#1
srry i deleted my other post in order to create a new one for clarity purposes. But anyways this song is one of my first stabs at songwriting so be easy on me . "Memory" is about what happened to me and my girlfriend and it means alot to me. But tell me what you think and i hope you enjoy reading these lyrics.


Lyrics:
so please
as you leave
just think of me
how we talked to one another
so
so happily
and in the night we lost each other
in
amidst the white
of pale moonlight
we'd forgotten one another
and when
the morning shone
i was alone
and ashamed for what had happened
then
gloomily
you left me
heard your footsteps down the halway
and when
all i thought
that all was lost
i could sit there forever
and cry
then we die
float towards the sky
was it even for the better
then
to my surprise
i realized
that love so great a memory
it was best
to love and lost
at so great a cost
than to never love at all
and that
four letter word
so often heard
could not describe how i am feeling
so please
as you leave
just think of me
so, so happily
Last edited by Firstnamesmusic at Nov 8, 2009,
#2
1) really, I know it's a song and how it looks doesn't matter, but that's a format that won't win you friends over here. I hope you stay around s/l, being a newbie songwriter is great fun over here but look around at the other songs and please please please try and format your lyrics a little better. This is horrdenous on the eyes and people don't generally read horrendous-looking lyrics.

2) I won't say I enjoyed the lyrics (no-ones first ones are of any use). But keep writing and posting, critiquing and learning, reading and living, and it'll improve.

And if this is your first post here, welcome

We're the good guys.
#3
hey thnx man and i will format better. I just wrote it down how i sing it kinda line by line. But thanks man i will keep posting and thnx for the welcome man