#1
Alrighty, here's a song i put together recently. I think it's pretty good but since I usually don't make solos the solo in this one is a peice of junk. Any tips on anything would be greatly appreciated

as always, C4C. Tell me which song to crit!
Attachments:
Rip, Tear, Bleed.gp4
Last edited by Ze_Metal at Dec 15, 2009,
#5
I can tell you this right off the bat. This song is a solid 9/10.

The ONLY downfall to this song was the intro. It seriously needs to go and if it does. Consider this song a good 9.5/10. A Thrash epic in my books.

- Bar 17 - 32 is probably the best riff in the whole song.

- Bar 89's solo was just perfect for this song. Very pentatonic and just the right feel needed for this song.
#6
Wow thanks man! That means a lot. I agree the intro is iffy, I'll have to change it. But I'm glad you enjoyed it!
#8
Thanks man! I'm recording it soon so it will be sweet.

By the way, which songs should I crit for you two?
#9
Really nice work, man!

The only thing I would suggest is harmonising the riff starting from bar 25 (earlier on when the drum starts).
Last edited by chaoticfables at Dec 16, 2009,
#10
Damn, this is really cool!

The riff at measure 17 is KILLER! Really doesn't need to be touched. The harmonized parts for it worked like a charm!

Measure 49 is a damn solid riff too, a good amount of dissonance while keeping everything flowing.

The solo works very well within the context of the song.

I actually like the intro, but I would suggest finding ways to improve it.

Finally I don't know whether or not I like the sudden ending, it works, but I definately like the ideas in the song enough to want to hear it again.

This is definately a solid 8/10 for me, nice job man!

And if you'd be so kind, I'd appreciate a critique of this composition...
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1238643
#12
i agree with everyone else. the intro needs some work. that little part at 8 and 9 are brilliant though. it reminds me of in flames' the jester race.


Now on to your slaughterhouse of mosh riffs. they're all awesome.

At 65, i would have had some eort of doublebass/Bass rhythm going on, but it works this way.


The solo was good, but i think it kind of diddn't fit the song. it seemed a bit...cheery...
I want something that'll make me wanna punch babies.

Last is the end... If you can call that an end, the song just stops.
At least put one last chord there or something! lol. ... Unless you're got a progressive album thing going where another song picks up from there.
Then it would work.

9/10. Great mosh anthem.


Mind critting mine? Either The Theft or Party Bus in my sig
AYE! if you LOVE

FOXY SHAZAM!
#14
Quote by QAZAR
this is awesome! its not really tied to thrash. its just pure metal. i love it man keep it heavy

could u listen to my little diddy?



Really awesome song man, really heavy and has good drum beats! Solo has good use of sweeps also. Only thing is that some parts get a little repeatitive


It's alright, I don't really mind much. I'd prefer a thread though. =]
Last edited by Ze_Metal at Dec 17, 2009,
#15
Quote by The Arsis
Dude, take your shit out of his thread. Plus, you should be smack for even implying him C4C your piece.

****! sorry! didnt know it would offend so much! if i can find a way to remove i will
#16
Wow this is great. I'm listening to it right now. I think the intro is great contrary to everyone else :S, it's like...calm and then Bam! Heavyness. are you thinking of adding Bass?

I think the solo suits the song very well, thumbs up

I like the harmonizing throughout the song. I think it ended a bit sudden though, but in studio I guess add some reverb at the end at it should sound great. 9/10 for this great song, although there's one part of the intro I don't like, but it's for a stupid reason so I won't mention it.

here's mine if you don't mind :
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1247984
#17
Quote by Kämpfer
Wow this is great. I'm listening to it right now. I think the intro is great contrary to everyone else :S, it's like...calm and then Bam! Heavyness. are you thinking of adding Bass?

I think the solo suits the song very well, thumbs up

I like the harmonizing throughout the song. I think it ended a bit sudden though, but in studio I guess add some reverb at the end at it should sound great. 9/10 for this great song, although there's one part of the intro I don't like, but it's for a stupid reason so I won't mention it.

here's mine if you don't mind :
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1247984


Yeah, actually for those who are commenting on the ending I probably should have mentioned that I didn't put it in on the tab =]

And please tell me, not stupid if it helps me improve the song.
#18
Hey man,
this song rocks the shit out of me! I never use to respond to any song,
but this one totally fits my style! I enjoy playing it so much man, thanks a lot for
sharing this masterpiece of work! Unlike "The Arsis", I love the intro.
I'd give 10/10 points!
#19
Quote by Stodgy
Hey man,
this song rocks the shit out of me! I never use to respond to any song,
but this one totally fits my style! I enjoy playing it so much man, thanks a lot for
sharing this masterpiece of work! Unlike "The Arsis", I love the intro.
I'd give 10/10 points!


Thanks! It means a lot!

