#1
hey guys i need to write an autobiography that has at least 5 stories in my life that have been significant. my teacher is a bitch and i just want to come up with five random stories that will blow her mind.

the only one i have so far is the day that Wendy's doublestack came out, my life was changed.

any ideas?
Gear:
Musicman Stingray 4 string HH
Tech 21 Sansamp Para Driver
Ampeg V-4B
Ampeg SVT-212AV 2x12

Gibson SG Standard
Vox AC15
Keeley compressor
Keeley Dark Side
Boss RC-2 Loop
Korg Pandora
Crybaby Wah
#2
Talk about the time you invaded Canada riding a white tiger while dressed as a Spartan.
#4
"It felt like my head was in a vice. I mean, seriously, shit, that stung enough, but then I was dragged out of the warm dark wet place into a really bright cold room, and then this lady slapped me on the ass. I mean what the ****?"
#5
When you invented the spoon.
Quote by ChadLikesGuitar
even now, an 8 year old could go download gorilla rape porn and jack off to it.
#8
When Rick Astley taught you that he will never, ever, under no circumstances give you up.

Epiphone Les Paul Standard w/ SD Alnico Pro II's
Fender Aerodyne Telecaster & Stratocaster
Marshall JCM 800 4104 combo


E-Married to Funny_Page
#9
Quote by herby190
Talk about the time you invaded Canada riding a white tiger while dressed as a Spartan.



im liking this one
Gear:
Musicman Stingray 4 string HH
Tech 21 Sansamp Para Driver
Ampeg V-4B
Ampeg SVT-212AV 2x12

Gibson SG Standard
Vox AC15
Keeley compressor
Keeley Dark Side
Boss RC-2 Loop
Korg Pandora
Crybaby Wah
#10
tell her about how you and your buddies saw a pink floyd show whilst under the influence of lsd and how it blew your mind!
“I am 100 percent in favor of the intelligent use of drugs, and 1,000 percent against the thoughtless use of them, whether caffeine or LSD. And drugs are not central to my life.”

-Dr. Timothy Leary
#11
Tell her about that bitch teacher that made you write a fake autobiography so you could blow her mind
#13
Describe in detail the time your guinea pigs ate one of your gerbils. Then end it with "...so the morale of the story is..."
Quote by ghostnineone
i got my guitar caught in my ceiling fan today

guitars fine though
#14
How one time you went into a different dimension and all this crazy stuff happened but it was really a dream.


Quote by mattman93
This, atheists talk about religion more then religious people.

Youtube
#17
Tell 5 stories about the week you got half an once of dank. The doublestack could be worked in there.
#18
the time you knocked out Elvis and had sex with a polar bear all in one night
Yours Sincerely,


Dr. Speakers
#19
Quote by Bobinedefil
Describe in detail the time your guinea pigs ate one of your gerbils. Then end it with "...so the morale of the story is..."



i am considering this. what should the moral be?
Gear:
Musicman Stingray 4 string HH
Tech 21 Sansamp Para Driver
Ampeg V-4B
Ampeg SVT-212AV 2x12

Gibson SG Standard
Vox AC15
Keeley compressor
Keeley Dark Side
Boss RC-2 Loop
Korg Pandora
Crybaby Wah
#20
talk about the time you made a thread in the pit asking what you should talk about in your autobiography

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#21
talk about the time one of your old best freinds came out at you, and how it was difficult to accept,
or how you used to live with your grandparents as your parents were missionaries. and they were poor and they roasted a chicken over an open fire fireplace ( true about my grandparents)
#22
The morale should be completely senseless and ridiculous. for example:

And the morale of the story is, never throw your gum out while you're wearing a turtleneck
Quote by ghostnineone
i got my guitar caught in my ceiling fan today

guitars fine though
#23
Tell her the time you fought a T-rex with the power of rock & roll or just randomly tell her of the time you flew into space and stop the gigantic fist of kordomos from hitting the earth and after you laid hell yeah any story that involes getting laid is a good story
______________
KILL BTBAM!!!!! Lamma says: IM GOING TO SEE MEGADETH SLAYER AND TESTAMENT **** YEAH
#24
Quote by Oroborous
Tell her about that bitch teacher that made you write a fake autobiography so you could blow her mind

nothing could be better than this


also, tell her about the time you blew up disney studios tomorow. But this one you must not just say, you must do....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bands I must see in concert
Silvertide
The Black Crowes
Jackyl
Black Stone Cherry
AC/DC
StoneRider
Freedomhawk
The Darkness and/or the sideprojects of the band members
Buckcherry
The Answer

Theres more. But those are the main ones
#25
pull a rasputin and tell her you were touched by the virgin mary!

Or the time you and jesus boosted a car and were chased by 12 patrol cars and finally were stopped when they used spike strips on your tires
“I am 100 percent in favor of the intelligent use of drugs, and 1,000 percent against the thoughtless use of them, whether caffeine or LSD. And drugs are not central to my life.”

-Dr. Timothy Leary
Last edited by eL SeaweeD at Nov 19, 2009,
#26
Tell her about the time you banged the teacher for an easy 'A'. Tape a condom to the back of the paper.
#27
Quote by bendystraw
Tell her about the time you banged the teacher for an easy 'A'. Tape a condom to the back of the paper.

@nd best, right up there wit the bitch teacher one
Bands I must see in concert
Silvertide
The Black Crowes
Jackyl
Black Stone Cherry
AC/DC
StoneRider
Freedomhawk
The Darkness and/or the sideprojects of the band members
Buckcherry
The Answer

Theres more. But those are the main ones
#28
Tell her about the time where you had to fight communist ninjas that broke into your house and had to travel into the future to save us all from 2012 from dust mites.