#1
Haha took like 15 minutes and its being worked on so yeah....criticism appreciated

Yes its happened again
And its not went so well
Tripped up over my words
and ive stumbled and fell

Typed up conversations
its been going pretty good
but now theres no hesitation
but still youve got no clue

(chorusy bit here, slower)

And we sit
and we laugh
with each other
staring me in the face
but i dont know
if i can fill that space
just yet
i dont know oh oh oh oh

you say that you know me
and you say oh so well
and if all of that is true
well how cant you tell?

and nothing is forced
but it just seems to flow
and its all i think about
while this buzz here it grows

*chorus again*

and im oh so dedicated
to our idle chit chat
we there for hours and hours
while time loses track of us

and its never been stressful
as we talk on and on
its never a bore now
just wish we had longer now
just wish we had longer oh oh....

appreciate comments, thanks for reading
#2
Not bad, pretty cool actually! The way it's written however, makes me think that the main character is going to break up with his girlfriend because she is holding him back, and is not worth his time, but at the same time still likes her and would date her if he had more time.

Am I right?

Also, 8/10
My Albums

TALKING LIKE A JERK EXCEPT
YOU ARE AN ACTUAL JERK
AND LIVING PROOF THAT

SOMETIMES FRIENDS ARE MEAN


last.fm
tumblr
#3
yes its good, like romantic but happy and active, well i guess it depends in the way u play it haha
keep it like that
#4
thanks for the feedback folks, to jackwhite, its actually the opposite, bout her not knowing that he likes her and thanks joker, its a pretty upbeat strumming song thanks for taking the time to read
#5
Looks cool! I really like the chorus. Quick question tho, is it just verses and chorus or is the end a bridge section?
#6
aw thanks man, yeah its just verse chorus atm, maybe going to repeat i dont know a bit for the bridge, unsure now though, thoughts?
#7
I really like it. : ) It seems sweet, and I can understand what the main character is thinking.
#9
Hey, I really liked it. It uses simple words but it still has a good message. Really reminds me of the Libertines :P. But not lyric-wise, but rather.. I can imagine it could be a libertines-like song! But it's good!

I'd love if you rated mine xD. It's called Cuba.

mfG
so you went to school to relearn how to smile?