#1
This is a new song of mine that I have recently written. This is more progressive then death metal in a way so don't get to hung up on the genre. This is a rough demo of the song and there are a few things that I have to fix up but I really hope you like and as always, C4C.

Attachments:
Human.gp4
Human.gp5
Human.mid
#2
I really like verse and chorus. Verse 1.5 was better than verse. Chorus 1.5 weren't as good as chorus. Bridge is pretty boring... U really play guitar in verse II? If u do plz put a video from it into youtube ! well it was pretty good too. Calm part was nice but when tempo goes to 115 it turns bad. Clean change was good until second guitar. Didn't like outro really.
I would give it 6½/10. Didn't like song very much but it had nice parts.
#3
really awesome stuff here

reminds me of Gojira in a lot of places, some sort of cross-over between Gojira and Death, which off course equals pure awesomeness...

Nothing wrong, everything is nicely put together

Starts off nice and strong with the verse, Chorus I would be awesome with some vocals (which I'm presuming it will get)
I like the change from single notes to those harmonized chords at the end of bar 1 and 3 (of 4 bars) and so on in Verse 1.5
The change to higher chords in Chorus 1.5 is also very nice
The transition fits very well, bridge is also nice, and I like that the bassline has some extra notes as opposed to the guitar..
Nothing wrong with Verse II, and the repeating of the bridge and the verse imao fits well, even though I think some people might find it a tad repetitive

The change to the clean part (bar 115/116) sounds a bit too sudden, but I really like the clean part
At bar 141 the distorted guitar goes well with it, though the timing of the chords (on the first beat) kinda seems to throw me off the rhythm for a moment..
The clean change sounds good, though the change to bar 157 with only one guitar remaining makes it sounds empty, especially with the distorted guitar stopping at bar 156..
Adding the distorted guitar back goes well
Outro sounds great and reminds me a lot of Oroborus from Gojira
I do think you should do something more with the last bar, you keep the drums continuing for 1 bar and let the guitar ring on for the remaining 4 bars, but I think it would be better if you let the drums go on a couple bars more (perhaps with some fills or something) and let the guitar end at the same time as the drums

All in all, damn good song

EDIT:

@ guy above me:

In Verse 2 those notes may be fast, but it's not impossible, I mean, I can get it at that tempo, and I'm not what you say a guitar-virtuoso...
Tiger got to hunt, bird got to fly; man got to sit and wonder, 'Why, why, why?'
Tiger got to sleep, bird got to land; man got to tell himself he understand.


Last edited by ultimate-slash at Nov 29, 2009,
#4
Quote by ultimate-slash
really awesome stuff here

reminds me of Gojira in a lot of places, some sort of cross-over between Gojira and Death, which off course equals pure awesomeness...

Nothing wrong, everything is nicely put together

Starts off nice and strong with the verse, Chorus I would be awesome with some vocals (which I'm presuming it will get)
I like the change from single notes to those harmonized chords at the end of bar 1 and 3 (of 4 bars) and so on in Verse 1.5
The change to higher chords in Chorus 1.5 is also very nice
The transition fits very well, bridge is also nice, and I like that the bassline has some extra notes as opposed to the guitar..
Nothing wrong with Verse II, and the repeating of the bridge and the verse imao fits well, even though I think some people might find it a tad repetitive

The change to the clean part (bar 115/116) sounds a bit too sudden, but I really like the clean part
At bar 141 the distorted guitar goes well with it, though the timing of the chords (on the first beat) kinda seems to throw me off the rhythm for a moment..
The clean change sounds good, though the change to bar 157 with only one guitar remaining makes it sounds empty, especially with the distorted guitar stopping at bar 156..
Adding the distorted guitar back goes well
Outro sounds great and reminds me a lot of Oroborus from Gojira
I do think you should do something more with the last bar, you keep the drums continuing for 1 bar and let the guitar ring on for the remaining 4 bars, but I think it would be better if you let the drums go on a couple bars more (perhaps with some fills or something) and let the guitar end at the same time as the drums

All in all, damn good song

EDIT:

@ guy above me:

In Verse 2 those notes may be fast, but it's not impossible, I mean, I can get it at that tempo, and I'm not what you say a guitar-virtuoso...


Gojira and Death are big influences of mines. Especially, Gojira


Thanks for the crit.
Last edited by The Arsis at Nov 29, 2009,
#6
Crit as i listen.

