#1
this is a serious thread. Please keep the stupid, pointless comments for any other thread. THis thread is for somebody who wants to get into some deep thinking. This is long, and may be confusing, but im sure if you trhink about it you can relate.

I have been thinking lately about my life how how it has changed so much. I just turned 18. About a year ago, i was the happiest kid around. All i did was play guitar, listen to music, and just enjoy life. I dreamed that one day i would be on stage playing with a band making music i love. I thought nothing could take that away. I was determined. I knew i would settle for nothing less than my dream. It all has changed within the last year or so. First of all, I got a girlfriend. My girlfriend lives about an hour away. I see her 3 times a week. Ihave an old truck that gets 12 mpg and i go to school and have a part time job. This alone takes up most of my time and most importantly my money. I hardly have anytime to play guitar anymore and I sure as hell dont have enough time or money to get a band together or buy new equitment. Lately my life has been 100% my girlfriend. All my time and money has gone from my dream of making it in the music business to my girlfriend, Let me just say i love my girlfriend more than anything. She is perfect.

Here is where I start thinking. My girlfriend basically AT THIS POINT IN MY LIfE, is preventing me from accomplishing my dream. I dont have time to start a band and practice, and i also dont have the money. I make about 75 bucks a week with my job. This is enough for gas and things like car payment, insurance etc.

I will never forget the way my life used to be. I used to just get my friends together, and we would jam all night long making music. I was in heaven. I felt(and still feel), that music is in my blood. When i listen to music and play music, i get the greatest natural high. I feel it and I love thinking about it and putting feelings into the music that i write. The past year i havnt had these feeling. I am too preoccupied.

Im a senior in HS, and as of now it looks like im going to end up going to college and getting a regular job like everybody else. I feel like I am just going to settle for the ordinary life when I know that packing my shit up and moving away to pursue music is my true dream. At the same time, i cant imagine my life without my Girlfriend. I love her and cant imagine living without her, but my music dream would definetly cross her out of my life. She plans on staying here in michigan to be a drama/theatre teacher. Its either staying with her and living an ordinary life, or breaking it off to pursue my dreams. Either way i lose something so close to my heart. I dont want to look back in 20 years and say "i settled for an ordinary life. I wonder what would have happened if i busted my ass in music. Would i be in a band making a living from playing my most favorite thing in the word?" But then again, i dont want to say that i lost my girlfriend who could quite of possibly been my soulmate.

Pretty much, my girlfriend distracts me from my dreams. All i do is hang out with her and have sex. I cant think about anything else. Then again, i dont want her out of my life. What the hell do I do. Put yourself in my position. Also, do you feel like you have been distracted from your dreams, or other important things in your life?
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#2
Quote by buzzcut
All i do is hang out with her and have sex.

Woe is you.
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#4
try making a band with your GF. Then you can be together a lot, and still do something with your life.


I only read the last paragraph
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#5
I'm waiting for the inevitable "cool blog, bro"

Anyway, why don't you just bring your guitar to her house, and in between sexing, she could help you write a song or something?
Last edited by Turkeyburger at Dec 12, 2009,
#6
No offense, but trying to make it big in the music industry is a silly goal. It won't happen.

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[quote="'[BurnTheDusk"]']Boss pedals may be built like tanks but I would rather buy a cardboard box that is on my side than pay for a tank that is working against me.
#9
tl;dr

just kidding. do college so you have a back up plan. making it in music has more to do with luck than talent or determination sometimes. also, get a better job.

eDti:
Quote by buzzcut
All i do is hang out with her and have sex.

you did this entire thread just to brag didn't you TS? not cool broski
Last edited by dhutton at Dec 12, 2009,
#10
That's why I don't date. I'm an engineering student and I know that a serious relationship would undoubtedly hold me back pursuing my career aggressively. I can have a relationship and still be an engineer. The relationship would restrict me if I were to get a massive promotion in another state or country.

Do you see yourself marrying this girl? If not, dump her and follow your dreams.
Last edited by hsteve3 at Dec 12, 2009,
#11
wall of text warning please...and you need to learn to balance your time and priorities is all. the pit can provide no help to you
#12
Quote by buzzcut
Lately my life has been 100% my girlfriend. All my time and money has gone from my dream of making it in the music business to my girlfriend


THIS is your problem. I know that she may be perfect, but you're just not managing things the right way! Besides, does she know your dreams? Do you share that with her? If yes, what's her opinion about it?

