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#1
We all watch porn. If you don't, you're either lying, sexually inactive, and/or most likely crap in bed. Or a frigid woman.

But what's the funniest thing you've ever seen in a porno?

I recently saw one where the woman - quite naturally - said in response to, "do you like it?", with, "I love it more than I love my mother".

I laughed myself into tears.

(Did a search, nothing came up. As for the nature of the thread; I'm bored, and typing is keeping my hands warm enough to jack off)
Matter is void. All is vanity. All is nothing. Nothing exists.

But damn does whisky rule
#2
Jamaican me Horny
Fuck rights, I believe in something... even a guy like Merlin you know?
#3
8 midgets. One woman.


Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#4
Quote by Talonwolf
As for the nature of the thread; I'm bored, and typing is keeping my hands warm enough to jack off
Charming.
#5
"I learned to do this from my mommy"

Whenever a dude cums in a chicks hair and she flips out.

When the chick pretends the dudes dick is big.

When a chick give the most unenthusiastic "Yeah!' or "Oh"
#6
I've seen some pretty comical surgeons impressions of tits. Can't beat off to those because my palm refuses to get of my face, and although I am ambi-wankerous I need the other hand for pressing the back button on my browser.
#7
"OMG I'm gonna shit!"
Originally Posted by neopowell
I'm perfectly capable of rating my own poo, I don't need a website to help me. I've devised strict criteria based on texture, smell, ease of passing and numerous other factors. It's even colour-coded.


ಠ_ಠ
#8
Quote by Talonwolf
We all watch porn. If you don't, you're either lying, sexually inactive, and/or most likely crap in bed. Or a frigid woman.

But what's the funniest thing you've ever seen in a porno?

I recently saw one where the woman - quite naturally - said in response to, "do you like it?", with, "I love it more than I love my mother".

I laughed myself into tears.

(Did a search, nothing came up. As for the nature of the thread; I'm bored, and typing is keeping my hands warm enough to jack off)


What the ****
Bong Rips
& Bong Rips
& Bong Rips
& Bong Rips
#9
Whenever anyone talks, ever.
My band, Escher
My progressive rock project, Mosaic

Quote by Lappo
clearly, the goal is to convert every thread into a discussion about BTBAM

BTBAM IS ALWAYS RELEVANT
#10
Girl had a huge Spongebob band-aid on her thigh, I thought it was a joke but nope...it remained. Killed it for me.
#11
Not very many lul worth moments, but a lot of WTF moments.


I was watching this one, and the near the end the girl started saying "Don't cum in me!" over and over again.


Guess what happend? Yea.
The she freaked out saying she wasn't on the pill and what conclusion does she come to?

She begins raking the semen out of her cooch with her finger nails. I wanted to turn it off so bad, but was paralyzed in disbelief.
#12
I spend a lot of time watching porn with classical music playing. I remember when a girl climaxed at the crescendo of Holst's Jupiter, now that was pretty damn awesome.

Quote by hazzmatazz
youmakemesmile...

Quote by sebastian_96
Today I stole a girls tampons for being such an annoying bitch.





MUFC


My love for you
Is like a truck
Berserker.
#13
i recently saw one where this dude's "mom" was being banged by a stranger and the dude is like "DAD! WHO THE F**K IS THAT?!" and pretty much there is this sex scene as this dude is cringing next to the scene like "MOM?!?! STOP?!?!"
Totally ruined it.....
WHO'S GONNA BUY ME A VALVEKING?!?!?!
#15
Clown porn is funny...
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#16
That part where the middle aged woman screams, " Please don't kill me" at the guy in the black bunny suit.

I laughed for 7 hours straight.
Quote by thanksgiving
I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#19
Quote by Oroborous
Whenever I hear a queef

Totally kills my mojo



It is worse in person, so hard to not lose a beat when that happens.

The first time it happend to me, I literally almost started laughing right then.
#20
I was watching a trailer for this British porn star, seeing if it was worth checking out her stuff. It was all looking good until this thick, rough cockney voice goes 'CORRR...GORGEOUS TITS!!' and a pair of middle-aged hands appeared to touch her.

I do not want cockney man-voices in my porn. Not now, not ever.
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#21
Quote by whitenihilist
It is worse in person, so hard to not lose a beat when that happens.

The first time it happend to me, I literally almost started laughing right then.

Oh man....the memories...

*queef*

EDIT: OH WAIT! I remember a funny porno moment! One chick was eating out another and she was queefing like crazy in her mouth! And every time the chick went back in to continue her work the other chick would send another queef down south straight into her face!
Last edited by Oroborous at Dec 16, 2009,
#23
Quote by Oroborous

EDIT: OH WAIT! I remember a funny porno moment! One chick was eating out another and she was queefing like crazy in her mouth! And every time the chick went back in to continue her work the other chick would send another queef down south straight into her face!









