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#1
So, Pit, say you have a girlfriend. Now say you're hanging out with another friend who is a girl. How far would you say you'd have to go before it's cheating on your girlfriend?

Note: I'm only asking this purely because my friend and I got into an argument over this. I currently do not have a girlfriend and haven't cheated on anyone xD.

The options are:

Flirting
Sex jokes
Peck on the cheek
Peck on the lips
5-second kiss
Making out
2nd base
3rd base
Oral
Sex

I say it becomes cheating as soon as you get to the kiss on the lips part. A kiss on the cheek isn't that bad, but a kiss on the lips is definitely at least partly sexual.
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#2
I agree with TS. Most of the time, that's too sexual or hinting at taking it further.
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#3
Flirting
Peck on the lips
5-second kiss
Making out
2nd base
3rd base
Oral
Sex

IMO, Cheating.

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#4
Quote by MyNameIsLame
So, Pit, say you have a girlfriend. Now say you're hanging out with another friend who is a girl. How far would you say you'd have to go before it's cheating on your girlfriend?

Note: I'm only asking this purely because my friend and I got into an argument over this. I currently do not have a girlfriend and haven't cheated on anyone xD.

The options are:

Flirting
Sex jokes
Peck on the cheek
Peck on the lips
--------------------------------
5-second kiss
Making out
2nd base
3rd base
Oral
Sex

I say it becomes cheating as soon as you get to the kiss on the lips part. A kiss on the cheek isn't that bad, but a kiss on the lips is definitely at least partly sexual.

the line has been drawn
#6
peck on the cheek down, excluding family members, do what is standard practice with them.
Quote by FatalGear41
I wouldn't call what we have here on the Bass Forum a mentality. It's more like the sharing part of an AA meeting.

Quote by Jason Jillard
HUMANITY WHATS WRONG WITH YOU.


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#7
Flirting's ok, i mean your not married on anything, you need to keep your options open.

I say rubbing and/or kissing.
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#9
the line isn't that clear. well it should be for whoever's worrying about it. but it's not the same every time. if you're attracted to someone else and go with those feelings at all, then it's cheating. even if it's just a thought. if it's a thought you wouldn't tell your girlfriend to her face, it's a thought you shouldn't be thinking. same with any of those. think about what you would do if your girlfriend was sitting right next to you. that's line enough.
#10
Quote by ShallowEndings
Na.

The options are:

Flirting
Sex jokes
Peck on the cheek
--------------------------------
Peck on the lips
5-second kiss
Making out
2nd base
3rd base
Oral
Sex


This.
#11
Every single one of those is cheating really, but it depends on context: if you're good friends with the girl, then flirting and sex jokes could just be funny and it isn't really cheating (but as soon as you get to pecks and kissing, then you've crossed the line).
#13
Flirting
Sex jokes
Peck on the cheek

More than that, it's cheating imo.
#15
Quote by sandyman323
the line isn't that clear. well it should be for whoever's worrying about it. but it's not the same every time. if you're attracted to someone else and go with those feelings at all, then it's cheating. even if it's just a thought. if it's a thought you wouldn't tell your girlfriend to her face, it's a thought you shouldn't be thinking. same with any of those. think about what you would do if your girlfriend was sitting right next to you. that's line enough.


You have a good point. Also, you kinda have to take into account how long you've been dating. If my girlfriend of a week started flirting with another guy, I'd probably think she wanted him instead of me because we haven't really dated that long. But if my girlfriend of like one year was flirting with some guy I'd probably have enough trust in her to think that it's just harmless talking.
Quote by Mudmen190
If loving ham makes me gay, I'm Rob Halford.


Quote by musiclover2399
MyNameIsLame just nailed it (actually both his statements did some nailing).


Quote by Oroborous
This is honestly the best first post I've ever seen


^^ Directed at me. E-peen wankery sigs ftw.