It doesn't need to be separate worlds, girlfriend vs dreams. Make one world with it all.
#13
All the time.

Signed, Stevie Wonder.

In all seriousness, i do quite often. I wish I knew what was happening and where I'm going in life but it isn't to be, unfortunately...

I guess all there is to do is just take life as it comes and see where you end up going. I feel your pain about the music, and I had one ex like that. She is now my ex for obvious reasons. I would pursue your dreams, instead of her. You get one chance at life, there are always more girls out there.
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#14
Quote by hsteve3
That's why I don't date. I'm an engineering student and I know that a serious relationship would undoubtedly hold me back pursuing my career agressively. I can have a relationship and still be an engineer. The would restrict if I were to get a massive promotion in another state or country.

Do you see yourself marrying this girl? If not, dump her and follow your dreams.

your saying you have a choice to have sex and a girlfriend?!
#15
Quote by Dr.Pain-MD
No offense, but trying to make it big in the music industry is a silly goal. It won't happen.

The music industry is shutting down? Missed that memo.

Can't help ya TS. It's your life to live not mine.
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#16
Quote by druggietoad2k5
All the time.

Signed, Stevie Wonder.

Best post yet.

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[quote="'[BurnTheDusk"]']Boss pedals may be built like tanks but I would rather buy a cardboard box that is on my side than pay for a tank that is working against me.
#17
I have so many different dreams I have no idea which one to focus on. I love literature and music, and being practically 17 (less than two weeks until I turn 17), I'm at that point where I need to decide what I'm going to pursue in higher education and career-wise. Problem is, I have no idea what to do. Should I pursue what I've wanted to do practically all my life (writing), or pursue something less risky? Trying to sort through all of that has made me lose sight of both.

That, and the Pit.
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#18
as a senior in high school, you really don't have sight of the big picture of life yet. all of your goals will change once you get thrown into the real world. take everything one day at a time, and make sure to never forget about the little things that make you happy.


p.s. maybe you should play guitar instead of posting on UG?
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#19
Quote by dhutton
tl;dr
just kidding. do college so you have a back up plan. making it in music has more to do with luck than talent or determination sometimes. also, get a better job.


+1

While I don't venture into the Pit too much and I felt like making a horrible fap joke, or saying to kill her and take her to a taxidermy so she can always be around I was in your position a few years back.

I graduated commuted from college to help my mom with things for another year and stay with my girlfriend. I hated not being able to have a band and all I did was hang out with the girl. What happened is we grew apart, or rather she wanted to be a with more than a few other guys... So anyway we went our separate ways and I am with a band now starting some local shows and we've got some pretty good ties that may help us go on tour when I graduate college next year. Now I'm single and spend all my time with music and am single but who cares, drunk chicks from bars are awesome j/k I can't even get/don't want the bar chicks.

Anyway, your not even twenty and there will be plenty of time for music in college and this chick, hate to say it, probably won't work out anyway regardless of what you do or don't do. So I say enjoy it while it lasts and rework your schedule some to enjoy guitar too, I had a full time job, was a full time student, had a gf, and still played at least 2 hours a day so it can be done.
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#20
Quote by hsteve3
That's why I don't date. I'm an engineering student and I know that a serious relationship would undoubtedly hold me back pursuing my career aggressively. I can have a relationship and still be an engineer. The relationship would restrict me if I were to get a massive promotion in another state or country.

Do you see yourself marrying this girl? If not, dump her and follow your dreams.



ooohhh....ok.

...
#21
Quote by buzzcut
All i do is hang out with her and have sex.


and you're complaining...why?

I don't see the big deal. Go to college locally so you can keep the gf, form a band there, play local gigs. if your band ever gets to the point where you might think about touring, well, cross that bridge when you come to it.

get a full time job in the summer so you can make more money.

as for the thread title: yes, i do. less in terms of my goals though and more in terms of who i am as a person. lately i've become selfish and living too much in the moment, not doing what is good in the long run... i used to be better than this. i don't really know what happened.
#22


Stop complaining and go have sex.


