#1
C4C

Just getting a few opinions on this that i wrote recently, It's different from what I usually write and doesn't sound too great without vocals, so imagination is needed
Attachments:
Untitled.gp4
Untitled.gp5
Untitled.mid
Quote by UraniYum
Fuck you I'm trying to be caring and shit


Quote by Cb4rabid
Okay guys, I have a confession to make. Not really a confession since it's something that's been bugging me for awhile but I've always been in denial about it.

**** you gilly, it's not what you think
#2
I liked it. Its unique especially that high chordal melody that one of the guitars was doing. the only issue was the drums, they were not very good and didn't fit the song, apart from that I enjoyed, seems to me it would sound a hundred times better on real instruments 8/10 just do something about the drums.
#3
Yeah lol it's very obvious that I'm not a drummer I might actually try recording this just to see how much of a difference it does make
Quote by UraniYum
Fuck you I'm trying to be caring and shit


Quote by Cb4rabid
Okay guys, I have a confession to make. Not really a confession since it's something that's been bugging me for awhile but I've always been in denial about it.

**** you gilly, it's not what you think
#4
If you want then I can redo the drums for you real quick, I minor in drums at college so I could fix it up if you would like. The rest of it was bad ass though
#5
Quote by Nergal22691
If you want then I can redo the drums for you real quick, I minor in drums at college so I could fix it up if you would like. The rest of it was bad ass though


If you don't mind, that would be great. I'm definitely interested to see what someone who knows what they're doing would come up with.
Quote by UraniYum
Fuck you I'm trying to be caring and shit


Quote by Cb4rabid
Okay guys, I have a confession to make. Not really a confession since it's something that's been bugging me for awhile but I've always been in denial about it.

**** you gilly, it's not what you think
#6
Thanks for the crit on mine. This isn't typically what I listen to but I'll give it a go.

As you said, it sounds slightly empty without the vocals only due to the bit of repetition of the song. I also think that MIDI does you no justice and when this is actually recorded you'll get a much better sound, since I noticed you went with some dynamic changes of getting quieter and then building into another part. I personally don't think the riff is amazing, but the lead guitar over it definitely helped to create a darker atmosphere which is good.

I understand that this is done without vocals, but even if I were to picture this with vocals, I think it just takes a bit too long to actually switch into a different riff. I think you should definitely try adding something else before it does eventually change at around 2:30 or so. Not bad, but vocals will be very important to this in my opinion.
#7
Quote by Grimmy101
Thanks for the crit on mine. This isn't typically what I listen to but I'll give it a go.

As you said, it sounds slightly empty without the vocals only due to the bit of repetition of the song. I also think that MIDI does you no justice and when this is actually recorded you'll get a much better sound, since I noticed you went with some dynamic changes of getting quieter and then building into another part. I personally don't think the riff is amazing, but the lead guitar over it definitely helped to create a darker atmosphere which is good.

I understand that this is done without vocals, but even if I were to picture this with vocals, I think it just takes a bit too long to actually switch into a different riff. I think you should definitely try adding something else before it does eventually change at around 2:30 or so. Not bad, but vocals will be very important to this in my opinion.


Thanks
I did think twice about posting this because much of it (especially the verse) would be very vocally driven.
I also agree that the midi sounds like crap and C# is maybe a bit low to hear the bass (and some guitar) when it's played in midi.
Thanks for the critique and I'll keep working on it .
Quote by UraniYum
Fuck you I'm trying to be caring and shit


Quote by Cb4rabid
Okay guys, I have a confession to make. Not really a confession since it's something that's been bugging me for awhile but I've always been in denial about it.

**** you gilly, it's not what you think
#9
Quote by Nergal22691
Here's the revised drums. I hope you like it. It may be a bit busier than you would like in the softer section and if so i can change it up. Just let me know what you think



that's interesting and obviously well written... but I'm still not sure. Argh, I think I just get too picky with the things I write lol
Quote by UraniYum
Fuck you I'm trying to be caring and shit


Quote by Cb4rabid
Okay guys, I have a confession to make. Not really a confession since it's something that's been bugging me for awhile but I've always been in denial about it.

**** you gilly, it's not what you think
Last edited by gilly_90 at Nov 8, 2009,
#10
Reminds me of music from badass old-school fps games like doom and quake.

The bass definitly drives a lot of it, which is great. The drums sound kinda weird without much snare use, but I find the bass drums really work well with the bass guitar in making a deep, rumbling, "living" kinda vibe.

Anyways, great stuff. The only reccomendations I would have is maybe a few lead lines during the main riff and/or the quiet riff.
#11
I'm not really into doom metal, but I thought this piece was pretty good. The only part I didn't like was the riff starting at 74; it just didn't work for me.
#12
Thanks for the crit again

Let's get this going.
First off all.. it's way too repetitive for my taste.. but that's the genre i think. But what's really nice.. is the friggin ambience.. Sooo dark man.. It's like i sense my impending doom. You did a great job creating the atmosphere.. well done.
The lead chords are mostly responisble for that. nice job

I can imagine it being vocal driven. With vocals it's probably way better.
The second drums made by the guy who minors in drums are better. but a bit too busy. anyway a much needed upgrade on the drumming part.

overall well done!!!
keep working at it though. I think you can make it way better!
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#13
yeah i think that they may be too busy in the softer section, I'll fix that when I get the chance