Ill suck your cat
call me zach

chocolate chip pancakes!
So....come here often?
Paul Reed Smith SE Custom 24
Marshall MG30DFX
ISP Noise Decimator
Need a new amp. Any ideas? PM me

Quote by Kensai
Either you got the wrong thread or the gays in your state are very well hung.

Hey how about you sit on my face and let me eat my way to your heart.

Hey you gave a beautiful voice I bet it would sound even better muffled by my penis

I'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore ur anus.
Probably said before but,

"Let's play train conducter! You sit on my face and I'll Choo Choo Choo!"
*lick finger, touch to girl's shirt*

Lets get you out of those wet clothes.
Quote by necrosis1193
As usual Natrone's mouth spouts general win.

Quote by Silverstein14
man, Natrone you're some kind of ninja I swear

Quote by gregs1020

i realize the longshot that is. little giant to humongous one.

Rest In Peace Stevie Ray
"Are you a battery?

...cause those look like double D's!!!" hahahahahha epic.
Quote by Kensai
When I wear it I have to fight off women with a stick. Ifyouknowwhatimean.

Quote by daytripper75
Today, 2:51pm EST: Prodigy179 has officially hit puberty.

They're eating her! And then they're going to eat me!