My Last.FM
#17
I'd say cheating is anything sensual in nature that you would hide from your significant other, or know they would disapprove. If you think your girlfriend flashing her tits is fine, then it's not cheating. If your boyfriend thinks kissing others on the cheek is not okay, then it's cheating.
#18
I think that it can be a little relative. Some would consider a little flirting to be cheating. Other would consider that just wanting to be around another girl cheating. What I think is a good definition is in two parts:
a) "Would your girlfriend be upset if you did [action A]"
b) "Would you be upset if your girlfriend did [action A]"

If you are uncomfortable with your girlfriend hitting on other guys, maybe you shouldn't either. If you are uncomfortable with your girlfriend kissing other guys, maybe you shouldn't kiss other girls (or guys).
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#19
Quote by Chaos Nil
I think that it can be a little relative. Some would consider a little flirting to be cheating. Other would consider that just wanting to be around another girl cheating. What I think is a good definition is in two parts:
a) "Would your girlfriend be upset if you did [action A]"
b) "Would you be upset if your girlfriend did [action A]"

If you are uncomfortable with your girlfriend hitting on other guys, maybe you shouldn't either. If you are uncomfortable with your girlfriend kissing other guys, maybe you shouldn't kiss other girls (or guys).


This.
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#20
you can be fun and flirty with other girls provided your head is in the right place. When you make a commitment, you should be happy and ok with that. You can LOOK but you CAN'T TOUCH.

It's not so much the specific actions as much as the will to do anything, if you want to cheat on your girl it shows she doesn't mean that much to you.. Humans look, you can't not look at a pretty girl and admire her pretty face, but when the thought crosses your mind "if only I was single..." you're already in the wrong..

Don't shove your thoughts into a box and ignore them, bottling them up as if they were never there, be honest with yourself. You should only be in a committed relationship if you really want to be there, not just because you feel the need to make it official. As you grow closer to that special someone, you will become more secure with JUST and ONLY them. You can always look and admire a beautiful woman (provided you're not drooling over you obviously upset partner) but you willing want nothing to do with her other than maybe hang out as friends if you wanted to pursue that.

side note: If you're girl is demanding you have no other female friends in your life, your girl has some insecurities and some issues you two need to address, that sort of mentality is a nice window into what really is her jealousy riddled mind. Nothing that would automatically break the deal for some people, but something none the less that needs to be worked on. "That's just how she is..." isn't a justification. That sort of jealous thinking shouldn't be tolerated on either side. If you're really secure with your relationship then you should be OK with her hanging out with other guys and meeting new boys and pursuing friendships with them. And the same goes for you and new girls.

Just keep everything in the open and be honest about EVERYTHING. Don't try and hide feelings you may be having for somebody else, people have an automatic BULLSHIT detector that you're inevitably going to set off. If you meet somebody else, or she meets another boy, and you(or she) becomes friends with her (or him) and feel more interested in the new person, not just "Oh this is new and exciting yay!" but genuinely feel this new person would be better suited for you to spend your life with, then you need to be honest with your partner and let them know; not be sleazy and cheat.


WELL... I got a little off subject there, but I feel I tied it up nicely. I've been watching too much 'Zero Punctuation' lately..
Mesa Single Rectifier
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Big Baby Taylor Acoustic
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Last edited by touji-za-nai at Oct 23, 2009,
#23
here's a good thought: is it cheating if a girl comes up to you and kisses you on the mouth and you don't really pull back at first because you're surprised?

not saying it's happened to me, but a good (semi)ethical question.
Quote by FatalGear41
I wouldn't call what we have here on the Bass Forum a mentality. It's more like the sharing part of an AA meeting.

Quote by Jason Jillard
HUMANITY WHATS WRONG WITH YOU.


Warwick Fortress>>Acoustic AB50

http://www.myspace.com/rustingbloom
#24
Agree with TS, but only if the peck on the cheek is done in a friendly manner and not a sexual one.
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#25
Quote by speakers
dr phil GTFO


lol, yeah that answer might be a little too heavy for the pit.

Quote by ShallowEndings
Man, you wasted that much energy just to say that?

I didn't read it, so tl;dr


tl;dr?

not sure I could summarize into 1 sentance.. maybe you should stop eating your ass and use that thing inside your 3 inch thick skull and not be so damn lazy.