But seriously, tell her what your dreams are. Ask her what her opinion is. She just might be ok with it. Or better yet, teach her how to play guitar and form a band with her!!!!! That sounds like a better dream than yours IMO
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#24
I don't understand. Is your gf actively stopping you from pursuing music? Or do you think that you can't because you're with her? Or...? If she can't understand that you want to pursue a career in music or refused to let you...well, I dunno if your feelings are mutual. She should want you to be happy. And you don't have to spend all of your time and money on her.
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#25
I just feel like I'm slowing going insane, and not in the "insane yet incredibly intelligent" kind of way, the kind where you worry about literally everything at the same time, so that..what you're worried about in unexplainable, and vague...and then you wonder..then why the hell do I care? I shouldn't, but the anxiety remains.

Maybe I should find a girlfriend to have sex with
#26
Quote by Dr.Pain-MD
No offense, but trying to make it big in the music industry is a silly goal. It won't happen.

No offense, but people telling other people this piss me off.
"It won't happen."... So you can just see this guy's future and tell him basically to quit dreaming?
#27
Quote by Dr.Pain-MD
No offense, but trying to make it big in the music industry is a silly goal. It won't happen.


Not really. Theres about a .01% of making it big (unless your like me and being in an underground band with a decent sized fan base is good, but that's still really hard to do), but you can be really successful in other things, such as music producing, which is something I want to look into
#28
Quote by buzzcut
Let me just say i love my girlfriend more than anything. She is perfect.

Hmm according to your own words you shouldn't be complaining.
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#29
Quote by slipknot5678
Not really. Theres about a .01% of making it big (unless your like me and being in an underground band with a decent sized fan base is good, but that's still really hard to do), but you can be really successful in other things, such as music producing, which is something I want to look into

You don't have to be huge to be in the music industry, there are a lot more jobs involved in that than "Being the next big rock stars"
And like I said, he's basically saying "Quit dreaming, give it up" and that percentage you made is bullshit.
#30
Quote by SynVengeance
You don't have to be huge to be in the music industry, there are a lot more jobs involved in that than "Being the next big rock stars"
And like I said, he's basically saying "Quit dreaming, give it up" and that percentage you made is bullshit.


I'm sorry, you should flame me a lot more than you are, but the whole quit dreaming thing pisses me off too. And I completely understand that you don't need to be huge to be successful. that's what I meant. And the percentage I made is based on many factors, and I think if people try really hard could do this sort of thing. I want to be in a famous band, but I'm not going to try because I don't deserve to do what I want, and there are many other careers that sound interesting to me.
#31
All I've got going for me right now is my band and music. That's all. So no, I haven't lost sight.
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#32
Quote by slipknot5678
I'm sorry, you should flame me a lot more than you are, but the whole quit dreaming thing pisses me off too. And I completely understand that you don't need to be huge to be successful. that's what I meant. And the percentage I made is based on many factors, and I think if people try really hard could do this sort of thing. I want to be in a famous band, but I'm not going to try because I don't deserve to do what I want, and there are many other careers that sound interesting to me.
dude you are in my band. i let you in. you are very good guitarist. you fit perfect in rhythym. You dont need to feel so bad about yourself. youa re just fine
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#33
Quote by Diet_coke_head
You're a senior in high school, you don't know what life is yet.


This, just you wait man, if you don't have immediate plans for after high school than a lot of your time will feel like how you described.

Dreams, sometimes they take time, jack white was going to go to a priest school or something before he decided to become great, most of the members of radiohead went for four years in college before they became great (something like that, you get the jist) Don't lose hope you bastard.
#34
Quote by Karvid
I have so many different dreams I have no idea which one to focus on. I love literature and music, and being practically 17 (less than two weeks until I turn 17), I'm at that point where I need to decide what I'm going to pursue in higher education and career-wise. Problem is, I have no idea what to do. Should I pursue what I've wanted to do practically all my life (writing), or pursue something less risky? Trying to sort through all of that has made me lose sight of both.

That, and the Pit.

This is the road I'm at. Except I have no idea what I want to do.
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