#1
I just uploaded a song ive been working on for a bit. Its on my profile as "Nidra":

http://profile.ultimate-guitar.com/Will+Terhart/

Recording quality isnt the greatest because im using a terrible mic but im still curious about what people think of the lyrics and my singing technique (also lyrics, theyre on there) . I used adobe audition 3.0 . Definetly c4c, just let me know (link or profile)
#2
I had trouble making out some of the lyrics but for the most part I liked them. Your singing was great, I like your voice. The backing vocals that came in later were a nice touch. I actually think the quality is decent for the mood of the song...if that makes sense. The guitar has a nice mellow tone.

BTW, I listened to your wagon wheel cover - it was good! I thought it was bit more reminiscent of Bob Dylan's orig than Old Crow but both are great versions so you can't go wrong

Mind giving my song a crit?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1234954
Last edited by elementwood89 at Nov 23, 2009,
#3
I definitely hear some cool ideas in the chord progression, but I think it could be focused better. There are times where the chord progression limits the effectiveness of the melody. There were a couple chords I really wished you'd played longer and sang more notes over, because I thought they were very interesting. Your voice and technique sound pretty good, reminds me of the bassist in Wild Beasts.

As for the lyrics, from a sonic standpoint, I think the rhyming words should be closer together, because as it is the rhymes are not very clear because they're so spread out. I think this song has potential, it's unique, but it needs rearranging to really shine. It currently sounds like the focus is not clear enough.


Care to check out my song? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=22393357#post22393357
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#4
I'd like to hear some breathing room between between "phrases" and parts, as it is now you have the intro and then it's an unbroken string of vocals for the rest of the song. Since you have 4 rounds of the progression for the first verse I'd throw in a little musical pause about halfway. Might be nice to have some kind of new idea right after the second chorus too just to break the relative monotony of the piece.
"If money is the root of all evil, I'd like to be a bad, bad man."

- Huey Lewis & the News
#5
Good stuff, the recordings quite dry but it suits the piece pretty well and gives it a great and individual feel. The vocals - good, the guitar - good. Very decent song.

I'd love to hear it with a bit of variation towards the end, the backing vocals are pleasant but it feels like there isn't really a break or something else to capture people - like some sort of hook.

What's there is good though, I'll check out more when its not so late for sure.

Mind leaving a thought on one of mine?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1228208



Abe
#7
On second listen, the 'keep your heads up, keep your eyes closed' part could pass as a hook - it's very singable. Maybe, lean a bit more of the phrasing that way??