I'm recording it this week with all the works, so if your interested I can keep you updated!
#20
Of course man! If ur not writin this into the thread, u can pm me the links!! I'd love to hear the records!
#21
I would love to hear this recorded as well, can you message me as well I thought the intro was fantastic, despite everyone else, it just all went together, it had a very haunting sound to it, setting a brilliant vibe for the rest of the song If you have time, check out my Be a part of the hour song on Guitar Pro thread, im making the longest collabaration ever, I think Aiming for a conceptual 1 hour song written on guitar pro, and if your making songs like this, I'd very much like you to give it a go
#22
very nice! the song went somewhere, changed tones, and basically made me really want to headbang. especially with the riff at 33 that comes back later in the song. major props.
#23
This sounds like a great pit song, especially when 49 hits its on!
Dont flip about the solo dude, it worked perfectly
every riff is amazing
The only thing id change are a couple notes in rhythms:
The ending phrase to one of the riffs goes like 2100 2100, consider changing it to triplets
210 210
.....................................................9
also the main riff that goes 7 7 7*6*
.......................................00 00 00
consider changing that little 6 to a 9, i tried it out it flows a little better i think, an 8 will also work to if you want a more minor sound but the 9 flows a little better

Crit back?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=22664554#post22664554
Last edited by megagage at Dec 20, 2009,
#24
Even from the first few bars I can tell this is gonna be pretty awesome, but there are some parts which I'm not sure about, and in the end this is only gonna be me nit picking:

  • Bar 16 - The acoustic guitar seems to end to abruptly, consider having it do more than one power chord in that bar
  • Bars 17 - 32 - Awesome, I love it
  • At times I can't quite tell what is meant to be what within the structure of the song, not really a problem because I'm enjoying what I hear; it seems to be a mix of Melodic Death Metal with elements of Lamb of God thrown in
  • Bars 73-79 - I'm honestly not sure if such a thrashy riff works within this song, there's nothing wrong with it, but it doesn't quite seem to flow within the piece
  • Bars 111-114 - The only part in this whole piece that I didn't like, maybe it's just the Midi but it sounds really messy
  • Outro- Well what can I say you don't really have one, I would add one as after the awesomeness of the rest of the song, it seems a bit anti-climactic


Over all I'd give it a High 8 if not a 9 outa 10, it's really rather awesome. Just a few tweaks with transitions and cleaning up some sections and you'll have an easy high 9/10
All I want is for everyone to go to hell...
...It's the last place I was seen before I lost myself



Quote by DisarmGoliath
You can be the deputy llamma of the recordings forum!
#25
This is a really thrashy song, which you've managed to pull off without sounding like every other guy with a BC Rich who sits and just plays open strings as low tuned as he can go.

Intro is a bit iffy, but the transition into the main song saves it.

The riff from bars 17-32 is really really good, I can hear an A7x influence on that, which is not bad thing.

33-40 would be very good pitting material, I like the locking in of the bass and guitar to give it a beefier sound

49-56 is very urgent, I like it.

The solo is also very good, well thought out, another A7x influenced piece, which really fits.

The only problem I would have is the slightly abrupt ending
#27
Thanks for the crit on my song man.

I'm not too sure if I like the intro. I think it could be a bit more gradual, like, have the acoustic strumming fade in for 4 bars then have the electric play after.
Kinda sounds like Darkest Hour's 'No God', if you've ever heard it, when the first riff kicks in, which isn't a bad thing I think there should be a bit more variation on this riff though, just like change the ending of it on the 2nd and 4th repeat. I like the harmony on the last repeat of it btw.
All the sections flow really nicely together. The solo fits in very nicely but I think it should end needs to be a bit more obvious. Like, more of a buildup to it.

I really like it though, sounds like something Darkest Hour would do. But that's really my problem with it. It just sounds like it's been done before. Good job though
#28
Opening is really sweet, it sounds like a fusion of symphony x and dimmu borgir. The entirety of the song actually sounds a bit like dimmu to me, except with faster guitar riffage. I like the 'main riff', as well as the main chord progression, sounds pretty evil. When the main riff comes back with the power drumming it works really well too.

Guitar solo is nothing special lol. Abrupt ending, which isn't necessarily a bad thing though.


.....so the songs over? I was kinda thrown off because it sounds to me like just that 1 main riff. Add a bit more depth to the song thorugh more riffs/progressions or whatever. 5/10 because it just sounded like 1 riff with drum+bass tracks and a solo

c4c? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1243743
Kurzweil K2500xs
#29
Starting off, the open chords sounded kind of weird to me, but then as the riff sinks in you realise for the mood of music the dissonance fits in to the bigger scheme of things so it works out nicely.

Nice first riff, sounds damn epic but your harmony with the underlying chords can clash - watch out for that.

Riff at 33 is ****ing headbang moment, and yeah, your drums are simple yet extremely effective, perfect feeling throughout.

Nice little interlude before coming in with the classic, metallica style riff at 73.

I felt your solo, rhythmic wise it worked rather well, but honestly the solo felt uninspired - I hail from a school of thought where, if a song doesn't need a solo, don't put it- Here, I think you should polish your solo to make it reflect that aggression, that blasting relentless feeling, or just not put a solo, but right now, it hinders the song instead of adding to it.

Seems yo udon'T have an ending yet, it you wanna finish it off there, I suggest punches with some chords after your epic sounding riff, something majestic and powerful. Could be cool!

Nice riffing man, just work on the solo and beggining harmonies it'll be mint stuff. Nothing overly original, but solid stuff!