Riffs until verse 1.5 are quite good .They sound pretty heavey when i played it with the right amp settings and distortion effects.Maybe if they were 2-3 dissonance chords would sound better but thats just my taste and i dont know what is your idea for the song.

Verse 1.5...now thats what im talking about.No serious critics for this part exept maybe after the F/F chord try to do the second guitar with an F on the same string when you play the open D rythm.

Chorus 1.5 now i didn't like that part.Here should be the place of some fast riff with faster drums ,but not blastbeats

Bridge and Verse 2 parts are okay i have no critics for it .

Clean part surprised me.I wasn't expecting that.Maybe if you add some kind of break before it will be better with suitable transition ofcourse.I liked the riff when the clean part changed .It reminded me of some immortal clean parts -10 points for that. The guitar chords after that were killer too.

Outro-No critics.Sounds too good to me

7/10 overall because in some parts at the begining and at the middle riffs get repetive and i was little bit bored.Pretty nice song is my final opinion.Keep up writing like that
#7
Pretty good. Only able to listen to the Midi file ATM, so I can't see what goes into it, only what comes out.

Good Orchestration throughout. Too many repeating sections, I hope you could thin them out once you get lyrics, but It just seems to drag on after awhile. Too slow paced I would say?

Nothing wrong with it, theres just not too much Intensity with it, its more of a groove thing.

7/10 IMO. Try bumping up the tempo just a tad in places, perhaps that would get it rolling better.

TechEdit: Arsis, would you mind Collabing with me for a bit? I could use some help with the rythym under the Solo in Baptism of Blades. Ive got some Ideas, but a second persons take at how it should go would help alot. Mind spending a few minutes Helping me?

If you do decide, just repost the Song onto the thread. You can cut out the softer solo bit if you want, And If I really want the part, I'll just stitch it back in, Around what you added.
Last edited by Life Is Brutal at Dec 10, 2009,
#8
seemed really long and slow paced to me, like it was dragging along. I liked the clean part, sounded a lot like something Opeth would do, pretty sweet. Also pretty repetitive with that original/opening riff
Kurzweil K2500xs
#9
Quote by ~Flounder~
seemed really long and slow paced to me, like it was dragging along. I liked the clean part, sounded a lot like something Opeth would do, pretty sweet. Also pretty repetitive with that original/opening riff



I have seen to much fast and tremolo like riffs on this site. Almost everyone writes riffs that are fast paced and it just gets boring to me. I wanted to write something slow and powerful and more vocally driven. Thanks for the crits guys
#10
Right into the verse. Good way to start a song.
Chorus needs a bit more to get me hooked. Just seemed so empty.
Bridge, yet again needs something more. You should add some sort of riff to the chorus and the bridge, it just needs a bit more.
Clean part was interesting. Yet again was lacking that feel, maybe needs a few higher chords, a few chromatic licks? Goes on too long.
I liked the clean change though. Outro needs a solo. Just needs it.

Maybe this song would be a bit more interesting with vocals. But right now it's a bit empty to me.
#11
Quote by The Arsis
Anymore crits? C4C

its a good solid metal song man, the intro made me want to punch my fist in time with the song, its a solid punchy riff.

i felt the clean part was a bit drawn out, i think you could have halved it even. but i really did enjoy it, its a good contrast section.

overall, nice piece of music man, it has some very memorable moments
#12
Like verse 1, but are those really fast bassdrum bursts, necessairy. Chorus one is nice, you would be able to fit some nice vocals over there. Verse 1.5 and CHorus 1.5 are nice again. The pinch harmonic sound of guitar pro made me laugh though xD. Bridge is ok not really special, Verse 2 is nice. At the second bridge I'm kind of getting the bridge, sounds pretty good now. That tempo change and change to clean came rather sudden, that part is okay, together with the bridge and verse 2 it's really building some atmosphere. Bar 125, kind of reminds me of Rhime of the ancient mariner by Iron Maiden, reminds me of the happy bass part after like the interlude (if you know Maiden). Really like the direction of things at this point, curious at what you're going to do next with the song. Clean change sounds nice, not really sure on the part at 165. Would sound really nice with phaser as you suggest, the outro is pretty epic.

Nice song, really liked it!
Guitasr:
Cort KX-Custom
ESP LTD M-200FM
Amp:
Engl Powerball
Misc:
Focusrite Scarlet 2i4