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#1
Ok you would know this was coming if you look into the Priest thread. Anyway, I searched and found threads on metal lyrics and some "best lyrics" ones. So, I thought this might be a change..

So, who thinks he's Machine Man?

So you mother****ers want to race
You've all got loser tattooed on your face


And another from Priest's Ripper days,

Once he's summoned and installed
Cyberface
He'll infest your motherboard
Cyberface

Don't access the site
Or beware his megabyte


Found this in some archived thread..

Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black ****ing Metal ist Krieg!

Black...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black ****ing Metal ist Krieg!
Black Metal ist Krieg!

Black...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Ihr Wichser, es ist Krieg!
Black Metal!

Black...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black...

Black...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
****, Metal ist Krieg!
Black Metal!

Black...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black ****ing Metal ist Krieg!
Black Metal ist Krieg!

Krieg...
Ihr Wichser, es ist Krieg!
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Ihr Wichser...
Krieg...

Krieg...
Black Metal ist Krieg!
Black ****ing Metal ist Krieg!

Krieg...
**** you!
Krieg, es ist Krieg!

Black Metal ist Krieg!

Krieg...
Ihr Wichser, Krieg!
Es ist Krieg!

Black Metal ist Krieg ...




ok, care to contribute?
Wann kann ich dich von diesem Ort wegbringen?
Wann ist der Tod unser einziger Zuschauer?
Wann können wir schreien anstatt zu flüstern?
Wann ist der neue Anfang das Ende dieses traurigen Madrigals?
#2
Like David Gilmour?


Gear:
Ibanez RG4EXFM1
Vox VT15
Alvarez Acoustic
Dunlop Jazz III Picks
Quote by alaskan_ninja
Take your pants off and swing your wiener around in circles.
#3
I'm pretty sure people know what Black Metal Ist Krieg is.

Cyberface one got me though
Quote by justinb904
im more of a social godzilla than chameleon

Quote by MetalMessiah665
Alright, I'll give them a try, Japanese Black Speed rarely disappoints.

Quote by azzemojo
Hmm judging from your pic you'd fit in more with a fat busted tribute.
#4
This particular part of a classic Motörhead song always makes me laugh:

You'll feel much better when you take these little pills
I'm gonna give you 60 bottles, I believe in overkill!
Quote by rg_metal
I love to utilize furniture to achieve the desired penetration.

UGH!
taste
kaygade
#6
For those who don't, it's a song by Nagaroth titled, "Black Metal Ist Krieg!"..

[edit] Ah, I was late.. oh well..
Wann kann ich dich von diesem Ort wegbringen?
Wann ist der Tod unser einziger Zuschauer?
Wann können wir schreien anstatt zu flüstern?
Wann ist der neue Anfang das Ende dieses traurigen Madrigals?
#7

Who is this Geoffrey?
All I see is this cold cadaver
Why is this Geoffrey
lying in puddles of pus on a gurney?
Tell me of this Geoffrey,
this boy with a noose around his neck;
More about Geoffrey:
why is he wearing his mother's bra?

How old was Geoffrey?
At a guess, I'd say
about twelve or thirteen;
He died accidentally
from auto-erotic asphyxiation;
He'd been masturbating...
our little stiff still has one on
and it's been one week!

The resurrection men
took their sweet time
Cross-dressed fruit:
what a way to die!
Now he's ours:
the apple of our eve;

Fetch the dead sphincter:
cold green meat
How did his ass taste?
Tender and sweet...

And then we fucked it...


Thank you Lord Worm.
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
Open up your funky mind and you can fly

Sumdeus
#8
Tiamat's Clouds is a great album, but the lyrics are awful...


...Then I turn to you and say

"I worship Lucifer"

Friends turned out to be "Never been friends"
Liars don't listen, do not comprehend
Make up great stories, I'm the principal character
Hand in hand with "Evil" and "Sinister"

...Then I turn to you and laugh

"I worship Satan"

Jaysus.....
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#9
I think when Editors slipped 'We become digestives' into one of their songs.

