Ok, so i've been playing years and years and my ear has been really developing in the last tow, so i've become really frustrated with how sloppy my playing is, i.e my two hands are not in time at all, meaning i mute certain notes in a lick. So i've been dealing with this carefully, training myself to lift off perfectly in time. But now arises the problem that my lifting off causes the string to ring! I've read lessons and it says for that problem that you should just train your fingers to relax rather than lift off, but that brings back the first problem again!!

UG what should i do? any tips because i'm incredibly frustrated at the moment!

I agree. Don´t make such a big deal out of it, like just do it and feel it ... relax and have your fingers tight and exact at the same time. just pull the tone off
If it were as simple as just doing it i would have done it by now. I learned to play sloppily and now I'm being a perfectionist so i want all my notes to ring clearly. Just i'm really struggling to make any progress!
When he says just do it he doesn't mean that it will just happen. He means that it will only happen after practice and time. There isn't anything special you have to do. Just put in the hours. It takes a long time to become able to play really clean.