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#1
I searchbared: calm down, and went though the 1st 3 of 9 pages and didnnt find what i wanted to know.

So its been bought to my attention that i need to calm the **** down. I worry about things way too much and always say sorry (its a habit. i just like feel bad for someone, or i do something wrong and ill instantly say sorry without thinking)

So i got in a bit of an argument with my girlfriend last night (tell me to go relationship thread, and ill kick your dick in) and she said you worry way too much about everything, and you always say sorry, and its getting on my nerves.

So i had a think about it today, and realized she is right. I need to know how to not takes things so hard, calm down, and not be so sympathetic, especially for everything i do.

The only thing i know that calms me down and lets me stop thinking about anything is either getting high, but when im coming off my high, i get really depressed. Or (dont flame me) listening to Motley Crue.

Its only those 2 things that not make me worry about things. No other band does that.


So to my point, what are some good methods of allowing me to relax, not take things so hard, dont let other peoples moods affect mine, stop saying sorry so much, and most importantly, not worry about everything.

Any help is really appreciated, it will probably save my relationship (once again, this isnt just about me and my girlfriend, its about me in general, so dont tell me go relationship thread, im about to go there with another problem)
#3
basically you just need to learn to calm down,there is no big secret to it.
Don't get into the habit of smoking to get away from your problems,i had a friend like that and notice i said had. You wont end up where you want to be.
#5
Weed?
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#6
Quote by Erik_Aero
(Invalid img)
Motley Crue...

Dick, im asking for help.

Quote by crzywhiteboy
basically you just need to learn to calm down,there is no big secret to it.
Don't get into the habit of smoking to get away from your problems,i had a friend like that and notice i said had. You wont end up where you want to be.

So just try my hardest to let things go and forget about it?

Quote by Le_Bunny
Therapy.


Seriously.

I could go back school councilor, but he knows nothing, and tells my parents everything when they say they wont.

Quote by NearDissent
Weed?

I dont wanna be high all the time, and i cant afford it.
Last edited by maiden03 at Nov 9, 2009,
#8
It's all in your head. Chill out. Your attitude is the one thing in life you always have control over (supposing you don't have some sort of mental illness).
Quote by dudetheman
So what? I wasted like 5 minutes watching DaddyTwoFoot's avatar.


Metalheads are the worst thing that ever happened to metal.
#11
I have the same issue....Well, had. I got nervous and frantic all the time.
Counting in your head and slowing your breathing pattern really helps.
If you are nervous or berserk in any way, slowly count to ten or whatever number helps, slow down your breathing, and you will be more calm.
#12
Quote by Carlos Again
play your guitar dude?

Cant do that in public, or when with her (i can, i just choose to spend the time with her)

Quote by mrcrono
Masturbate. I'm not joking.

I have her for that, i dont masturbate anymore (not kidding, i stopped) and once again, cant do it in public

Quote by Pagan_Poetry
I have the same issue....Well, had. I got nervous and frantic all the time.
Counting in your head and slowing your breathing pattern really helps.
If you are nervous or berserk in any way, slowly count to ten or whatever number helps, slow down your breathing, and you will be more calm.

So simple breathing exercises, or maybe some Buddhist/monk stuff? (no offense)
#13
Quote by Pagan_Poetry
I have the same issue....Well, had. I got nervous and frantic all the time.
Counting in your head and slowing your breathing pattern really helps.
If you are nervous or berserk in any way, slowly count to ten or whatever number helps, slow down your breathing, and you will be more calm.

Probably this, But I'm no Dr. Phil

#14
i worry alot too, but i dont say sorry, im the "no" guy. hey lets do this! no. ive hardly ever let my decision cave in. its cuz im worried, but as a fellow smoker, ive prolly saved my self or friends from an arrest or two over the years. i cant count the times ive let my friends go smoke in some risky place and i just wait til they get back. no ones ever called me a pussy for it tho, cuz u can still be worried, but just show it in a different way where people wont think ur a pussy. some day not worrying will come back and bite those people who dont worry in the ass.

tho i do admit it gets in the way at times. still, an ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure.
#15
dude, I think you might be my long lost twin. You basically described me.
But I've been watching some recent videos
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dwICEMGHK60

This guy steve has some pretty cool stuff to say, and even though I don't agree with everything he says, he makes some great points. Some of his videos have helped me relax and just enjoy life a little bit more. I still have a lot of problems with worrying all the time, and I'm always apologizing, but I've gotten better. It just takes practice
Last edited by 13579ed at Jan 20, 2010,
#16
I used to have a really hot head until I started taking everything less seriously. I realized how silly everything just is. Just pretend that you're the protagonist of a movie and you want the audience to know how cool you are =P

The downside is that I haven't studied for my exams and they've already started
#17
Quote by WantsLesPaul
Probably this, But I'm no Dr. Phil



Fortunately, I am Scudworth.
Eh, close enough.


And yeah, it's similar to some Buddhist techniques but not quite. But in all honesty it really works.
#20
cigarettes?
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#21
There are many breathing exercises in Yoga, Budism, and even Satanism that are said to help people relax.

