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#1
I want to know what is the weirdest thing that your mum or girlfriend caught you doing
#2
My ex-gf once caught me getting head from another chick.

Not weird, but there was a lot of screaming and blue balls
Remember this. Remember the summer. Whatever you do. Don't forget.
#3
Nothing.
I'm a normal person.

I'm also a ninja.
ᶌῖᶌα ɭα ɌεᶌσɭƲʈιʘϰ
#4
I guess i'll do it...
FAP
Quote by imdeth
You're like internet Jesus!

This signature feels so empty now.
#6
My girlfriend oncewalked in on me fapping to my mums picture.
Even worse my grandmum and her girlfriend were in the next room and came in when they heard the comotion!
love is love // return to dust
#8
Quote by Sawman3
My ex-gf once caught me getting head from another chick.

Not weird, but there was a lot of screaming and blue balls


LMAO
#11
My sister caught me putting my nob in her Jam and swinging it around like a windmill.
Messy fun ending fast :<
On playing the Paul Gilbert signature at the guitar store extensively, my missus sighed:
"Put it down now, It's like you love that guitar more than me!"
In Which I replied.
"Well it has got two F-Holes!"
#12
Quote by ryanik19
Wtf You Did Your Mum


Jokes in this thread ------------------------


Your head ----------------------------
Quote by imdeth
You're like internet Jesus!

This signature feels so empty now.
#13
Quote by tancanada
My girlfriend oncewalked in on me fapping to my mums picture.
Even worse my grandmum and her girlfriend were in the next room and came in when they heard the comotion!



LMAO FAIL
#14
Quote by ryanik19
LMAO FAIL


Quote by imdeth
You're like internet Jesus!

This signature feels so empty now.
#15
Quote by Sawman3
My ex-gf once caught me getting head from another chick.

Not weird, but there was a lot of screaming and blue balls
If this is true, words cannot describe how disgusting that is.
Quote by soccermom
The only epic thing about the bass forum is Pete Wentz penis. Its Epic. Epic penis.
BASS, MT, AND PIT JUNKIE


#16
One time my girl and I were coming back from a nice evening out on the town and I had to sh*t really bad.I figured I could make it back to the house so I just gunned it home.So here I am,hunched over and running like I've been shot in the gut towards the door with her close behind me thinking there's something horribly wrong with me.Well,you know how when you really have to go it gets worse the closer you get to the bathroom,kinda like your stomach knows where you are and gets ready? I had that going on and was clenching...everything.I flung the door open,ran across the living room,open the bathroom door......and tripped on the door jam.All of my muscles unclenched and I sh*t my pants two feet from the f*cking toilet.My GF just stood there in a state of stunned silence and horror.........


That's honestly one of the most embarrassing moments I've ever had

WARNING!: THIS USER HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BE AN OPINIONATED ASS. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WHEN READING POSTS AND NEVER USE NEAR AN OPEN FLAME.USE ONLY AS DIRECTED.KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.







#17
Quote by tancanada
My girlfriend oncewalked in on me fapping to my mums picture.
Even worse my grandmum and her girlfriend were in the next room and came in when they heard the comotion!


dude, your grandma has a girlfriend
#18
one time my girlfriend came over and It was the first time we made out and one of her boobs was sticking out, later to find out my dad was watching me kiss my girlfriend and almost have sex with her....


Damn you door....WHY DONT YOU STAY CLOSED!
#19
Quote by Pr0gNut
One time my girl and I were coming back from a nice evening out on the town and I had to sh*t really bad.I figured I could make it back to the house so I just gunned it home....


HAHAHA, dude seriously, I laughed my head off.
#20
Quote by AboveTheBridge
If this is true, words cannot describe how disgusting that is.

Huh? Of course its true.
Remember this. Remember the summer. Whatever you do. Don't forget.
#21
Quote by forza21
HAHAHA, dude seriously, I laughed my head off.


It's such a great story,because victory was within my grasp,but instead of winning I shat my pants in front of the woman I love

WARNING!: THIS USER HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BE AN OPINIONATED ASS. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WHEN READING POSTS AND NEVER USE NEAR AN OPEN FLAME.USE ONLY AS DIRECTED.KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.







#23
Quote by AverageGoe
no serious answers yet... i hope...


Mine was completely serious.....



WARNING!: THIS USER HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BE AN OPINIONATED ASS. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WHEN READING POSTS AND NEVER USE NEAR AN OPEN FLAME.USE ONLY AS DIRECTED.KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.







#24
Quote by AverageGoe
no serious answers yet... i hope...


Mine was. Really. She was heping me pull it out because it got stuck.