I forget the name of the song, but it's on the new album.
Time is a great teacher. Unfortunatly, it kills all of its pupils.
#12
BTBAM - The Man Land

CHORUS:
I'm a man!!
You're a man!!
We're a man!!
It's a man land!!

I got my pickup truck, and my toolbox out (goddamn yeah!)
I ain't no goddamn woman, i'll spit in you're mother****in land!

CHORUS (x1)

Yeah!!!
What are ya Jason?
A man
He's a goddamn man, not a goddamn woman!!!!
Yeah
Yeah
**** Yeah!!!!

CHORUS

Yeah
Yes
I ain't no little dag gone boy
Cette nuit j'ai rêvé que je mâchais ses yeux
Après avoir crevé par accès de furie
Ta replète panse d'helminthes blancs nourrie,
Trop prompte à déféquer le fruit d'un vit sanieux.
#13
^ Not really surprising given the quality of the music
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#14
Quote by Stranglehold
^ Not really surprising given the quality of the music

I agree with this.
#15
yeah what a god damned awful band.

no talent.
Cette nuit j'ai rêvé que je mâchais ses yeux
Après avoir crevé par accès de furie
Ta replète panse d'helminthes blancs nourrie,
Trop prompte à déféquer le fruit d'un vit sanieux.
#16
Jason Suecof's novelty side project, Crotchduster:


Crotchopus

Lets get in the van
Go to molly browns
I've been saving money for a month
If they close it down
We'll start a riot

Their damn atm charges ten dollars

Mystical vaginas are in my face
I smell the aroma of the gods
I'll give you the money
I brought with me
If you'll friction grind upon my rod

I'm done
That was like ten seconds

I got balls

(backwards stripper face)

I'd stick my hand right up her cartoon box
Too bad for her we dont have cartoon cocks
I'd like to give her a semen dip
Jessica rabbits got them cartoon tits
My dicks not hard it's just drawn that way
And we both know that the rabbits gay
I'd shoot up roger with some poison gas
So i could f**k you in your cartoon ass

Girl with a big face
I saw you at the bus stop
From a mile away
Even though it was really dark
Girl with a big face i love you more each day
Even though you're face
Is as big as a dinner plate

We hope that you enjoyed this
Crothcduster album
We hope that you like singing along
Right now we're really busy
Working on the next one
This time with help from doctor bronze



True Nature of Williams

Williams wont you wait a while
Williams wont you make us smile
No key will unlock the door
To an interdimensional dumptruck world
40 f**king tons of thundering bliss
The tip of southern hell
Aint even hotter than this
If you want to go to williamsburgland
You gotta check with cain
Because that dog is the man

I cant believe my eyes
Its shining in the sky
I hope cain enjoys my smell
So i can get inside

Welcome to my dumptruck
Inside williamsburgland
The power seats and cold a/c
Is under cains command
Men like me who poop and pee
Inside a coffee can
If you want to get inside
Three tests you will withstand

Dig a hole and live in it
And sleep in it for 15 days
Steal a goddamn police car
And drive it in a lake
Eat a prepubescent narcoleptic
Peeled and sauted steak
Last edited by DeusExMachina90 at Jan 5, 2010,
#17
I can't believe it took that long to mention Crotchduster.
LAMMERGEIER
Disclaimer: Dyer's Eve can not be held responsible for the loss of time spent or the insult to your aural senses as a result of exploring this link
#19
Cannabis Corpse, d'oh
Quote by Demonikk
'Practice amp' = amp you practice with? In my case, Peavey 6505+ and 4x12
I don't do things small


Except children.
#20
Raped by Elephants --- Torso****

There's one by Guttural Secrete that's especially hilarious, I forgot the song, but the very last lyrics are "My grandmother never did like my girlfriends" or something to that effect. The preceding lyrics will explain haha.

