#1
Well here's another masterpiece in the making.

It was my idea to "just" make a metalcore song, like, something generic. But I added some own flavour to it as well to make it, well, less generic!

Anyway here it is, the drums need work (maybe someone could give me some examples of what would sound good with this stuff... All I got now is basically double-bass pounding xD) and the bassline isn't done yet so I muted it. I just need some critique I think.

Well I hope you like this attempt, remember it's still in the making!

~Cheers
Attachments:
orionmetalcoreshit.mid
orionmetalcoreshit.gp5
#2
show me an actual recording or video of you playing this and then we'll talk. Also, you went as far as to put technical stuff, I would suggest losing the generic riffs, that is the only thing that would make it less generic, you have the ability to write cool lead parts, apply that mentality to writing your riffs and this song would be pretty sweet.

That's just my opinion.

P.S. I liked the homage at bar 39, good stuff.
#3
you do have a talent for writing, most of the parts are pretty, there are some generic stuff, originality comes from personal style, and it's quite hard to figure it out on a writing program. now you just gotta play it. plus it really is easier coming across better drums if you have a drummer playing and figuring out stuff with you.
#5
i liked the first solo, sounded kinda neoclassical, but bar 17 really destroyed the feel (sounds like a ad jingle).

again liked the solo (bar 50 onwards), and if ou can play bar 63, mad chops!, the 7/8 chorus was awesome (/me digs oddtimes). and i noticed a lot of times ou don't really pay attention to a scale and use the same (major/minor) 3rd without a scale in the back.

like ^, the riffs are very generic, maybe they work, maybe not, depends on the drummer mostly, the solos are pretty awesome, i just dislike the "hommage bar" and bar 17, i mean protest the hero CAN pull off playing polka for 30 seconds but in generic metalcore, imho you can't, the rest is pretty decent!

thx for the crit!
i love it when you hate the world ~ Zuko
#6
Yea I can basically play everything in there... Pretty good for one year of playing huh ;D

Anyway thanks for the crit, and the homage bar I just thought was pretty cool :P
Anyway I worked on it some more, removed the drums and added some more guitar.

And uhh, what do you mean by not sticking to the scale? Is that bad or good? xD

Anyway here is the new version.
Attachments:
orionmetalcoreshit.mid
orionmetalcoreshit.gp5
#7
this isnt to bad, some of the riffs are kind generic but it slows pretty well. Advice for drums, put in a snare hit on like the third beat of every riff. And keep the cymbal hits on every beat. Not too bad though, actually its pretty good. And when you use the UX2, make sure you read all the threads on the web about reamping and all that kinda stuff, ive heard some really nice reamps with a UX2.
5150 III 100W, Mesa 4x12 Cab, Framus Cobra Cab, M-Audio Profire 610, ISA One Pre, SC607-b, Equator D5's, Countryman Type 85 Di box, Radial JCR, Superior Drummer, SSD 4 Ex, TS9, NS-2 and the list goes on and on
#8
I'd like to know what riffs are considered generic and what not, I guess the intro riff with the cheesy harmonizing is considered generic xD

But I found the 7/8 chorus riff pretty cool, I mean the progression is basic (F-A-D-Bb) but I found the riff I made up with it pretty awesome.

Thanks for the crits so far!
#9
Wow very interesting. I do like the writing aspect of it all, and you can write some great leads! It's impressive to do this in a program like you did. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Also, thanks for your comments on my newest song! I will now rape your thread and ask others to visit this thread https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1221681 and let me know what you think.