#1
Something far different than what people expect from me. Think Suffocation/Vader/Cryptopsy

If you don't have powertab, just download it, don't whine to me about how it doesn't work in guitar pro and therefore you can't crit this. Its far more inconvenient for me to tab in guitar pro when I won't do the other instruments than it is for you to spend the possible 2 minutes maybe downloading and installing powertab. If someone maybe wants to collab with me on material THAN I will use guitar pro, and than will I bar line my tabs so they work in it.

P.S: From here on out unsatisfactory returned crits or in general such as "Cool song bro" will be reported, ALWAYS, this will apply to all of my songs from here on out. I expect criticism, not 2 words from you people.

Edit: Uploaded a cleaned up version, some timing discrepancies were present.
Attachments:
Priest Pyre.zip
Last edited by Themadisraeli at Dec 30, 2009,
#2
Normally I would do a section-by-section crit... But, the whole thing was good, so I'm just gonna mention one or two things that I thought of as I listened.

One thing is that lines 2 and 3 seem like secondary intros rather than separate riffs. They're good.. But I feel like they sort of hold the song back in the start.

Another thing is that at the end of the solo, you drop the thirds out of the chords and make them octaves.... I think that's a pretty cool sound and maybe you could've held onto it a little longer rather than going back into just the really "diminished third" sound. But that's just opinion, nothing wrong at all with what you have.
#3
Intro, as well as the next riff (not as much though) sounds like Napalm Death. I agree that the two intros thingy sounds a bit weird, but it'll probably sound better when recorded. I'm not a big fan of the chromatic riff in the second intro, but it's grown on me a bit, so it's fine. The next riff has a really thrashy vibe to it. It might be a bit generic, but it's still nice. The chords which come next really catch you by surprise, cool. The next riff sound really grindcore-ish. The intro to the breakdown is cool, I think you should repeat it a bit more. When the long chords ring just before the breakdown, you might wanna harmonize it using the second guitar, using the same notes except four frets up, I think it would fit. The breakdown reminds me of Suffocation. The solo was pretty unexpected and the rhythm during it sounds really unsettling. I love how the solo changes so abruptly, really throws you off in a good way. The outro sounds like deathgrind, kinda something like Exhumed would do.

Overall, great work, I have nothing bad to say about it really. I think you should record this for real though.
Last edited by Pingis_Or_Death at Dec 30, 2009,
#4
My thoughts listening to the song:

-Like the first riff. Tension filled. One issue, it drags too long without variation. Try some lead work or some octave harmonies in fifths with the chords.

-Next riff is alright. It works, it doesn't sound bad, but it doesn't grab me either. Feels very much like a filler riff. It boils down to having no discernable hook and following a very straight, quantized pattern. Some syncopation or stop-start might really help this riff out.

-Next riff is solid. However, the tempo change feels a little forced. The obvious solution here is the drums, when added will help. But, even with percussion, the change still occurs abruptly with no announcement or transition. I would work out the kinks there. As for the riff itself, I like the use of 5 bar phrasing instead of four. What might be really cool is if you used a bar of 9/8 at the end to add a polyrhythm. I think the riff begs for it. With, drums, it could sound sick.

-The next tempo change is far more effectively constructed. However, it feels to soon after the first change. I think a second riff should be added between the two changes.

-The riff itself is very thrashy. Suffocation and Vader aren;t coming to mind as much as Kreator and Slayer.

-The next riff i do like quite a bit. It feels frantic and driving, and suits the flow well. There's power in its implicity.

-Obviously, the trem picking is a suitable continuation of the riff preceding it.

-I'm not so sure about the C#m7b9 at bar 14. Its incredibly dissonant, and I feel as though something a little more nice sounding would suit the part better, especially as some extreme dissonance is about to follow. I do, however, like the alternating phrasing of the riff between chords and chugging. Like the idea, have issues with the implementation.

-Now the tempo change back to the intro riff is very shaky, and feels a bit unnecessary, as the tempo changes again immediately into the riff afterwards. I would just axe the reintro, but its your call. Think about reworking the transition.

-Now I like the beginnings of a riff at bar 23. I wish that idea had been developped into its own riff instead of thrown out after the transition. It had promise.

-I like the chunky riff, and especially like the 3/4 pulse. The meter feels better that way.

-Bar 27. I don't like it. At all. I've never had one of these moments in your songs, but i think this section needs extreme revision. Extreme to the point of being completely different. It's far too dissonant on its own, and the solo over it makes this just borderline nonsense. Even the Mars Volta at their strangest doesn't go this far.

-Ending, however, is solid. Nice and punchy.

Overall, this is a good song. I question the Suffocation comparison, as this feels closer to a death-influenced Kreator song than Brutal Death Metal. Regardless, however, it is solid, with some spot on riffs. The only things to watch are a few rough tempo changes and that very iffy solo section.