Schuldiner had some pretty funny (in a good way) lyrics in early Death as well. "I shit onto your guts" being my favorite haha.
#21
There's a couple of cringingly bad lines in early Maiden songs. One of my favourites being

The cable car's
the only way in
It's really impossible
to climb
Up The Boro!
#22
Scars of the way that my **** used to work
phallus expanded
engorged with blood convoluted
drugs are life, a zombie i've become
veins of dark green-color of weed
semen demon seed
posession, thc i bleed
I CUM BUD
scream for cum
i burst i squirt i spooge i use my prick to stone your face, your mouth, your eyes,your brain
stop, i can't, it burns, it turns into a gory mess
my ****'s a gory mess
the horrific pain
it will never end
possessed by evil
choking relentlessly
on buds from my flesh
they keep cuming out
stench begins to grow
drives me insane...insane...insane
buds fly forth to end your life now
like poison these nugs inside your womb
buds fly forth to end your miserable life
like poison, like poison in your womb
buds protrude from my **** in a painful display
stretching my dick larger and larger
oh, my dick, i want to die, this painful display
stretching my dick larger and larger
Scars of the way that my **** used to work
phallus expanded
engorged with blood convoluted
drugs are life, a zombie i've become
veins of dark green-color of weed
semen demon seed
posession, thc i bleed
I CUM BUD
the horrific pain
it will never end
possessed by evil
choking relentlessly
on buds from my flesh
they keep cuming out
stench begins to grow
drives me insane
scream for cum


cannabis corpse - i cum bud
#26
Quote by Riffmast
"In The Incantation Song The Ibex Moon It Sounds Like They Say "Itchy Turtle"



Incantation Said To Bleed For The Goat, But Instead I Made Your Daughter Bleed For Me

Philosophy > Life
#27
My post was ignored, I feel sad
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
Open up your funky mind and you can fly

Sumdeus
#29
I know it's old, but that "I can't believe how much this baby is bleeding" line from Devourment's Baby Killer always gets me.
Dyer's Eve is awesome, and has an abnormally large penis, which doesn't act as any hinderance to his everyday life despite its freakishly large size.
For unrivaled obedience, user King_ofKumbucha is awarded this spot of honor.
#30
that song overall is great.

I kill pregnant sluts and, whooooooooooooooooores
Free your mind and your ass will follow
The kingdom of heaven is within
Open up your funky mind and you can fly

Sumdeus
#31
It's just all so matter-of-fact, like he's doing a job interview.

"This is quite the resume, you've worked as a special hospital waste disposal manager?"
"Yes, I suck the abscess of dead infants."
"Interesting..."
Dyer's Eve is awesome, and has an abnormally large penis, which doesn't act as any hinderance to his everyday life despite its freakishly large size.
For unrivaled obedience, user King_ofKumbucha is awarded this spot of honor.
#33
Quote by romencer17

Who is this Geoffrey?
All I see is this cold cadaver
Why is this Geoffrey
lying in puddles of pus on a gurney?
Tell me of this Geoffrey,
this boy with a noose around his neck;
More about Geoffrey
why is he wearing his mother's bra?

How old was Geoffrey?
At a guess, I'd say
about twelve or thirteen;
He died accidentally
from auto-erotic asphyxiation;
He'd been masturbating...
our little stiff still has one on
and it's been one week!

The resurrection men
took their sweet time
Cross-dressed fruit:
what a way to die!
Now he's ours:
the apple of our eve;

Fetch the dead sphincter:
cold green meat
How did his ass taste?
Tender and sweet...

And then we ****ed it...


Thank you Lord Worm.




Wait, Lord Worm is a band?
Wann kann ich dich von diesem Ort wegbringen?
Wann ist der Tod unser einziger Zuschauer?
Wann können wir schreien anstatt zu flüstern?
Wann ist der neue Anfang das Ende dieses traurigen Madrigals?
#34
Quote by RAH7747


Wait, Lord Worm is a band?

Lord Worm is Cryptopsy's ex-vocalist.
Uncle Vernon, Uncle Vernon,
independent as a hog on ice,
He's a big shot down there at the slaughterhouse,
Plays accordion for Mr. Weiss
#35
Quote by dead-fish
It's just all so matter-of-fact, like he's doing a job interview.

