Page 1 of 2
#1
You refuse to take a piss just because you thinking holding it will keep your buzz...

Add on. Time for sober folks to make fun of us drunks and us drunks to make fun of ourselves.
#2
When you drink to numb your feelings.


████████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
█████████████████████████
██████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
#8
When you've been arrested for drunk driving numerous times.
Or...
When you've looked like this more than once.
#10
Alcoholics go to meetings. Drunks go to bars.
Drunk represent!
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#11
When it's your daughter's birthday and you've forgotten to buy her a present. So you drink some more and hope she'll find you drunk, and more and more of her love for you will wither away so she won't have to be dissapointed with you anymore. Just distant and cold, so she doesn't have to see you like the lowly, sad, deviant human being you are.
████████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
█████████████████████████
██████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
#12
when you burn your little friend while cooking?
Quote by deucedeucemr2
My knight in shining armor.

Quote by kstar22bassist
I like you sir. I would like to congratulate you on how awesome you are. You make me think that there is hope for humanity yet.

Quote by Venice King
Last edited by KrlzGmz at Dec 10, 2009,
#13
When you hurt your friend's feelings just so you can get another drink.
The content of this signature is pretty much irrelevant
#14
Quote by Kensai
When it's your daughter's birthday and you've forgotten to buy her a present. So you drink some more and hope she'll find you drunk, and more and more of her love for you will wither away so she won't have to be dissapointed with you anymore. Just distant and cold, so she doesn't have to see you like the lowly, sad, deviant human being you are.

Glad I never had daughters.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#15
Quote by Kensai
When you drink to numb your feelings.







yerp
Originally posted by J_Dizzle
THAAAANK YOU GoodCharloteSux is god
#16
when your guitar smells like vodka...
Equipment:
ESP LTD EC-1000
Agile 727 Interceptor Pro
Ibanez RG7321
Marshall 1960A Cab
Peavey 6505+
Rack stuff

Whoop Whoop. Holla.
#17
When you think having a drink is a great way to celebrate that exam you have tomorrow morning.

Quote by Jigsaw62
when your guitar smells like vodka...

Vodka doesn't leave a smell when it dries, you silly.
#18
when throwing up is natural to you
Quote by Kyose
You sir are my God.

That game had the best synthesis system ever.


Quote by firebird103
I'm pretty sure you just won the thread. I can confirm everything you just said as well being a heavily qualified geek myself....

Congrats sir
#19
Quote by Jackal58
Glad I never had daughters.


I think the non-existent daughter is luckier. You seem like you could be an overprotective father.

"Hi, is -daughter's name- in?"

"She's upstairs, barricaded into her bedroom, what do you want with her? "
#21
Quote by Minkaro
I think the non-existent daughter is luckier. You seem like you could be an overprotective father.

"Hi, is -daughter's name- in?"

"She's upstairs, barricaded into her bedroom, what do you want with her? "

They would never get that close.
Seriously I don't know that I would have been a good father to daughters. My boys think I'm a prick. They understand it but they'll both tell you I am a prick. A daughter? I'd be in jail for manslaughter.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#22
so you would accidentily kill her?
Quote by Kyose
You sir are my God.

That game had the best synthesis system ever.


Quote by firebird103
I'm pretty sure you just won the thread. I can confirm everything you just said as well being a heavily qualified geek myself....

Congrats sir
#23
Quote by PINK_F_L_O_Y_D
you`ve mastered the alphabet backwards.

Took me some time, but
#25
Quote by Jackal58
They would never get that close.
Seriously I don't know that I would have been a good father to daughters. My boys think I'm a prick. They understand it but they'll both tell you I am a prick. A daughter? I'd be in jail for manslaughter.


Maybe you should put less skunks in their rooms

Quote by herby190
You know you're an alcoholic when you're Kensai.


Sad but true
████████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
█████████████████████████
██████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
███████████████████████████
#26
You know your an alcoholic when you say drinking is not a problem, its part of your culture.
#27
Quote by Thepredster
so you would accidentily kill her?

No. Every Shrek like creature that came to rescue her.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#29
When you drink alone.
Chinese Democracy is a great album, people need to get over Slash.

Proud fan of Pop, Rap, Rock, and Metal.
#30
When you have to drunk proof your house to protect the things you own from yourself.

Also,when your breakfast consists of 4 Tylenol and whatever booze is left over from the night before.