Personally I've tried some of the Satanism exercises, and although they are mainly used to enter meditative states before performing rituals, for magic and other purposes, i find they are very calming and allow you to see things in many ways that you probably otherwise would not.
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#24
Learn to calm yourself when you feel anxious or worried, like the breathing thing

also learn to look at things you worry about logically and a lot of times you'll find it's not wort worrying over, just chillax, take a deep breath and forget about it
Warning: The above post may contain lethal levels of radiation, sharp objects and sexiness.
Proceed with extreme caution!
#26
You guys rock, and the vid "shoulda, Coulda, Woulda" is great.

Im not dating your ex to the guy back a bit.

But seriously, i really think some of this could work, thanks heaps guys
#28
Yeah man, I'm very similiar to you. I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and get really, really obsessed with tiny details and it's really hard to cope sometimes. None of my friends really know how much it effects me but it's definetly a huge part of my life and makes me really depressed and miserable a lot of the time. As for the weed, that makes it better as well as alcohol, but only TEMPORARILY. Afterwards I usually get more depressed than I was before so I'm going to try stopping doing both. I'm also very cynical and negative which is hard, but I'm trying to change this. Anyway bro, for advice I'd suggest just taking things slowly and not trying to do everything at once. I've got a friend just like you who apologizes over EVERYTHING and after a while it just gets annoying, so seriously man just don't apologize unless it's really necessary because your true friends won't hold grudges or hold it against you anyway. If they do, they aren't good friends in the first place. You could also try meditation, it's really relaxing, I started doing it about 4 months ago. Try to set aside like 10-15mins a day and just sit down somewhere really quiet and comfortable and close your eyes and take deep breaths and try to empty your head of everything, just think black. It's hard at first but gets easier with time.

I wish you the best of luck man, you should write back sometime to tell us how you went.
You are like a hurricane
There's calm in your eye.
And I'm gettin' blown away
To somewhere safer
where the feeling stays.
I want to love you but
I'm getting blown away.
#29
Quote by estranged_g_n_r
Yeah man, I'm very similiar to you. I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and get really, really obsessed with tiny details and it's really hard to cope sometimes. None of my friends really know how much it effects me but it's definetly a huge part of my life and makes me really depressed and miserable a lot of the time. As for the weed, that makes it better as well as alcohol, but only TEMPORARILY. Afterwards I usually get more depressed than I was before so I'm going to try stopping doing both. I'm also very cynical and negative which is hard, but I'm trying to change this. Anyway bro, for advice I'd suggest just taking things slowly and not trying to do everything at once. I've got a friend just like you who apologizes over EVERYTHING and after a while it just gets annoying, so seriously man just don't apologize unless it's really necessary because your true friends won't hold grudges or hold it against you anyway. If they do, they aren't good friends in the first place. You could also try meditation, it's really relaxing, I started doing it about 4 months ago. Try to set aside like 10-15mins a day and just sit down somewhere really quiet and comfortable and close your eyes and take deep breaths and try to empty your head of everything, just think black. It's hard at first but gets easier with time.

I wish you the best of luck man, you should write back sometime to tell us how you went.

Oh man, sorry about your condition

But you had some awesome advice, especially the 15 minute alone time. That will really help. Thanks heaps.
#30
Making a thread about how you need to calm down isn't a good place to start, in all seriousness. You are worrying about worrying right now, and doing so will only make you less calm. I say you just try to forget about it, and chill out.
Castles made of sand
Fall to the sea
Eventually
#31
your problem is that you take life to seriously, you have to realize its all just a sad joke and instead of letting people make you mad or sad or happy just laugh at them, and when something makes you worry just remember its a bad joke and laugh at it
#32
dude i think if your gonna get high, just do it once a week preferably wednesday arvo, coz that rocks bro!
DAVE FOR PRESIDENT!!!
#33
Quote by KnoT03
dude i think if your gonna get high, just do it once a week preferably wednesday arvo, coz that rocks bro!

WTF!

I did it on Wednesday once with my mate and my girlfriend!

This shits fuct massive!
#34
Just actively try not to say sorry about things.

As far as not worrying, I don't know what to say. I've never had that problem. Just train yourself to relax, I guess.
Quote by BeefWellington

what's the point in being "philiosophical"?

Interesting question...
#35
Im gonna try as many of these as i can as soon as possible.

Obviously, im not gonna try start shit, and get worried and try get past it, but if an opportunity arises (god forbid) ill put one into action.
#36
Quote by maiden03



So just try my hardest to let things go and forget about it?


Pretty much, consider if something is actually worth worrying about before doing it, because you should only really worry about the big things.
WHOMP

Think of that next time you are not allowed to laugh.
#37
Quote by maiden03
WTF!

I did it on Wednesday once with my mate and my girlfriend!

This shits fuct massive!


hahahahahah im that mate bro
DAVE FOR PRESIDENT!!!
#38
Quote by donender
Pretty much, consider if something is actually worth worrying about before doing it, because you should only really worry about the big things.

Ok, thanks guys, you really did help alot this time (well you always do for me and its awesome)

Oh and hey Lachlan
#39
TS, when people have problems in relationships, they often have a problem in themself that needs to be worked on, and this is a situation that often comes about in the RT. Also, you're guaranteed an intelligent and thoughtful response in that thread, so yeah, you should post it there.
O what a disgrace if such a despised and base race, which worships demons, should conquer a people which has the faith of omnipotent God and is made glorious with the name of Christ!

The music winners listen to
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