#1
First time I've ever written a series like this. It was one giant thing but I broke it up. There's five parts.

there was that one time,
I was just beginning to love cars, and
you told me that the Mercedes Gullwing was the most beautiful car ever made,
you showed me pictures and said if you could have one car, that would be it.
I thought it was ugly with those doors sticking up in the air like that,
but I didn't say that. I said "yeah, that's pretty cool."
and went back to daydreaming about ferraris and lamborghinis and bugatis.
you would tell me "boy, when we win the lotto I'm going to buy an old shelby cobra kit car,
and we can build it together."
They were kinda ugly, too.They looked old and slow.
But I didn't say that. I just said "Okay, that would be cool."
You said "There's a guy in Arizona,
he owns a racing school. They let you drive Corvettes.
One day we will go there."
I said "Okay",
knowing you would never be able to take me.
And that's all I ever said. All I ever really said.
Today I feel electric grey
I hope tomorrow, neon black
#3
I'm reading
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#4
^


Quote by Sandor138
so basically you're gay for cars?


Brilliant. I didn't think anyone would pick up on that.

You'll find through reading the whole series that I'm gay for much more than cars. In fact, I'll give you a hint. The title of part 4 is "Sandor138", and that part is pretty much lyrics to a power metal love ballad. The title of the final, most important part is "John McCain and aeroplanes.", and it's just a giant word-orgy of me describing my uncontrollable lust for unsuccesful presidential candidates and flying hunks of metal. It's genius, I think. You'll just have to wait and see though.
Today I feel electric grey
I hope tomorrow, neon black
#5
I'm not sure if I really like this or if I'm just indifferent to it. I didn't really feel sad about the lost promise and i'm not sure about the dialogue if it connected with me.

it's not bad I guess and it's written well. I can't really comment on anything here, I didn't find it engaging by itself.

wine cellar could do with a crit
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1228629
Last edited by Hendrix_fan_14 at Nov 10, 2009,