WARNING!: THIS USER HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BE AN OPINIONATED ASS. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WHEN READING POSTS AND NEVER USE NEAR AN OPEN FLAME.USE ONLY AS DIRECTED.KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.







#31
Quote by Minkaro
I think he meant he'd kill anyone who got near her?

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? HOLDING HER HAND? YOU'D BETTER DAMN WELL KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE NOW."

Fixed for clarity.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#32
Quote by Jackal58
Glad I never had daughters.

, my Dad says that all the time.

He also says "I don't care what you do to her, but if her Ma shows up at the door screaming at me I'll murder you".


On topic:
You're an alcoholic when you fill these criteria

A maladaptive pattern of alcohol use, leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by three or more of the following seven criteria, occurring at any time in the same 12-month period:

1. Tolerance, as defined by either of the following:
* A need for markedly increased amounts of alcohol to achieve intoxication or desired effect.
* Markedly diminished effect with continued use of the same amount of alcohol.
2. Withdrawal, as defined by either of the following:
* The characteristic withdrawal syndrome for alcohol (refer to DSM-IV for further details).
* Alcohol is taken to relieve or avoid withdrawal symptoms.
3. Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended.
4. There is a persistent desire or there are unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.
5. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol or recover from its effects.
6. Important social, occupational, or recreational activities are given up or reduced because of alcohol use.
7. Alcohol use is continued despite knowledge of having a persistent or recurrent physical or psychological problem that is likely to have been caused or exacerbated by the alcohol (e.g., continued drinking despite recognition that an ulcer was made worse by alcohol consumption).
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#34
When you make art out of your discarded beverage containers.
When people start making commericals about you saying you are the most interesting man in the world.
#35
Quote by Ur all $h1t
, my Dad says that all the time.

He also says "I don't care what you do to her, but if her Ma shows up at the door screaming at me I'll murder you".


On topic:
You're an alcoholic when you fill these criteria

A maladaptive pattern of alcohol use, leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by three or more of the following seven criteria, occurring at any time in the same 12-month period:

1. Tolerance, as defined by either of the following:
* A need for markedly increased amounts of alcohol to achieve intoxication or desired effect.
* Markedly diminished effect with continued use of the same amount of alcohol.
2. Withdrawal, as defined by either of the following:
* The characteristic withdrawal syndrome for alcohol (refer to DSM-IV for further details).
* Alcohol is taken to relieve or avoid withdrawal symptoms.
3. Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended.
4. There is a persistent desire or there are unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.
5. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol or recover from its effects.
6. Important social, occupational, or recreational activities are given up or reduced because of alcohol use.
7. Alcohol use is continued despite knowledge of having a persistent or recurrent physical or psychological problem that is likely to have been caused or exacerbated by the alcohol (e.g., continued drinking despite recognition that an ulcer was made worse by alcohol consumption).

As I've said before - Your Dad is a wise man.
I plead guilty to number 3. What does that make me?
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#37
Quote by Jackal58
As I've said before - Your Dad is a wise man.
I plead guilty to number 3. What does that make me?

Nothing, most people fill one or two.

These are the criteria for alcohol abuse though, which are fun.

1. A maladaptive pattern of alcohol abuse leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by one or more of the following, occurring within a 12-month period:
* Recurrent alcohol use resulting in failure to fulfil major role obligations at work, school, or home (e.g., repeated absences or poor work performance related to substance use; substance-related absences, suspensions or expulsions from school; or neglect of children or household).
* Recurrent alcohol use in situations in which it is physically hazardous (e.g., driving an automobile or operating a machine).
* Recurrent alcohol-related legal problems (e.g., arrests for alcohol-related disorderly conduct).
* Continued alcohol use despite persistent or recurrent social or interpersonal problems caused or exacerbated by the effects of the alcohol (e.g., arguments with spouse about consequences of intoxication or physical fights).
2. These symptoms must never have met the criteria for alcohol dependence.
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
#38
you buy your daughter a pony and drive home from a christmas party and forget you put the pony in the garage.
Quote by larrytheguitar

I put the blanket over me and make my knees into a 'tent' so he couldn't see my boner. I jizzed while he gave me a lecture on using coasters.


BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME IS ALWAYS RELEVANT
#39
Quote by IbanezSA160a
you buy your daughter a pony and drive home from a christmas party and forget you put the pony in the garage.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ve4H5eaX4A
"Why should we subsidise intellectual curiosity?"
-Ronald Reagan

"Knowledge is in every country the surest basis of public happiness."
-George Washington
Page 1 of 2