Big banana.
#25
Nothing embarrassing

I think my girlfriend caught me staring at her breasts once...She called me a disgusting pervert. Oh and we were having sex at the time.
Blog Of Awesome UGers.
Quote by OddOneOut
I seem to attract girls.
Which is annoying, cos I'm a girl and I like cock.

Quote by IRISH_PUNK13
Being an idiot should be illegal too.
#26
My girlfriend once caught me catching her catching me. Funny days!
Oh, you wouldn't want an angel watching over
Surprise, surprise, they wouldn't wanna watch
#27
Quote by xxGUITARZER0xx
one time my girlfriend came over and It was the first time we made out and one of her boobs was sticking out, later to find out my dad was watching me kiss my girlfriend and almost have sex with her....


Damn you door....WHY DONT YOU STAY CLOSED!



your dad was watching?
#28
Quote by Venice King
Nothing embarrassing

I think my girlfriend caught me staring at her breasts once...She called me a disgusting pervert. Oh and we were having sex at the time.

Are you a quaker?
#29
Quote by ryanik19
LMAO FAIL

Internets is not always srs business.
"Black gives way to more black."




I have UG Black Style and I can barely read my signature.

Also, I like black.


~DawnwalkerALL HAIL COMRADE DAWNWALKER
#30
Quote by xxGUITARZER0xx
one time my girlfriend came over and It was the first time we made out and one of her boobs was sticking out, later to find out my dad was watching me kiss my girlfriend and almost have sex with her....


Damn you door....WHY DONT YOU STAY CLOSED!


And you're annoyed at the door ...
#31
My sister once walked in on me jacking it. I covered it with my house coat, but she would not go away so I could then pull up my boxers. She just stood there, in awkward silence, for like 30 seconds.
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#32
Quote by Go Square Go!
Are you a quaker?

What is a quaker?
Blog Of Awesome UGers.
Quote by OddOneOut
I seem to attract girls.
Which is annoying, cos I'm a girl and I like cock.

Quote by IRISH_PUNK13
Being an idiot should be illegal too.
#33
Quote by Venice King
What is a quaker?

I guess that's understandable, I think there are about 5 here in Scotland.

They're a bunch of religious nutters, in short. Or as we say, "Bible Bashers". They're kinda Mormons-from-South-Park-y.
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#34
Quote by TheBurningFish
I guess that's understandable, I think there are about 5 here in Scotland.

They're a bunch of religious nutters, in short. Or as we say, "Bible Bashers". They're kinda Mormons-from-South-Park-y.

That doesn't really make alot of sense in this context though
Blog Of Awesome UGers.
Quote by OddOneOut
I seem to attract girls.
Which is annoying, cos I'm a girl and I like cock.

Quote by IRISH_PUNK13
Being an idiot should be illegal too.
#35
NRANNHLEILR
OETYSI LRNYS
TATOENYSGM
HLENEGMNRA
IL RENRAOET
NYSCOETTAT
GMAATATHLE

To me. Try, you know you want to^


Puberty
Quote by Will Swanson
I was surprised the first time I came. It shot two feet into the air. I couldn't stop laughing.
#36
Quote by Venice King
What is a quaker?




That ^

WARNING!: THIS USER HAS BEEN KNOWN TO BE AN OPINIONATED ASS. ALWAYS USE CAUTION WHEN READING POSTS AND NEVER USE NEAR AN OPEN FLAME.USE ONLY AS DIRECTED.KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN.







#37
Quote by Venice King
That doesn't really make alot of sense in this context though

He's saying that if you were called disgusting for looking at a chicks boobs during sex, then you're probably from a clan of chaps who find ankles sexy.
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#39
Quote by Pr0gNut
One time my girl and I were coming back from a nice evening out on the town and I had to sh*t really bad.I figured I could make it back to the house so I just gunned it home.So here I am,hunched over and running like I've been shot in the gut towards the door with her close behind me thinking there's something horribly wrong with me.Well,you know how when you really have to go it gets worse the closer you get to the bathroom,kinda like your stomach knows where you are and gets ready? I had that going on and was clenching...everything.I flung the door open,ran across the living room,open the bathroom door......and tripped on the door jam.All of my muscles unclenched and I sh*t my pants two feet from the f*cking toilet.My GF just stood there in a state of stunned silence and horror.........


That's honestly one of the most embarrassing moments I've ever had
#40
Quote by TheBurningFish
He's saying that if you were called disgusting for looking at a chicks boobs during sex, then you're probably from a clan of chaps who find ankles sexy.

Oooh. I really shouldn't think so much about unfunny jokes.
Blog Of Awesome UGers.
Quote by OddOneOut
I seem to attract girls.
Which is annoying, cos I'm a girl and I like cock.

Quote by IRISH_PUNK13
Being an idiot should be illegal too.
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