..again... too much Zero Punctuation lol
Mesa Single Rectifier
Marshall 1960A vintage
Rg3exfm1 w/ EMG 85/81
Big Baby Taylor Acoustic
Ibanez TS808
#26
Quote by the humanity
here's a good thought: is it cheating if a girl comes up to you and kisses you on the mouth and you don't really pull back at first because you're surprised?

not saying it's happened to me, but a good (semi)ethical question.


did you want to kiss her? can you honestly say you were surprised? or were you just unsure of what to do..

not really cheating if nothing inside you said "wut the hel, go fur it! durdurdur'
Mesa Single Rectifier
Marshall 1960A vintage
Rg3exfm1 w/ EMG 85/81
Big Baby Taylor Acoustic
Ibanez TS808
#28
Quote by ShallowEndings
Wow.


Mesa Single Rectifier
Marshall 1960A vintage
Rg3exfm1 w/ EMG 85/81
Big Baby Taylor Acoustic
Ibanez TS808
#30
Quote by touji-za-nai
did you want to kiss her? can you honestly say you were surprised? or were you just unsure of what to do..

not really cheating if nothing inside you said "wut the hel, go fur it! durdurdur'

kinda like 'wtf. I'm being kissed? ummm... what do I do? oh duh, stupid.'

I have never had this happen, but a friend of mine did a few years back and his girlfriend freaked out on him.
Quote by FatalGear41
I wouldn't call what we have here on the Bass Forum a mentality. It's more like the sharing part of an AA meeting.

Quote by Jason Jillard
HUMANITY WHATS WRONG WITH YOU.


Warwick Fortress>>Acoustic AB50

http://www.myspace.com/rustingbloom
#32
Quote by ShallowEndings
That kind of thing happens all the time in movies. Pisses me off. The girl gets all offended and such..

I know. we called him must love dogs for a week.

wasn't very nice
Quote by FatalGear41
I wouldn't call what we have here on the Bass Forum a mentality. It's more like the sharing part of an AA meeting.

Quote by Jason Jillard
HUMANITY WHATS WRONG WITH YOU.


Warwick Fortress>>Acoustic AB50

http://www.myspace.com/rustingbloom
#34
In general, I'd say kiss on the lips and up is cheating, but a lot depends on context.

Quote by the humanity
here's a good thought: is it cheating if a girl comes up to you and kisses you on the mouth and you don't really pull back at first because you're surprised?

not saying it's happened to me, but a good (semi)ethical question.

Actually happened to my girlfriend a couple weeks back, after one of her friends got massively drunk and decided to tell her how he felt about her. I really don't think it's a big deal unless you actually kiss back. And while pulling back once you realize what's going on would probably be good, I still think it'd be funny to just sit completely motionless and stare blankly ahead until the instigating party noticed something was wrong.
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#36
I agree with CoreysMonster, kiss on the lips is the limit. Anything after is cheating.
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#37
Quote by Elden G20
I agree with CoreysMonster, kiss on the lips is the limit. Anything after is cheating.


You stay away from that CoreysMonster!

Even though that is your opinion. Kiss on the lips? I dunno, personally i think that's too far, a kiss on the cheek to say hi or bye is ok but what reason is there to kiss on the lips with someone else in a relationship?
#38
imo it's all cheating. i think sex jokes are fine though, as long as they're not directed toward each other.


My mind is going. I can feel it.
#40
Quote by ShallowEndings
You stay away from that CoreysMonster!

Even though that is your opinion. Kiss on the lips? I dunno, personally i think that's too far, a kiss on the cheek to say hi or bye is ok but what reason is there to kiss on the lips with someone else in a relationship?


To me it depends on how mature you are. For example i kiss my mates gf on the lips to say hello, just because thats a friendly thing to do and we all know each other well.
Quote by dmtransmutation
What the Grunge-haters think is just mindless musical nonsense, in reality is the restoration of the old rule of harmony to not write an entire song in one tonality/key
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