#1
Hey folks, I just put another new song on myspace. I'm aware that the drum programming is REALLY simple but I'm lazy today so I'll probably work on a final version another day. I hope you like it!! Crit4crit as always. Thanks!!


http://myspace.com/deathbedvisions
Last edited by v2a2n2g2 at Nov 29, 2009,
#2
Your guitar is pretty off-rhythm, it doesnt sound like its the playing thats off but rather the placement of them tracks. Your vocals are well done for this style but they need to be louder in the mix (almost impossible to hear in some places), and I would take off the distortion (if thats what it is). The clean part that starts around 2:00 is pretty cool but the tone is really thin(almost sounds like midi), unlike your rhythm tone.

c4c?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1237382
#3
I agree with the with Will Terhart about the guitars being off-rhythm, and you can barely hear the vocals. I bet the song would be much better if you could hear them.

Also, in your about me section you put the word doesn't two times in a row, just figured I'd tell you.
#4
Its not really my cup of tea but I enjoyed it.

I agree with these guys vocals need to be louder and the song generally needs polishing up abit. Also it sound quite weak if you know what I mean, it hasn't really got that "in your face" kind of metal tone.

So work on the tone and mixing I guess :p
#5
hmm. not my style for sure. the rythem sounded allright to me. i think vocals need to be louder, and the track gets a little too long. i would re-record this live with a real drummer and session guys ect. shell out the cash for this. i think it has potential but needs allot of work. not bad by any means though.

crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=22442889#post22442889
#6
Very interesting piece. There's plenty here that I'm not sure I agree with, but that's what experimental music is all about, so good job there, haha! Composition style aside, I am enjoying the piece, the clean section really is quite pleasing on the ears, and it reminds me of sikth in places, which is always good too. The vocals sound pretty good, so I'd have to say bring em out in front of the mix a bit more.

All the riffs have something special about them, so another plus point there. I have to say though, the mix is sounding very rough at the moment. It seems like you've got the right amount of warmth in it, which is good, and the actual balance between the instruments is mostly alright, but the guitars really could do with being smoother and a bit more lively., and the drums need a little more presence like in "Ride the Dunes" that you've got up on your page. For the guitars, you might have to just look to your equipment for answers, rather than what you're doing in the mix, to be honest.

But yes, bring those vocals up! And respect for the song - it is very good, a little more work should allow it to reach it's full potential!

If you get the chance, check out mine
My Bands




Latest Original Recording
#8
hey thanks for the crit.

i think track is well composed, however the recording and mastering of the track has really let it down, the guitar tone was really harsh and muddy.
the vocals at the moment dont really suit the song but i think with some good mastering and production they would. i did really like the clean part starting at 2mins ish, i think the lead in tht part is played in the bridge pick, to me it would sound better on the neck pickup for a fuller tone.

other than that work on the guitar tone and mastering/production

cheers james
#9
hey sorry it took so long for me to crit i just really didnt feel like it until now lol

but yeah it was a cool track but that first clean part seem to go on for way too long
also the tracks were off rythm at some parts and stuff like others have said
so yeah im done later lol