#1
Hey all!

This piece was originally intended for a music class composition task, centered on Theme and Variation. We had to write one theme, and vary it using different compositional techniques.
Influences stem from Final Fantasy, Battles (the band), and various online puzzle games, along with nuisances from my own usual methods of writing (silly meters, counter melodies/rhythms).

Crit for crit as always (the more you write, the more I write, of course!), and while I'm of course more than happy to receive criticism on what's here so far, I'd really appreciate any advice on where I can take this next, or if there are any sections that could be included to bridge existing sections, etc. (I'm already thinking of including another short bridge before the second piano theme, ''Saloon'').

Just a couple quick notes! 37 onwards is just a bunch of ideas conjured up, and if the levels of the instruments don't sound right from your speakers (mine are sorely lacking bass, hence their frightening UBER-LEVEL) please feel free to throw them around.

Thanks in advance to anybody replies, and please leave a link to a thread of yours for a returned crit. Cheers!



Alex
Attachments:
14. Quaint, 7-8.gp5
14. Quaint, 7-8 gp4.gp4
14. Quaint, 7-8 MIDI.mid
Last edited by juckfush at Dec 4, 2009,
#2
lol that was freaking awesome, i used to play final fantasy and this sounds legit. I like the main theme and the saloon. Me and my roommate are sitting here smiling because it sounds so awesome. great job. My roommate said he wants to have your babies.

could you crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1238570
thanks
Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
#3
I'm not much of a gamer, but that was quite a fun listen. Very amusing, playful melody. Definitely something I could hear in a video game. Nice work.
#4
I've actually listened to everything in your sig, but have never bothered to crit any of it. It won't be as in depth as yours was...

First off, I don't really notice all the time sig changes, which is good - It gets a bit simpler (straight 4/4) at bar 9, but honestly, I didn't notice that until now.

I love the acoustic guitar in part C.

The layering throughout is amazing. Tracks 5-8 add a lot to the atmosphere without overpowering anything else.

The only thing I don't love is part E. The tempo change was cool, but other than that nothing about it really stood out. It also seemed a complete... departure from the feeling the song had before. I guess its effectiveness really depends on what the song is about, or what it'd be used for in a game.

Maybe the fact that I've listened to it a lot by now is... dampening my awe at the song. I'm pretty sure when I first heard it I was blown away. I can't really say how you could improve it, or what you should do after.
#5
Very good work, you should start making music to runescape or something, they get well paid ! Seriously haven't got much to crit, very very professional work! I loved your acoustic guitar line, it was just awesome. Every instrument line have been well thinked, awesome mate!
Last edited by xbitmetal at Jan 2, 2010,
#6
Critting as I listen:

A - Reminds me of the Chocobo Theme from FF games xD Very playful and fun. It makes me smile, honestly.

B - Very nice theme. This is where the playful aspect really comes. The layers are very nice... very good.

D - The only bad thing is the idiophone sounds kinda out of tune...but that's a GP problem xD I really liked the key change, works very good.

b ii - The altered theme was good. I like the kind of call and response beteween the music box and the piano.

E - This seems like it comes out of nowhere... Like... chaos in paradise? Dunno... xD I think a choir would fit AMAZINGLY over this. But very lightly... only to add color to it.

I think continuing the "chaotic" feel that E sets up would be the right thing to do. Maybe start adding a string section, and slowly build up to an "epic" section?

I just listened to it again, and I keep wanting to hear it modulating up by whole steps after it repeats... I'll include an attachment of what I mean (it's just a rough edit of what i mean, though).

After what I added, I could either see it climaxing at a point of great tension (like a lot of chaos just happened in the game and whatnot) or I could see it going back to the main them, just in a different key.

But very good :] 9.5 outta 10!

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1253711
Attachments:
14. Quaint, 7-8.gp5 (my edit).gp5
#7
I could tell straight away this was a great rpg soundtrack. It was instantly what I would have recognised as an rpg soundtrack if I hadn't read the title. Honestly, there isn't much improvement that needs to be done to it.

The only problem I have with the song, really, is the acoustic guitar. It was kind of out time and didn't really fit. However, that may be the discrepancy between non-RSE and RSE instruments (I've noticed that non-RSE instruments take slightly longer to play the notation)

Also, how did you get it in that cool view?

Overall I'd give it a 9/10. You're definately talented at writing this kind of thing, maybe you have a career in it?

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1253711
#8
excellent stuff man. I really liked the happy quirky kind of feel throughout. Great use of time signatures in the intro, switching between 7/8 and 6/8 and 4/4. Cool use of the lydian mode too. I really liked the theme at measure 9. Piano sounded great. The addition of all the layers fit wonderfully as you brought them in, I love stuff like that. There were multiple layers and melodies, but they didn't overpower the main theme at all, I especially liked the glockenspiel.

Key change to C was nice, and I actually kind of cracked a smile at the lame key sig joke just due to the pure lameness of it Return to the theme at measure 25 was perfect. I could really picture playing a game and being in a saloon in some calm village setting and then part E comes in - I picture some bad guys showing up in the saloon and they're giving your game character a rough time and you're gonna have to fight your way out now. I think after the polyphonic section, you should bring in a melody with more of a minor feel to it, just as sort a of a battle theme as the game character fights off the baddies. Nothing too epic, as they would just be some ordinary chump thugs, then after the battle it would go back to the saloon theme as the character leaves the thugs in a heap in the saloon, as you're character ventures out of the saloon into the main world. After that that I don't know where to take it though.

So far you've got the potential for a pretty awesome RPG theme here man, so keep working at it, I'd really like to hear this one finished! And if you could c4c, the one in the bottom of my sig's the newest one
#9
Cheers guys! Thanks a heap for the crit and recommendations, it really means a lot. =]

DiminishedFifth - Thanks a heap for the great detail, and for taking the time to re-write and upload an extension on the piece ( ). I'll definitely be taking the tension idea into practice, cheers!

leotus - Cheers for the compliment! I'm glad I was able to achieve the right sound I agree that the acoustic guitar doesn't necessarily line right up with the other instruments, but the idea was for it to serve as more of a counter-rhythm throughout, and to be a familiar factor when changing time signatures (with the more syncopated, non-linear feel working with both straight time signatures and odd ones).
The other factor is likely that the hi hats and acoustic melodies don't match! I wrote it as sort of a mini ''call-and-response'', and just ended up sticking. =]

I'm not sure what you mean by view, but I'm guessing the wider page setup (?). If so, you'd select the File menu, and then Page Setup. This one is set to 400 x 400, and I think the default is A4 (210 x 297). Hope this helps, and I'll get around to critting your piece as soon as possible.

zakatak9389 - Thanks man! For the welcoming crit and the wild, imaginative plot! I'm DEFINITELY going to experiment compulsively with that scenario in mind, together with DiminishedFifth's suggestion of a series of whole-tone (which always sounds retro 8-bit to me) modulation.
And you're right - I can see, myself, the saloon theme returning after more of a climax with call-and-response and different instruments happening, and then the more adventurous overworld theme sound. You're a legend!
And above all, I'm really happy that you could picture all these ideas from the music itself; I always really strive to be able to paint some sort of picture in the listener's head, so it means a lot that it's worked for somebody. =]

PS: I'm glad you liked my theory joke It was a long day with zero ha-has until that point

I'll get around to critting everyone's piece as soon as possible, and if I'm delayed, please feel free to PM me to remind me. Thanks again everybody!

Alex
Last edited by juckfush at Jan 4, 2010,