"This is quite the resume, you've worked as a special hospital waste disposal manager?"
"Yes, I suck the abscess of dead infants."
"Interesting..."





Also, DF lyrics are sometimes waaay over the top ridiculous.
#36
You can't just mention Raped by Elephants, you have to post it!

I was visiting in Africa two months ago
My goal was to see all those wild animals
Most excited I was when I came close to elephants
They were so big and somehow so scary
Something happened when I snapped a picture
Three elephants surrounded me
One of them ripped off all my clothes
Second elephant came on me and started to spread my buttocks
With its huge trunk
I screamed in agony when I felt it started to shove up my ass
Third elephant forced me to take its giant **** in my mouth
I sucked like a ***** while I was ass****ed by elephant trunk
After all it wasnt too bad at all
It took only about ten minutes and **** in my mouth started to cum
Extremely huge load of elephant sperm filled my throat and
Spurted all over my face
I was completely ****ed up, but elephants had one more thing to do
All three of them huffed and puffed shits on me
Then they left me alone with my ripped asshole
I'll never go to Africa again


Lord Gores Involuntary Vaginal Vermin Slut is pretty good to.

You defiled my trust, you *****!
Slut, betrayed after all that I've done.
Gave you everything and ****ed your brains out.
Ate your snatch like a roastbeef sandwich.
Licked out your asshole and drank your breastmilk.

Heartless, adultress, you crumble underneath my fist.
Never wanted this, but bitch you forced my hand.
You wouldn't suck my dick, and now I understand.
Welcome home, to a world of pain.
Your life is over, your lover's gone ****ing... insane.

Behold my instruments of torture,
the hideous vermin mass.
A writhing amalgam of insects,
fills your unfaithful snatch & ass.

Deep inside can you feel them?
As they scratch for a passage out.
Why should you scream to have them inside you
when everyone's ****ed that ****?

I can almost taste your pain.
Filled with hate you scream my name.
Spread your legs one final time
and scream out loud in vain.

Now **** you will pay my price.
Wriggling sick torture device...
stomach bristling, bulging with my
filthy vermin vengeance.

Now your suffering is almost complete,
tearing the membrane as all of them meet.
Asshole and pussy are torn into one.
Cockroaches twitch and the spilled fluids run.
#37
^ Indeed quite disturbing
Quote by rg_metal
I love to utilize furniture to achieve the desired penetration.

UGH!
taste
kaygade
#38
Gesalbt vom Sakrament - der Ziege
Kotverzierter - gegei?elter Heiland
Der Chor des Stolzes - zelebriert
Das Evangelium - des Fleisches

Fukk - the blood - of christ
The sabbath - of the goat
Fukk - the blood - of christ
Hellsperm - das Heilwerk des Bockes

Die Verehrung - des Arsches
Der Ketzertanz - der Sodomiten
Tetelostali - es ist Vollbracht
Ertrankt in Flammen - der Aeon der Verfluchten

Fukk - the blood - of christ
The sabbath - of the goat
Fukk - the blood - of christ
Hellsperm - das Heilwerk des Bockes

word gets me everytime
Quote by JacobTheMe
JacobTheEdit: Hell yeah Ruben.

Quote by Jackal58
I met Jesus once. Cocksucker still owes me 20 bucks.
#39
Quote by diofan88
Gesalbt vom Sakrament - der Ziege
Kotverzierter - gegei?elter Heiland
Der Chor des Stolzes - zelebriert
Das Evangelium - des Fleisches

Fukk - the blood - of christ
The sabbath - of the goat
Fukk - the blood - of christ
Hellsperm - das Heilwerk des Bockes

Die Verehrung - des Arsches
Der Ketzertanz - der Sodomiten
Tetelostali - es ist Vollbracht
Ertrankt in Flammen - der Aeon der Verfluchten

Fukk - the blood - of christ
The sabbath - of the goat
Fukk - the blood - of christ
Hellsperm - das Heilwerk des Bockes

word gets me everytime

Belphegor? Sounds like Belphegor to me.
I think you'd find the other words way funnier if you'd actually know what they mean.
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