#24
That's just gross.
My band, Escher
My progressive rock project, Mosaic

Quote by Lappo
clearly, the goal is to convert every thread into a discussion about BTBAM

BTBAM IS ALWAYS RELEVANT
#25
"Ride my ****! RIDE IT! Oh! Look at that winkin' stinkin' pink brownie maker."
"Yeah, you f-ng like that?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna slap it!"
*SLAP*
"Oh!"
"Gonna do it again!"
*SLAP*
"I'm fixin' to do it again!"
*SLAP*
#26
^

I watched this one where a guy picked a girl up on a flight, took her to the "party" and bangs her right in front of the party. The worst part was that they were all speaking in Australian accents and talking about things that had nothing to do with what the hell was going on.

*While taking clothes off*
"So what do you Major in?"
*stuff*
"Well I'm a producer"

I nearly killed myself when she was asked to say "Shag Me", because everybody else thought it was so damn funny.
No means maybe
Last edited by pilgrimevan at Dec 16, 2009,
#27
Quote by whitenihilist
Not very many lul worth moments, but a lot of WTF moments.


I was watching this one, and the near the end the girl started saying "Don't cum in me!" over and over again.


Guess what happend? Yea.
The she freaked out saying she wasn't on the pill and what conclusion does she come to?

She begins raking the semen out of her cooch with her finger nails. I wanted to turn it off so bad, but was paralyzed in disbelief.


Oh my god... I dunno whether to laugh or throw up
Matter is void. All is vanity. All is nothing. Nothing exists.

But damn does whisky rule
#29
Saw one clip of a couple of American guys banging some weegie ned chick. Dialogue goes something like

yank: where's my dick, baby?

ned: up mah f*ckin' arse

yank: yea, in your ass


ned: cum in mah mooth

yank: *furiously jerking off*

ned: hurry up

yank: *jizzes*

ned: thanks fur the spunk
#30
I like the one when the Scandinavian dude cums all over his friends face while dping some chick. He cums inside of his gang bang buddies mouth.
Most of the important things


in the world have been accomplished


by people who have kept on


trying when there seemed to be no hope at all
#31
Quote by hunterman
"Ride my ****! RIDE IT! Oh! Look at that winkin' stinkin' pink brownie maker."
"Yeah, you f-ng like that?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna slap it!"
*SLAP*
"Oh!"
"Gonna do it again!"
*SLAP*
"I'm fixin' to do it again!"
*SLAP*

I always feel like if I was one of the "actors" and someone said anything like this I'd just stop whatever I was doing and stare at them and make it a REALLY awkward moment.

Not that I would ever be in porn, but I just don't see how that doesn't happen more often. If at all.
My band, Escher
My progressive rock project, Mosaic

Quote by Lappo
clearly, the goal is to convert every thread into a discussion about BTBAM

BTBAM IS ALWAYS RELEVANT
#32
Quote by ChucklesMginty
When they go for a shot and it sort of just dribbles out.



I never thought about it, but that is pretty funny.


Quote by Talonwolf
Oh my god... I dunno whether to laugh or throw up



The funniest part was after it was all over, they were so relieved and proud of themselves they came up with that brilliant plan.


Quote by Nelsean
I like the one when the Scandinavian dude cums all over his friends face while dping some chick. He cums inside of his gang bang buddies mouth.









#33
Any violent porn vid where it starts out with the girl being raped, then she gets into it halfway through.
#34
Quote by whitenihilist
Not very many lul worth moments, but a lot of WTF moments.


I was watching this one, and the near the end the girl started saying "Don't cum in me!" over and over again.


Guess what happend? Yea.
The she freaked out saying she wasn't on the pill and what conclusion does she come to?

She begins raking the semen out of her cooch with her finger nails. I wanted to turn it off so bad, but was paralyzed in disbelief.



Hey!!!! I watched that one!
#36
I saw a crazy one a few months back, off a guy in a padded cell, straight jacket on and tied down and this woman is just ****ing going for it on him and I mean GOING FOR IT!

She was ****ing insane, the screams and sounds coming out of her were crazy. It was hot but I couldn't but help watch it again and lol at some of it
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#38
Hearing queefs or pussy farts or whatever they're called.
I always have to pause the porn and laugh my ass of for several minutes straight.
#39
Quote by metalmouth22
"OMG I'm gonna shit!"


Quote by CFH82
Ejaculate in MY moustache?!

Music is just wiggly air. Accept it or leave it.ಠ_ಠ
#40
Quote by metalmouth22
"OMG I'm gonna shit!"


Source??
ಠ_ಠ
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